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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/13/2013 :  17:35:32  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
i don't enjoy pooping. obviously, it feels good to get shit out, but then there's the clean up.

but, if i may be candid, my recent twofers have been quick and clean. i may want to keep this doppelbock around!

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they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/13/2013 :  18:55:54  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by trobrianders

The occasional 2 dump day can be uplifting, spiritually. While 5 hours of keepy inny could be risky business. What exactly are the moral benefits of merging?

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo



when you say that a 2 dump day is occasional does that mean usually you are at 3? or 1?

green star member since 2006. smb?
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/13/2013 :  18:57:23  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jose Jones

i don't enjoy pooping. obviously, it feels good to get shit out, but then there's the clean up.

but, if i may be candid, my recent twofers have been quick and clean. i may want to keep this doppelbock around!

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.



i'm not sure what to say about that. i kind of thought we were bros. now, i have questions

green star member since 2006. smb?
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 06/14/2013 :  00:34:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by floop

quote:
Originally posted by trobrianders

The occasional 2 dump day can be uplifting, spiritually. While 5 hours of keepy inny could be risky business. What exactly are the moral benefits of merging?

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo



when you say that a 2 dump day is occasional does that mean usually you are at 3? or 1?

green star member since 2006. smb?


I'm shocked. Three daily lots of number twos?! That's like multiples beyond my comprehension. Like Jose, my devotion to this thread has definite limits. But I am in awe at how far you're extending the science.

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 06/14/2013 :  00:38:05  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jose Jones

but, if i may be candid

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.

Please

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo
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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/14/2013 :  12:23:48  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by floop

quote:
Originally posted by Jose Jones

i don't enjoy pooping. obviously, it feels good to get shit out, but then there's the clean up.

but, if i may be candid, my recent twofers have been quick and clean. i may want to keep this doppelbock around!

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.



i'm not sure what to say about that. i kind of thought we were bros. now, i have questions

green star member since 2006. smb?




i don't like wiping my ass, floop. no sir, i don't like it. but like i said, things have been looking up.

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/15/2013 :  18:35:39  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Jose Jones

quote:
Originally posted by floop

quote:
Originally posted by Jose Jones

i don't enjoy pooping. obviously, it feels good to get shit out, but then there's the clean up.

but, if i may be candid, my recent twofers have been quick and clean. i may want to keep this doppelbock around!

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.



i'm not sure what to say about that. i kind of thought we were bros. now, i have questions

green star member since 2006. smb?




i don't like wiping my ass, floop. no sir, i don't like it. but like i said, things have been looking up.

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.



can you elaborate?

green star member since 2006. smb?
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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2013 :  17:54:27  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
less mess. succinct minor shits, scattered throughout the day.

i am now a user of a smartphone. things may be getting crazy in this thread.

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they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/18/2013 :  07:28:13  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i honestly can't imagine how I would take a shit without my phone. what would I do? just sit there with my thoughts?

green star member since 2006. smb?
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tisasawath
= Cult of Ray =

Wallis and Futuna Islands
783 Posts

Posted - 06/18/2013 :  09:15:30  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
come next summer olympics i should remind myself to pay more attention to the high diving action, study their technique for perfect entry, work some on that.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/18/2013 :  09:18:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I know what you mean

green star member since 2006. smb?
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2013 :  02:03:19  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by tisasawath

technique for perfect entry

The perfect plop?

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2013 :  04:42:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
when it's perfect there is no plop. there's no sound at all. and no wipe (just 1 to check)

green star member since 2006. smb?
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2013 :  04:59:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Urban legend

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo
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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2013 :  12:29:50  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
This is it- the inaugural jose commode post, observing all bylaws.

5:30, short and sweet. 2nd dump of the day.

All right, gotta go make fish for dinner.

------------------------------
they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/21/2013 :  06:56:01  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i heard that James Gandolfini passed away while in the commode (true story). it feels like we should do something for him here

green star member since 2006. smb?
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 06/22/2013 :  16:20:58  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by floop

i heard that James Gandolfini passed away while in the commode (true story). it feels like we should do something for him here

green star member since 2006. smb?


No need. James Lipton already licked his asshole clean.

_______________
Ed is the hoo hoo
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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/22/2013 :  17:47:45  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by floop

i heard that James Gandolfini passed away while in the commode (true story). it feels like we should do something for him here

green star member since 2006. smb?




P.O.I.D.H.

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they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/23/2013 :  17:43:37  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
que?

green star member since 2006. smb?
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Jose Jones
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1758 Posts

Posted - 06/24/2013 :  13:57:54  Show Profile  Visit Jose Jones's Homepage  Reply with Quote
pics or it didn't happen

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they were the heroes of old, men of renown.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/24/2013 :  18:53:26  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
http://www.naughtybutnicerob.com/james-gandolfini-has-died-developing/

green star member since 2006. smb?
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danjersey
> Teenager of the Year <

USA
2787 Posts

Posted - 07/01/2013 :  07:52:47  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Kung Pow Pasta = Kung Powed Commode

note to self, stay inside the box
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 07/01/2013 :  08:09:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Perfect plops, no sound, no wipe. It's bothering me. I just don't buy it. Why'd you put that out there floop?

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Ed is the hoo hoo
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

USA
5448 Posts

Posted - 07/01/2013 :  18:48:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Only the Chinese can achieve that.
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tisasawath
= Cult of Ray =

Wallis and Futuna Islands
783 Posts

Posted - 07/02/2013 :  10:48:55  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i can occasionally manage 2 out of 3, while being caucasian.
the exact contributing factors still elude me, though. more research is needed.
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trobrianders
> Teenager of the Year <

Papua New Guinea
3302 Posts

Posted - 07/09/2013 :  00:57:49  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by darwin

Only the Chinese can achieve that.

Yes, I think I could accept that

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Ed is the hoo hoo
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 09/25/2013 :  07:36:32  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
9/25/13 - 10:35am

experiencing a sudden reminder that I went to a late night burrito place last night, and had extra helpings of habanero sauce


green star member since 2006. smb?
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tisasawath
= Cult of Ray =

Wallis and Futuna Islands
783 Posts

Posted - 10/06/2013 :  10:12:57  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
clean (as in no-wipe-needed) couple of consecutive endeavors in the last days, a pleasant surprise. saved paper, helped the environment. i mean, not hurt it as bad as usually. i feel like i should be doing that dog thing afterwards, proudly scrape the ground with my hind paws or something.

i should probably attribute this to a diet of fusili made of whole grain spelt flour and tomato and pepper sauce with some herbs thrown in, all from organic farming, some place in Italy. followed by a massive load of choc coated marzipan filled with plums dipped in madeira wine.

i'm trying not to dismiss other possible factors, things out of the ordinary.. like, recently finished a lengthy project, so more relaxed... also, favourite band is releasing new music... also in retrospect the onset was sudden and my mind was blank on all occasions, like it'd been ambushed almost, so maybe the key (or key ingredient) is not to focus during.

as for the inaudiability of the entry, i give up. the "ploing" is unavoidable i think, not without going to some extremes, like severely reducing the distance of the free-fall section, beyond my personal risk/reward comfort zone. i feel like i don't need to enjoy the silence that bad, i prefer to stay dry (especially after a dry exit). i'm open to other ideas tho.
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Little Black Francis
> Teenager of the Year <

3648 Posts

Posted - 10/06/2013 :  16:05:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
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tisasawath
= Cult of Ray =

Wallis and Futuna Islands
783 Posts

Posted - 10/06/2013 :  20:49:43  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i don't want to be compartmentalized, people are not that one-dimensional
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <

Canada
4307 Posts

Posted - 10/07/2013 :  16:09:17  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
bristol came up with a chart for shits. thats awesome. i personally would have named each "type" after the provider of the observed sample. haha

"Do Re Me So Far So Good"
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 10/07/2013 :  17:44:05  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
this chart will be helpful for this log (no pun intended). i think Type should be part of everyones header. Date, Time, Location, Description, Type #

green star member since 2006. smb?
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tisasawath
= Cult of Ray =

Wallis and Futuna Islands
783 Posts

Posted - 10/27/2013 :  04:31:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
bristol type: 11.5
description: class 6 whitewater rapids. colon resembling waterpark slide.
thought i had cholera or something. either that or my bladder got rewired.

a note from one of the early rounds: it should be part of building code or architects' code, feng shui etc, to reduce corners and obstructions on the path to the lavatory in a building to a minimum. turning corners is hazardous, muscles have plenty to deal with without them.
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

USA
5448 Posts

Posted - 11/06/2013 :  16:36:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I like it. You should be able slide right into the bathroom just like your stool sliding through your colon. Making it a harmonious experience.
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 11/06/2013 :  21:13:32  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Piles are a nightmare. That's all I have to say.
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