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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
 Posted - 08/16/2007 : 19:21:30
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speedy, that is wicked excellent! Congrats!
For what it's worth, gleefully divorced after 19 years, I see a small number of married friends who are truly thriving in their longterm marriages and an equally small number of purposely single friends who likewise are happy -- and way too many unhappy marrieds who are too scared to face the fiscal decimation that is divorce and too many singles who feel there is something wrong with them because they're not adhering to societal expectations.
I got some heaven in my head
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7443 Posts |
Posted - 08/17/2007 : 01:23:05
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In fact it was kinda weird to read your posts in this thread, k, seeing that if I'm correct you parted ways with your husband not so long after that, and look quite happy of having done it. Sorry if I'm talking about too personal things.
Anyway. For those who are keeping stats, I've been married for 6 years.
Denis
"Can you hear me? I aint got shit to say." |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 08/17/2007 : 01:26:25
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Yah, it was weird reading this thread. My need to pretend everything was dandy was at its highest right before I asked him for a divorce. Weird, weird.
I got some heaven in my head
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/17/2007 : 05:57:00
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Congratulations Mike2.
 I'd walk her everyday, into a shady place
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =
USA
876 Posts |
Posted - 08/17/2007 : 21:05:48
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I know a few married people who shouldn't even be together, never mind married.
And weddings are the worst- people are more worried about "their day" than making sure that their guests are comfortable.
I'm don't have a position on gay marriage- on one hand, life is short and people should be able to be with who they want.
On the other hand, I don't like people coming along and changing the whole meaning of a word and expecting everyone to go along with it.
Love? For 90% of human history marriage had very little to do with love the way we think of it.
check out my friend's paintings at http://myspace.com/landspeedsong |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 08/18/2007 : 02:45:42
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 08/18/2007 : 05:17:33
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Take it to the Pet Peeves thread, jimmy. Weddings can be really sweet. The best one I've attended was for a same-sex couple, who ought to have every right.
I got some heaven in my head
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =
USA
876 Posts |
Posted - 08/18/2007 : 10:18:51
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I love going to weddings. I'd go see two squirrels get married just so I could have some cake.
check out my friend's paintings at http://myspace.com/landspeedsong |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 08/18/2007 : 10:23:54
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jimmy, your contradictory nature is yet another reason why I love you as much as I do, and I love you a lot, jimmy.
In one post you say "wedding are the worst" and in your next post you claim to "love going to weddings." Chicks dig men with complexity.
I got some heaven in my head
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 08/18/2007 : 11:19:57
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I'm off today to my 2nd of 3 weddings this summer. Napa Valley with vintage clothes (50s-70s) and then we're camping for a couple days afterward.
This signature moderated courtesy Cult of Frank. |
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =
USA
876 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 09:30:39
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Kate, I see a wedding as a day where you're joined forever with the love of your life, and you want to share your happiness with all your loved ones- I've heard people say ( or I've read it in Dear Abby )-
"I don't want my father to come unless he agrees not to drink".
"I don't want my sister-in-law to be in the bridal party. She's 50 pounds overweight"
"When ____ got married, I spent $200 on their wedding gift, they clearly spent less than that on my gift. Do I really have to send them a Thank you note?"
check out my friend's paintings at http://myspace.com/landspeedsong |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 09:46:36
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If "Kate" is jimmy's nickname for me, I will faint with happiness.
I got some heaven in my head
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <
Canada
4307 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 09:54:03
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my wife and i have been married exactly 1 year. we celebrated thursday night(i have to work today). all i can say is i hope the first year is the hardest. we butt heads on a lot of issues. that being said, the love is still there and i feel we've turned a corner. when we did our pre-marital counseling we were told if you last past the first 5 years you chances of seeing it through to the end are significantly better, and even better still after 10 years. i have two good friends who were in LTR's and got married after 6 or 7 years; one divorced after 6 months, the other after a year and a half. i think people are getting married when they are older now so in that regards are putting more thought into the whole idea behind it, and this is bringing the divorce rate down. i have known my wife for 15 years now (we spent a 5 year period without even speaking), i honestly would not have cosidered marriage without her, i would have been happy with a common-law or even being single, but with her, marriage just seems right.
congrats speedy, good luck.
The waxworks were an immensely eloquent dissertation on the wonderful ordinariness of mankind. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 10:11:48
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quote:
Originally posted by shineoftheever
i have two good friends who were in LTR's
The waxworks were an immensely eloquent dissertation on the wonderful ordinariness of mankind.
Cool. Were they in the whole trilogy?
I'd walk her everyday, into a shady place
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~
Belize
5305 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 11:39:34
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I am very luckly and have been happily married for almost four years and we dated for a year and a half. But, I would say that we would be just as happy even if we weren't offically married.
bluefinger |
Edited by - Daisy Girl on 08/19/2007 11:39:55 |
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coastline
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3111 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 12:09:18
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quote:
Originally posted by shineoftheever
all i can say is i hope the first year is the hardest.
I thought the first was a breeze. The eighth, however, just about killed us. But you know what they say about that which doesn't kill you. (It leaves you forever scarred.)
 Please pardon me, for these my wrongs. |
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <
Canada
4307 Posts |
Posted - 08/19/2007 : 23:38:06
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maybe the hardest years are age related. i think the reason my wife and i butt heads is cause we've both been single for so long really. i mean we both had relationships and also we each lived with other people for short periods, but when you commit to each other you have to adjust, it's imperitive, it's either that or the D word. (i'm setting you up there homer!)
The waxworks were an immensely eloquent dissertation on the wonderful ordinariness of mankind. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/20/2007 : 05:56:58
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I'm all out now.
I agree with you though Jon, I think it's harder to adjust when you are so used to being single. That's why I still like to have time on my own, and don't sleep as well with her. I'll get there.
I'd walk her everyday, into a shady place
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 08/20/2007 : 07:13:26
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Its funny, because my fiance and i never lived together, but have spent many nights together, and i find i sleep better with her next to me already. I guess that's a plus.
- Brian |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/20/2007 : 13:45:15
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Definitely. I envy you.
That said, it is getting better.
I'd walk her everyday, into a shady place
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =
USA
876 Posts |
Posted - 08/20/2007 : 16:44:14
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I have a question for the married/ engaged people- who proposed?
Also, for everyone, what do you think is better: long or short engagement?
check out my friend's paintings at http://myspace.com/landspeedsong |
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~
Belize
5305 Posts |
Posted - 08/20/2007 : 20:28:13
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I have a hard time sleeping with out my hubby around. I know it sounds crazy but his snoring sort of puts me to sleep.
My husband proposed by putting together a photo album of our time together. Then he put in the photo slots "Will you marry me". Then he got down on one knee and pulled out a humming bird Christmas ordiment he had picked up on a vacation (long but funny back story there) and it had a little ring on its beak. (I am sorry but I love that story and haven't told it for awhile....thanks for indulging me.)
I don't know what is better long or short. We had a short one.
bluefinger |
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breakmybody
- FB Fan -
Greenland
136 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 01:42:30
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Hi there, it's been a while, maybe some of you still remember me...I'm alive and my marriage is finishing at the moment.
I was the one that thought that marriage was for life, how could I be so naif??? that n/a was blind...
Hope all of you that used to know me are well,
Love, hugs and kisses for you
p.s. Congratulations Mike, first for the engagement and second for the band, I knew you would make it!!!
You can run, but you can't hide who you are
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Edited by - breakmybody on 08/21/2007 02:27:44 |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 04:26:21
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Sorry to hear that. It's sad that such circumstances bring you back, but welcome back all the same.
I'd walk her everyday, into a shady place
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 07:58:19
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quote:
Originally posted by breakmybody
Hi there, it's been a while, maybe some of you still remember me...I'm alive and my marriage is finishing at the moment.
I was the one that thought that marriage was for life, how could I be so naif??? that n/a was blind...
Hope all of you that used to know me are well,
Love, hugs and kisses for you
p.s. Congratulations Mike, first for the engagement and second for the band, I knew you would make it!!!
You can run, but you can't hide who you are
Wow, I hope everything is alright for you.
Does this mean you'll come back now?
__________
Fuck off I got work to do. |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 09:04:22
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quote:
Originally posted by breakmybody
Hi there, it's been a while, maybe some of you still remember me...I'm alive and my marriage is finishing at the moment.
I was the one that thought that marriage was for life, how could I be so naif??? that n/a was blind...
Hope all of you that used to know me are well,
Love, hugs and kisses for you
p.s. Congratulations Mike, first for the engagement and second for the band, I knew you would make it!!!
You can run, but you can't hide who you are
Welcome back. I'm sorry to hear your news... though I hope that this is what is best for you and your family.
www.myspace.com/wewereloversmusic |
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breakmybody
- FB Fan -
Greenland
136 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 09:26:38
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Well, it's not a come back, my life is changing , and I have a lot to think about and to do, as I am by myself now, with a lot of work, my children, house, etc... It's like getting used to a new life, and it's not very easy but it is as it has to be.
I just remember you often and today I felt like opening my heart.
You can run, but you can't hide who you are
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coastline
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3111 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 09:42:56
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quote:
Originally posted by breakmybody
Well, it's not a come back, my life is changing , and I have a lot to think about and to do, as I am by myself now, with a lot of work, my children, house, etc... It's like getting used to a new life, and it's not very easy but it is as it has to be.
I just remember you often and today I felt like opening my heart.
This post strikes a real chord with me. It was the fear of facing a new life that ultimately led me to the decision to not quit when my own marriage was at the bottom. I knew I wouldn't have the strength to do it, and I applaud you for muddling through this time. It's trite to say, but things happen for a reason, and you'll reach the other side a better person.
Please pardon me, for these my wrongs. |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 09:51:27
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I don't really think I can understand or relate to what you're going through; I don't think anything would say would carry much weight. I wish you all the best.
www.myspace.com/wewereloversmusic |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 18:46:07
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Hey, in case you don't know, I've gotten divorced since you were here last and am much, much happier. I would love to help out any way I can. xo K
I got some heaven in my head
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love_frankblack
- FB Fan -
China
3 Posts |
Posted - 08/21/2007 : 22:39:03
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I agree with marriage, i think marriage is good.
[url=http://www.qweas.com/]Qweas[/url] |
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PixieSteve
> Teenager of the Year <
Poland
4698 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2007 : 05:27:29
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profound
"Idiot" is just her sig. |
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mr.biscuitdoughhead
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1729 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2007 : 05:36:16
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i think love_frankblack is the smartest spammer ever, how many other spammers have an fb-related username?
Are you looking for the motherlode?" |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 08/22/2007 : 08:19:57
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But smarter spammers know where to put the "]".
This signature moderated courtesy Cult of Frank. |
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Topic |
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marriage vs. not marrying
