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bazza
* Dog in the Sand *
Ireland
1439 Posts |
 Posted - 06/20/2003 : 09:55:32
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a frankie dettori probably!
:o) |
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Brackish Girl
~ Soul Eater ~
Ireland
1750 Posts |
Posted - 06/20/2003 : 16:46:25
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the henhouse is goin again!
recently nothing that weird has happened to me (c'mon i'm 16!) but last night(no, wait, two nights ago...) i went camping with some friends, two of the guys brought a few lumps of hasheeeeeesh substance(and the hostess grows li'l mariuanas in her room) and there seemed to be lots of bottles of rum and vodka goin around,but i was surprisingly tolerant, and so had to watch my female friends cos some of the guys were being a little too friendly(and obviously trying to take advantage cos some of the girls were truly WHACKED). anyways, a lot of us ended up goin back to her room to be warm and dry(it was raining all night). anyways, i was flitting in and out of sleep, and every so often i would hear the hostess and this guy she liked(who somehow were snuggles together in her broken bed-dont ask) giggling and sayin 'paper beats rock!' 'i hate this rock scissors paper game, lets play thumb-wars!' and in my half-conciece state, it seemed rather innocent. in the mornin, she told me if he won these games she would have to do him a few 'favours', but she won most of 'em. actually, she told me he had been, ahem, 'tickling' her all night and then he says she had to do the same for him. i was askin her why this was all such a problem for her, since she liked him so much. then she reminded me he has a girlfriend, and he was being an asshole anyway. sorry for havin to say all this, but this was a huge crisis for her for the last few days for her, therefore it was for me too. luckily, i am now home, and she cannot contact me.
in your face, space coyote!! |
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steveplymouthuk
= Cult of Ray =
United Kingdom
639 Posts |
Posted - 06/21/2003 : 01:40:35
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rock paper scissors doesn't sound like too bad a crisis. Sounds like one hell of a camping trip!
Today I'm packing up and going home to cornwall for the summer  |
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Ten Percenter
- FB Enquirer -
United Kingdom
1733 Posts |
Posted - 06/21/2003 : 08:05:47
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quote:
Originally posted by bazza
a frankie dettori probably!
:o)
Great image, Barry!
No man is an island, unless he is in the bath |
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Thomas
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1615 Posts |
Posted - 06/21/2003 : 12:12:07
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All this talk is leaving me out of the conversation. I've been out of action for 4 months now. Nothing, Nada, Zilch. You don't know how much is built up inside me. In just a few more days I'll be back in the saddle again. Yeah me and poor Mrs. Brown.
Thomas
"Our love is rice and beans and horses lard" |
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Ten Percenter
- FB Enquirer -
United Kingdom
1733 Posts |
Posted - 06/21/2003 : 17:50:46
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I fear that Mrs Brown might be in for a rough ride. If so, please report back to the HH
No man is an island, unless he is in the bath |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 06/22/2003 : 14:05:28
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| Haha...since talk has been slow lately, I have another questions for all the mothers out there. Is it true that once you give birth, your...you know...never returns to its original size? My girlfriend is all freaked out about ever having a baby and becoming permanently loose. |
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blackpurse
= Cult of Ray =
USA
299 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 05:05:28
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quote:
Originally posted by El Barto
Haha...since talk has been slow lately, I have another questions for all the mothers out there. Is it true that once you give birth, your...you know...never returns to its original size? My girlfriend is all freaked out about ever having a baby and becoming permanently loose.
Well, I had a C-Section.... so you'll have to ask Steaknsabre. If he's noticed a huge difference, he hasn't said anything to me. And that should be a good piece of advice for you right there.
No DUH, of COURSE it's going to get stretched out a bit. You just shoved a watermelon through a hole that normally doesn't handle anything larger than a kielbasa! If it gets TOO loose there's surgery that can correct things, but frankly, what ends up happening is that with the right guy, (again, Barto, ball's in your court so to speak) life gets BETTER because it takes longer to uh, uh, you know.... and its actually a blessing in disguise. Lots more fun for her.
I wouldn't recommend a C just to avoid that though. Girlfriend needs to face some facts. In many ways, there comes a point in your life when you have to face the fact that you get older and you're not built like a teenager anymore. You tits start to sag, (especially if you breastfeed, still recommended nonetheless!) you get a little looser (and again, this is why post-partum women start to really blossom in the sack), you might even get a dunlap that no amount of situps will cure. And so, she will have to accept the fact that when she goes to the obgyn, her speculum size will be ratcheded up from "12-year-old-virgin" closer to "Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy". OK, not that bad, but this really is her chance to make lemonade from lemons. (Recommended reading: "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy" -- author Vicki Iovine give it to you straight about the good and bad, and what you can and can't do about it.)
What really broke my heart was when my feet swelled up, I grew a shoe size and a half, and postpartum that only shrunk up by a half shoe size. I had to give away a good portion of my Imelda-esque shoe collection because they didn't fit anymore. Now THAT's a problem!!! |
Edited by - blackpurse on 06/23/2003 06:04:49 |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 14:05:48
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Really! I was way more bummed about what childbearing did to my feet than to my girly bits. All those shoes. . . gone! I also bear a deep grudge against the evil Stretch Mark Fairy.
I had a 9-1/2 pound baby at home and nursed her for a couple of years, and I haven't noticed any drastic differences down thar (as we like to say down here). If anything, things seem to function much better than they used to and sex is way more fun. I think this is the universe's way of rewarding women for going through the ordeal of childbirth. Anyone who's had a baby deserves multiple orgasms for eternity. (Eternal breakfast in bed wouldn't hurt, either.)
I actually read the other day that, once you're over 30, it doesn't matter whether you've given birth or not--things start loosening up on their own.
And, honest to god, the problem of finding time for sex is much more of a concern than whatever cruel jokes motherhood may have played on one's body. |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 14:14:22
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| I was pretty disappointed at what breastfeeding does to the boobs! |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 15:47:59
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| Argh! It sounds like a blessing to ye but a curse to me. Getting a little personal, I couldn't...finish...from sex for a long time (almost a year, I think). I needed extra help, and I still take a long time (am I the chosen one or something?). Err, yeah. Soooo...if it ever takes any longer, by the time I'm done, the sun's coming up and we're eating breakfast. |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 15:48:27
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| ^^^ That was post 1111 for me...oneday, monday. |
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blackpurse
= Cult of Ray =
USA
299 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 17:55:51
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quote:
Originally posted by mereubu
I also bear a deep grudge against the evil Stretch Mark Fairy.
Oy! I wrote a load of Haiku on behalf of my baby on her behalf, the most popular of which went:
Mommy did I cause
these red marks on your tummy
Sorry about that
I now bear them proudly and will show anybody who asks my C-section scar, like survival of battle that I am.
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/23/2003 : 21:12:53
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At least you've got a scar you can show in polite company. Show Me Your Tear--now THERE' s an album title for ya. Nobody wants to see that. (Or read about it either! I can just hear you guys: "Run Away! Run Away!")
Loved the stretch mark haiku. Yesterday my daughter and I were showering together at the lake after a swim, and she pointed and asked, "What did that?" I said, "YOU!" She thought that was hilarious. I just smiled and said, "Laugh it up, girlie. One day, you too will look like The Rand McNally Road Atlas from hip to hip." She thought that was even funnier.
Gee, Jim, that's a bummer. (Well, for you, anyway.) Yep, I'd be checking for some kind of "Chosen One" birthmark. I once had a leisurely boyfriend. We were together for four years and over time he gradually became more, um, efficient, so take hope. |
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Leah
= Cult of Ray =
United Kingdom
314 Posts |
Posted - 06/24/2003 : 03:36:49
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I say stretch marks are God's way of reminding you where you're priorities are in life.
Or that maybe you should have listened to YOUR mother!.
Just recently chatting with my oldest mate over a bottle of wine and it was decided that at the age we are; it is very more important how WE feel about ourselves than anything a man - no matter WHO he is - can say.
And frankly; at the age we are we're secure enough to get our kicks independently - and not get a complex about it.
Another thing that we decided was that boyfriends are okay and relationships are evil and bad for your health.
Was quite a good night really!
Every choice human being strives instinctively for a citadel and a secrecy where he is saved from the crowd -
Nietzsche |
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Ten Percenter
- FB Enquirer -
United Kingdom
1733 Posts |
Posted - 06/24/2003 : 03:42:15
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Kids are worth is, leah. And being male I don't have stretch marks! Only last week my older daughter said to me "daddy, I do like Chuck Prophet. But if I am being honest, I prefer Frank Black".
Indoctrination has had a bad press.
No man is an island, unless he is in the bath |
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mergzez7
- FB Fan -
France
166 Posts |
Posted - 06/24/2003 : 04:15:52
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Has any of you ever had enough of sex? (i'm asking women cause i suppose men never get bored with it)
zez |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 06/24/2003 : 07:51:10
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| I would assume you would have to have, at minimum, "some" to ever get to a point of "enough". Being a guy, of course, I don't see a time in the near future where my need in that dept. will be satiated, and I sincerely hope that never happens. |
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mergzez7
- FB Fan -
France
166 Posts |
Posted - 06/24/2003 : 12:48:28
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quote:
Originally posted by speedy_m
I would assume you would have to have, at minimum, "some" to ever get to a point of "enough".
Wise guy.
zez |
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bazza
* Dog in the Sand *
Ireland
1439 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 06:06:17
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quote:
Originally posted by mereubu
Show Me Your Tear--now THERE' s an album title for ya.
Sarah! 
If you can keep your head when all around you have lost theirs, then you probably haven't understood the seriousness of the situation. - David Brent |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 07:52:12
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| Heh-heh. I was beginning to wonder if anyone caught that. |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 08:00:09
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quote:
Originally posted by mergzez7
quote:
Originally posted by speedy_m
I would assume you would have to have, at minimum, "some" to ever get to a point of "enough".
Wise guy.
zez
I wasn't trying to wise! I'm far from wise! I'm incoherant and rambling at best! I was actually referring to myself, thinking how comical a concept that is; "getting enough". I've had none for so long "enough" seems like a ludicrous concept. It's like getting tired of Frank. I just don't see it happening. Bad analogy though, I get lots of Frank.... |
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blackpurse
= Cult of Ray =
USA
299 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 08:00:17
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quote:
Originally posted by mereubu
Heh-heh. I was beginning to wonder if anyone caught that.
Oh, I did and slammed my thighs together in perceived pain. |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 09:24:45
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| Sorry! I think it probably sounds worse than it was, if that's any consolation. I'll tell you, though, that was the real drawback to the homebirth. Everything went fine and I never had a point during labor when I was like, "Give me drugs or I'll kill you all!" but afterwards I would really have appreciated some heavy painkillers. Tylenol 3, please! |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 09:32:56
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| Did you know that there are such things as Tylenol 4s? Tylenol 3s are like gold around my house, you won't catch us throwing out the unused prescription. |
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blackpurse
= Cult of Ray =
USA
299 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 09:49:55
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quote:
Originally posted by mereubu
Sorry! I think it probably sounds worse than it was, if that's any consolation. I'll tell you, though, that was the real drawback to the homebirth. Everything went fine and I never had a point during labor when I was like, "Give me drugs or I'll kill you all!" but afterwards I would really have appreciated some heavy painkillers. Tylenol 3, please!
Oy. I really tried hard to maintain my tough broad persona and ride it out, but husband sort of predicted I'd be calling for the drugs early and dammit if he wasn't right. I was induced, and four hours in, the nurse came by and gently asked me, (because the monitor was popping off the paper) "Would you like to try some nubane," and I said "Yes if its not too much trouble," as though I were asking a waitress to get me some more cream for my coffee. 2 hours after that, I basically said "to hell with this. Call the guy with the spinal tap, I'm ready for an eppy!" Later we saw the insurance statement of benefits and saw that the anesthelogist charged something like $600 to put it in. A friend's jaw dropped, but my only reaction was "And to whom do I make out my check?" (a passing remark, since it was all covered by the insurance). Yes I'm a wimp, but because I had that epidural in already, when it came time for the emergency C, all they had to do was crank it up, so I got to be at least conscious and see baby immediately instead of waking up from a stupor.
... and let's not get into "The Pump" you get. "Now, just click that button if you think you need more percodan and it will administer it right into the veins..." "Oh, thank you, I don't think I'll be needing it THAT much" Yeah, right. You'd think I was playing a game of Space Invaders the way I hit that button.
I'm a wimp.
You don't want to know how much this all cost my insurance company.
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 10:06:15
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I need the collective goodwill and karma of the forum. I'm going on a much deserved but too short holiday to the lake. Now weather around here is pretty sketchy so please send out some good vibes for good weather. Because if it rains all next week I will be crying myself to sleep. Thanks.
Working is for chumps! |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 10:20:42
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All the moms will make their own cover album called Show me your Scar. |
Edited by - Carolynanna on 06/26/2003 10:21:26 |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 10:27:39
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Good luck and good weather, Carolyn! Hope you have a nice holiday.
Blackpurse, you're not a wimp--no one can hold out against the kind of contractions that induction causes; they're totally different and way stronger than the do-it-yourself kind. Crunch! Six hours of that kind of torture makes you Superwoman. |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 10:29:11
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quote:
Originally posted by Carolynanna
All the moms will make their own cover album called Show me your Scar.
Haha! I'll arm-wrestle you for "Suffering!" |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 10:56:17
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quote:
Originally posted by mereubu
quote:
Originally posted by Carolynanna
All the moms will make their own cover album called Show me your Scar.
Haha! I'll arm-wrestle you for "Suffering!"
Thanks mere,
38 hours, whatcha got, huh? |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 12:25:29
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| I'm afraid of all of you. I'm paralyzed with fear. And island rhythms. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 12:25:56
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I once spent 43 hours in an overturned outhouse.
Breathtaking, really, I suggest you try it. |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 12:29:05
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| Did you really? I'll bite, how'd it happen? Was it an aftergrad prank, did the onsite guys think it would be funny? |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 06/26/2003 : 12:29:31
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
Breathtaking, really, I suggest you try it.
Alright, I'm tittering like a school girl. I genuinely hope no one can hear me, I AM trying to keep up the pretense that I'm working in here. Such a beautiful, I'm lying out on the grass on the river front, sun on my face, enjoying the breeze on my lunch break, and I have crawl back to my 6' by 6' hole and hunch over at this desk and squint at numbers in Access. Thank God I've got Frank on my discman. Everything is new, uh huh.... |
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