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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
 Posted - 08/31/2004 : 10:21:54
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I used to live just across the street from a girl I liked (very much), who would have been perfect for me etc., and the way I read the signs she liked me too. However, it turns out she was already engaged which goes to show how inept men can be sometimes at that sort of thing. I guess its also possible that he's just as confused/struggling as you, don't rule out the possibility of men being sensitive as well.
So there you go, turns out I know a little and nothing at all of your situation at the same time! Best wishes though, I'm sure it'll work out well - maybe not in the way you expected, but nevertheless.
Finally: spud = potato = pomme de terre = apl of the earth.
Coincidence? I think not.
Kind regards,
Dr. Simon
Specialist In Broken Hearts |
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 12:34:31
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Yeah, I must say you are all making me realize that there is a big chance that even though this dumb boy and I have talked about this in the past, (and I still believe him to be very fucked up and scared) he has no way of knowing what I am feeling today. And that I still want to be with him, etc.
I am not saying that means I will DO anything but it is giving me something to think about...
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Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 12:39:29
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There is only 1 thing for it then, time to have the biggest heart to heart you have ever had. Pour it all out and give him a choice, either he wants to be with you or he never gets to be with you and you will soon move and never see him again. There needs to be an end to this for your sake.
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Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 13:07:08
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I gotta be the killjoy and throw this in here.
Even if it did all work out, you need to think hard
because people with baggage take a lot of patience
and a helluva lot of work.
They do things without even realizing why or even what they've done.
I'm not sure how he's broken, but just keep in mind that if you were to get together it could be a very long road to a healthy relationship.
__________
"The things that will destroy us are: politics without principle; pleasure without conscience; wealth without work; knowledge without character; business without morality; science without humanity,
and worship without sacrifice." |
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 13:18:31
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Yep, I know that. Kind of the reason for the sadness. Not to negate what you are saying b/c I hear you. I just have had many thoughts about this and the fact that I was good friends with his ex gives me a very CLEAR perspective of what things would be like with him. He has a lot of damage, he's a mess. I realize this.
If a person is The One, does that automatically mean you end up with them? I don't think so.
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Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 13:26:53
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quote:
Originally posted by ramona
If a person is The One, does that automatically mean you end up with them? I don't think so.
I say absolutely not. We all have to make the effort find someone that is right for us and for many of us that means taking risks that we want to avoid.
I also don't believe in The One because it implies that the person is going to be perfect us. Life isn't perfect and your partner isn't going to be perfect, but they should make you happy. |
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 13:36:03
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I don't think it implies they are perfect. I think it implies they are the right match for us. But I don't think anything is simple and sometimes fate (or whatever) intervines and you don't get to be with them.
I also don't nessecarily think there is only ONE - I think we have different ONES for different times in our lives. I am optomistic that way...
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Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 14:33:11
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Far be it from me to rely on the movies but as a wise man once said, "There can be only one."
OK, so that wasn't a lot of help...
Kind regards,
Dr. Simon
Specialist In Broken Hearts |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 14:43:04
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Splitting hairs perhaps, but I don't anyone is the right match for us. I think we should hope to find a good match and then work at keeping it good.
I know in marriages we're expected to believe that no one would be a better match than our spouse, but that's just crazy. There's 4 billion people on this plantet. One of them has to be a better match than our current spouse. (topic I won't be bringing up at dinner tonight) |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 15:53:02
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The question is what happens if you encounter one of those people, Darwin...
Do you say, well, I've made my bed, or do you run off?
I know my answer, but most people are selfish and will chase the greener grass all the way to the ocean.
 "When 5000 posts you reach / Look as good you will not, hmmm?" |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:03:07
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i still firmly believe in the concept of THE TWO
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:07:23
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the two? that's verging on the kinky
the room smelled like cupids gym
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:14:32
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the eight or so would be properly kinky, two is like, middle aged swingers kinky, or bi-curious kinky, kinky schminky.
Auntie chub likes it kinky darwin
( )
the room smelled like cupids gym
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:20:18
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Sorry, I deleted my kinky comment, because on reflection it seemed lame.
Aunt chub can't help but be kinky |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:24:24
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and now mine seems random
I look like a schiz
the room smelled like cupids gym
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:40:33
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quote:
Originally posted by Tre
the two? that's verging on the kinky
the room smelled like cupids gym
that depends on your point of view and/or religious beliefs.
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2004 : 16:59:57
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I was doing it from mine!
the room smelled like cupids gym
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 11:37:27
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
The question is what happens if you encounter one of those people, Darwin...
Do you say, well, I've made my bed, or do you run off?
I know my answer, but most people are selfish and will chase the greener grass all the way to the ocean.
"When 5000 posts you reach / Look as good you will not, hmmm?"
I was going to say exactly the same thing.
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Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 11:42:04
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I wrote about this boy on my blog today - along with some others like lovely Mereubu - but here is what I said in case anyone is curious what it IS about him -
Bob is a storm in a teacup.
He will always say my name when saying Hello, as if they are connected in his brain. They damn well might be. Bob has a huge heart, his friends write songs about him; they love him that much.
Bob likes to say things backwards. He has a Joke of the Season and if you haven’t heard it…don’t worry, you will.
Bob plays the drums. The kicky drumbeat is in his body, I can see it when he moves. He’s a bull in a china shop. He’s been referred to as “Loud Bob”. He might be a little bit deaf.
Bob was my boyfriend’s friend first. I was his girlfriends drinking buddy. Then Bob was my neighbor. Then he was something else. He will always be important to me, even if he has no idea. Bob makes me so mad. He doesn't get it. He's Boblivious.
He makes me laugh so hard.
Like me, Bob loves music. He loves words. Once, we read the dictionary. He said it was “fun!” He talks with implied exclamation points. Bob means what he says, even when he changes his mind a minute later. Bob is evasive as hell. He’s so damn endearing. He’ll give you a shout out. He’ll laugh at your jokes, and he means it. He’s never afraid to say what he thinks.
Bob rounds out the edges. He puts music in the pauses. He fills up the room.
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Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 11:47:53
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he sounds like he has a good heart
the room smelled like cupids gym
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 11:53:18
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You've made your bed and you try to make it a better bed.
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"The things that will destroy us are: politics without principle; pleasure without conscience; wealth without work; knowledge without character; business without morality; science without humanity,
and worship without sacrifice." |
Edited by - Carolynanna on 09/01/2004 12:11:05 |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 12:05:17
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
The question is what happens if you encounter one of those people, Darwin...
Do you say, well, I've made my bed, or do you run off?
Well, I don't have a good answer, but once one is in a committed relationship one should do all that they can do to not meet anyone new of the other sex. No more going out at night, you're just asking for trouble.
I say be an adult. Consider how your actions affect not only you but also others. What if switching partners made you a little happier, but really hurt your old partner or made life harder for kids? I say suck it up and do what's good for the group. <well that's all abstract bullshit that really would depend on the circumstance>, but I do think people need to be rational. Is that new person really that great? Are they really going to be so great once you get to know them? When is an unknown possibly great option better than the known good option? And hopefully relationships get better over time as you get to really know and appreciate each other. Why throw that away to start over? |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 12:16:04
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I don't know how it works, I had one 4 (5-ish) year relationship and in that time not anyone held even a lighter close, just couldn't see anyone else, it's why I don't get cheating, if you love someone enough to be with them why see someone else? I guess thats just me and I am a touch old fashioned in these matters
the room smelled like cupids gym
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 12:36:56
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quote:
Originally posted by Carolynanna
You've made your bed and you try to make it a better bed.
What does it mean?
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Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2004 : 13:22:57
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Boblivious! Brilliant!
He has no idea how lucky he is!
_________________________________________________________
Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 06:22:59
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Thank you. I try. The other one we often use it that I need a "lobobtomy".
_____________________________________________________________________
Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 07:58:47
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quote:
Originally posted by darwin
quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
The question is what happens if you encounter one of those people, Darwin...
Do you say, well, I've made my bed, or do you run off?
Well, I don't have a good answer, but once one is in a committed relationship one should do all that they can do to not meet anyone new of the other sex. No more going out at night, you're just asking for trouble.
I say be an adult. Consider how your actions affect not only you but also others. What if switching partners made you a little happier, but really hurt your old partner or made life harder for kids? I say suck it up and do what's good for the group. <well that's all abstract bullshit that really would depend on the circumstance>, but I do think people need to be rational. Is that new person really that great? Are they really going to be so great once you get to know them? When is an unknown possibly great option better than the known good option? And hopefully relationships get better over time as you get to really know and appreciate each other. Why throw that away to start over?
Well said... I suppose I do agree with all that, except maybe the no more going out at night, which may or may not have been in jest.
There is no easy answer, and it obviously depends on the situation, I suppose it was more a rhetorical question... if both parties are unhappy and there are no kids involved AND they've exhausted all means of resolution, then fine. I'm not saying cheat, I'm saying break it off and then start something with this other person if they mean that much to you. If there are kids involved, my opinion is you've sealed the deal, and unless your unhappiness is resulting in a really unstable home, suck it up and don't be selfish. New is always exciting, so maybe with the gloss of newness to this contender, (s)he is more exciting than your wife/husband, not to mention the mystery, challenge, and/or desire to see as many naked members of the opposite (or I guess sometimes same) sex as possible. But that will fade, and then you're left with a wife/husband again.
Greed is vicious, whether it's about money, power, or (wo)men. It inevitably hollows your insides and eats away at everything human and decent within you. Don't give in.
"When 5000 posts you reach / Look as good you will not, hmmm?" |
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ramona
"FB Quote Mistress"
USA
3988 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 08:00:32
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I don't think "new is exciting" - I think it is kind of tiring. Telling someone your whole story and learning theirs, blah blah blah. I think that knowing someone really well is exciting and being happy and comfortable with them...well, that is just icing.
Just my opinion though, of course.
_____________________________________________________________________
Never give up. You never know what will happen next. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 08:25:45
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new isn't exciting I want the old back
( )
the room smelled like cupids gym
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 08:33:26
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Maybe new is just exciting to guys then? Or to me?
Come on, what about that whole first kiss thing? Or the first time you hold hands? Or .. ?
Has Hollywood lied to me again?!
I do see your point, though, comfortable is good. I run into an ex every now and again and though it actually ended more horribly than anyone can imagine, when I talk with her it's so easy and I remember why we were together in the first place. I haven't met anyone like that yet, but don't tell her that... it'll go straight to her head.
"When 5000 posts you reach / Look as good you will not, hmmm?" |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 08:43:17
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every kiss with the old was like the first kiss.
heart flips and tummy flutters every time
()
the room smelled like cupids gym
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 09:00:59
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i agree with dean about new being exciting - sometimes i think back on all the time i've been with ms. broken face (nearly 7 years off and on) and i think about how there really is such a high comfort level there that sometimes i worry that i'm only still there for the comfort. and the family - i love her family. but i really do love her - that doesn't mean that new still doesn't look exciting from time to time. you know how your sig. other looks naked, you know what they do that drives you mad (both in a good and bad way), you know their favorite film, etc. sometimes its exciting to find a new person to learn about. its like reading a new book. but, most times, once the new-ness wears out, you're left with something that may not be as good as the stable, commited relationship. so basically, i am anti-cheating (even though once i cheated myself and i regret it every single day of my life) and pro-commitment. and i cook! i'm a catch!
-brian
 - "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 10:24:46
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
I haven't met anyone like that yet, but don't tell her that... it'll go straight to her head.
"When 5000 posts you reach / Look as good you will not, hmmm?"
How could we? Unless she is HERE!
Interesting, very interesting. Hmmmmmmm!
_________________________________________________________
Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 10:26:36
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quote:
Originally posted by Broken Face
i agree with dean about new being exciting - sometimes i think back on all the time i've been with ms. broken face (nearly 7 years off and on) and i think about how there really is such a high comfort level there that sometimes i worry that i'm only still there for the comfort. and the family - i love her family. but i really do love her - that doesn't mean that new still doesn't look exciting from time to time. you know how your sig. other looks naked, you know what they do that drives you mad (both in a good and bad way), you know their favorite film, etc. sometimes its exciting to find a new person to learn about. its like reading a new book. but, most times, once the new-ness wears out, you're left with something that may not be as good as the stable, commited relationship. so basically, i am anti-cheating (even though once i cheated myself and i regret it every single day of my life) and pro-commitment. and i cook! i'm a catch!
-brian
- "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
You are not married and yet you both have the same surname of Broken Face? It's fate man, don't let her go!
_________________________________________________________
Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2004 : 10:45:58
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Hahaha, lol.
She's not here, but one time she asked me, "So what's this Cult of Frank business?" meaning she somehow stumbled upon me here... this was a good two years after we split ways.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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stupid heart
