-= Frank Black Forum =-
-= Frank Black Forum =-
Home | Profile | Register | Active Topics | Members | Search | FAQ
Username:
Password:
Save Password
Forgot your Password?

 All Forums
 Off Topic!
 General Chat
 How Long Should It Take?
 New Topic  Topic Locked
 Printer Friendly
Author Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  01:57:34  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
I think sex is best right after eating, just before sleeping, and shouldn't take over a minute or two. There's nothing worse than having a girl try to cuddle just after I finish and am trying to get to sleep.

cindy lou
- FB Fan -

141 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  02:08:39  Show Profile
good stuff!!!
Go to Top of Page

El Barto
= Song DB Master =

USA
4020 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  06:32:11  Show Profile  Visit El Barto's Homepage
When's the last time you got laid? heh


"Join the Cult of Brit / And let your oral hygiene go out the window."
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  08:02:06  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
quote:
Originally posted by El Barto

When's the last time you got laid? heh


"Join the Cult of Brit / And let your oral hygiene go out the window."



Last night. Barely woke her up. Didn't take more than minute.
These modern women have men brainwashed and P-whipped into thinking you're supposed to satisfy them too. That's CRAZY. It could take an hour and still not happen.


Go to Top of Page

bumblebeeboy2
> Teenager of the Year <

United Kingdom
2638 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  08:10:29  Show Profile  Click to see bumblebeeboy2's MSN Messenger address
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

quote:
Originally posted by El Barto

When's the last time you got laid? heh


"Join the Cult of Brit / And let your oral hygiene go out the window."



Last night. Barely woke her up. Didn't take more than minute.
These modern women have men brainwashed and P-whipped into thinking you're supposed to satisfy them too. That's CRAZY. It could take an hour and still not happen.






lol! now you come to mention it... you do have a point...




"Join the Cult of Orange Cat / the more the better!"
Go to Top of Page

Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

Canada
6556 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  09:17:38  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

[quote]Originally posted by El Barto

It could take an hour and still not happen.




Then you're not doing it right maddawg.
Go to Top of Page

apl4eris
~ Abstract Brain ~

USA
4800 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  09:59:54  Show Profile  Visit apl4eris's Homepage
It's got to be all that ugly silver jewelry weighing him down, like in "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka". Dawg don't have the moves to please a flea.


666 Dunkin' Donuts, a 20-inch veggie pizza from Gumby's, extra jalapenos on the side. And a case of Asahi Dry -
Go to Top of Page

apl4eris
~ Abstract Brain ~

USA
4800 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  10:17:41  Show Profile  Visit apl4eris's Homepage
Don't blame me - this site is friggin' possessed. Watch out for the spinning heads and spewing split pea soup.

edit: Hey now, that's not nice, glaish! Where'd your post go, ya sstinker?!

666 Dunkin' Donuts, a 20-inch veggie pizza from Gumby's, extra jalapenos on the side. And a case of Asahi Dry -

Edited by - apl4eris on 02/20/2004 10:19:13
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  11:12:45  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.
Go to Top of Page

mrgrieves1971
= Cult of Ray =

USA
544 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  11:50:14  Show Profile
If it's over quick and she's not satisfied, just tell her "Hey, we started at the same time. It's not my fault you can't keep up."
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  11:58:31  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.



Joking aside though, there are actually guys who think like this!!!

Lo! I have become death!
Stealer of pie!!!
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  12:00:37  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.



Joking aside though, there are actually guys who think like this!!!

Lo! I have become death!
Stealer of pie!!!
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  12:23:37  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
quote:
Originally posted by Homers_pet_monkey

quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.



Joking aside though, there are actually guys who think like this!!!

Lo! I have become death!
Stealer of pie!!!



What the heck are you talking about?!?!?!?!?!
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/20/2004 :  12:39:58  Show Profile
And there lies the problem!!!

Lo! I have become death!
Stealer of pie!!!
Go to Top of Page

GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile

3575 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2004 :  12:35:32  Show Profile  Visit GypsyDeath's Homepage
hmm, well when she says shes seeing her shrink, she is probably fucking some guy that can last more than 15 minutes, and actually satisfy her.

I know i would be if i were her, actually, if i were her, i wouldnt be with a guy that wears such jewellery.



Boys go to Jupiter, Get more stupider,
Girls go to Mars, Become rock stars

Wanna fuck and fight in the basement?
Go to Top of Page

Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~

Spain
2673 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2004 :  12:54:12  Show Profile  Click to see Newo's MSN Messenger address
quote:
Mad Dawg Posted - 02/20/2004 : 11:12:45
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.


Hey don't knock muffin diving. I'd walk around wearing someone like a feedbag if I could.

--
"You one of those right wing nut outfits?" inquired the diplomatic Metzger.
Fallopian twinkled. "They accuse us of being paranoids."
"They?" inquired Metzger, twinkling also.
"Us?" asked Oedipa.
Go to Top of Page

GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile

3575 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2004 :  13:59:31  Show Profile  Visit GypsyDeath's Homepage
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg


The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.



I just saw my whole past, presence and future flash before my eyes.

I have a life ahead of me of unmotivated, lazy, musicians sponging off me!



Boys go to Jupiter, Get more stupider,
Girls go to Mars, Become rock stars

Wanna fuck and fight in the basement?
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2004 :  15:07:07  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Newo

quote:
Mad Dawg Posted - 02/20/2004 : 11:12:45
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My relationship is perfect. I work hard and give her (most of) the money (I have a secret stash for my silver fetish). There is always something to eat when I get home. She washes irons,folds,hangs my clothes. The house is spotless. If she's in a bad mood she goes to the shrink when I'm at work so I don't have to hear about it when I get home. Best of all she NEVER says no, she has a headache or any of that chit

Guys get into trouble when they don't make enough to support their women or get in a relationship with a liberated women that has business or other goals. The best thing for a musician that sucks and can't make a living off his music is to find a chick with a good job that is a "caretaker" personality type. Of course there's no self esteem in it for the dude but if he drinks enough beer and smokes enough dope, he won't get too depressed. Heck, enough Vodka and he'll even be able to stomach his own music. At the very least, he won't have to sleep under a bridge or at him Moms.

On the downside, he'll probably have to engage in more than a comfortable amount of muffin diving
if he expects to get it wet once in a while.


Hey don't knock muffin diving. I'd walk around wearing someone like a feedbag if I could.

--
"You one of those right wing nut outfits?" inquired the diplomatic Metzger.
Fallopian twinkled. "They accuse us of being paranoids."
"They?" inquired Metzger, twinkling also.
"Us?" asked Oedipa.




I hear ya Nemo, I hear ya!!!

That's some good shit right there brother!!!

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2004 :  21:53:31  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
quote:
Originally posted by GypsyDeath

hmm, well when she says shes seeing her shrink, she is probably fucking some guy that can last more than 15 minutes, and actually satisfy her.

I know i would be if i were her, actually, if i were her, i wouldnt be with a guy that wears such jewellery.



Boys go to Jupiter, Get more stupider,
Girls go to Mars, Become rock stars

Wanna fuck and fight in the basement?



"Can last more then 15 minutes." ?!?!?!? I could if I wanted to but why? I've been practicing for years and have it down to a science.
It was AWFUL being young and having to work at it so hard.
Go to Top of Page

gracie
= Cult of Ray =

United Kingdom
573 Posts

Posted - 02/22/2004 :  06:04:12  Show Profile
Do mean that the intercourse alone is 15 minutes or the whole thing (foreplay included) takes 15 minutes?

Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  01:36:02  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
quote:
Originally posted by gracie

Do mean that the intercourse alone is 15 minutes or the whole thing (foreplay included) takes 15 minutes?



That would depend if I sneak up behind her when shes doing laundry, follow her into the ladies room when were out to dinner, or just roll over for a quickie in the middle of the night. On her birthday or valentines day I usually fiddle around a little first but it's pretty boring. If a guy tells you he likes that chit he's probably latent.
Go to Top of Page

benji
> Teenager of the Year <

New Zealand
3420 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  02:35:56  Show Profile  Visit benji's Homepage
as long as you both orgasm, who cares how long it lasts....


"I joined the Cult of Frank / I think that man deserves a DB!"
Go to Top of Page

Malax
* Dog in the Sand *

United Kingdom
1340 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  06:46:09  Show Profile
Whats the deal with all these topics. I used to go for hours when I first met my g/f I'd hold off just to give her more and stuff. A year on and sometimes I just can't be bothered, sounds bad but hey shes one of can't orgasm won't orgasm girls. She thinks cos she never has she never will, I've tried so hard to change her thinking but nope. Ah well fuck her. And that is what I'll do.



I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.

*Adapted By Carolynanna*
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  10:57:24  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
Malox, with age comes wisdom.
Go to Top of Page

Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

Canada
6556 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  11:01:30  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

quote:
Originally posted by gracie

Do mean that the intercourse alone is 15 minutes or the whole thing (foreplay included) takes 15 minutes?



That would depend if I sneak up behind her when shes doing laundry, follow her into the ladies room when were out to dinner, or just roll over for a quickie in the middle of the night. On her birthday or valentines day I usually fiddle around a little first but it's pretty boring. If a guy tells you he likes that chit he's probably latent.



Jesus Maddawg why don't you just bore a hole in the wall...
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  11:07:28  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Mad Dawg

Malox, with age comes wisdom.



And boredom no doubt. Ooh great, I've got all that to come yet!!! Maybe I should stay single!!!

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
Go to Top of Page

Malax
* Dog in the Sand *

United Kingdom
1340 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  14:22:48  Show Profile
Seems to be the trend Im afraid. If your anything like me you will stray but be unable to let go. Damned first relationships.



I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.

*Adapted By Carolynanna*
Go to Top of Page

El Barto
= Song DB Master =

USA
4020 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  14:27:07  Show Profile  Visit El Barto's Homepage
I can't help but wonder if MD is joking or is serious.


"Join the Cult of Brit / And let your oral hygiene go out the window."
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  14:43:24  Show Profile
No no he is serious. I hoped he was joking, but alas no, it would appear he is serious.

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  14:44:27  Show Profile
quote:
Originally posted by Malax

Seems to be the trend Im afraid. If your anything like me you will stray but be unable to let go. Damned first relationships.



I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.

*Adapted By Carolynanna*



Damn first relationships, damn them to hell!!!

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/23/2004 :  18:37:38  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
OK I was just joking. If there one thing I love it's going to a french movie with sub-titles and crying, then empathetically listening to stuff about hair, nails, fashion etc, then about an hour of heavy petting, then seeing how long I can keep from having an orgasm.
Go to Top of Page

Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =

United Kingdom
17125 Posts

Posted - 02/24/2004 :  10:56:03  Show Profile
Hehehe!!! You are even funnier when you are serious!!!

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
Go to Top of Page

Mad Dawg
- FB Fan -

USA
153 Posts

Posted - 02/25/2004 :  10:56:33  Show Profile  Visit Mad Dawg's Homepage
Whatever. All that is really important is the coolest skull rings are at
www.tonycreed.com

Edited by - Mad Dawg on 02/25/2004 10:57:21
Go to Top of Page
  Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  
 New Topic  Topic Locked
 Printer Friendly
Jump To:
-= Frank Black Forum =- © 2002-2020 Frank Black Fans, Inc. Go To Top Of Page
Snitz Forums 2000