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GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile
3575 Posts |
 Posted - 07/05/2004 : 06:37:54
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So, I cant remember where I heard this, but apparently the time when you lose your virginity - the way in which that happens will decide how you like sex for the rest of your life.
So like, if the lights were on, then you always like it with the lights on; position etc....
However, there is also the theory that Its not so much the sex, but your first partner, fisrt person you fall in love with which decide (even if sub consiously) what sort of person you will be rawn to for all of your subsequent relationships.
This I think has more weight to it. Even though i though I went for completely different guys each time, they are basically all the same. they have at least 3 of the same qualities.
1- Arrogant
2- Controlling
3- Liars
ok, so that could be every guy in the world, but theres a bunch of other things aswell. No matter how nice they seem at first, they all boil down to the same guy.
So do you think you go for the same person everytime? Do you look for the same sort of person? What was you first love like?
Just thought I'd throw that in there... |
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BLT
> Teenager of the Year <
South Sandwich Islands
4204 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 06:59:29
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| My wife (who I've been with for over 12 years) is nothing like the manipulative girl to whom I gave my virginity (or the several after her). Two women couldn't be more different. |
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GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile
3575 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:02:06
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Do you think you purposely chose some one who was an extreme opposite?
Maybe it depends on whether losing your virginity was a good experience, or not?
Just thought I'd throw that in there... |
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Malax
* Dog in the Sand *
United Kingdom
1340 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:22:25
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Im almost certain the girl to whom i lost my virginity to has no bearing on anything (I wrote the story out once on here, if you went to the trouble of reading it you will understand) however since my first love I've met a few girls and to be honest although looks wise they are different they are similar girls and Im set in my sexual ways it would seem to due to the openness I had with my first love. All very odd, but I suppose there hasn't been much time in between my first love and now so...
I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.
*Adapted By Carolynanna* |
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betty
= Cult of Ray =
USA
258 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:37:44
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hmmmmm.
early sexual experiences shaping the rest of one's life...
fuck, i hope not but think perhaps....
however i believe there can be a degree of maturity applied over time.
e.g. i was abused as a youngin. i delved into s&m. now i'm pretty much saving it for the good stuff. but i still like to be dominated in bed. a lot. ;)
warm wishes and fond regards,
betty |
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GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile
3575 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:41:50
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I think mines gone the other way. The guy I lsot my virginity too I was completely in love with. Its was fabulous. Loved it.
Where as now...well I dont neccesarily fall in love with someone before i have sex with them, so its different. However, the position whic i lost my virginity in is one of my favourites, and one i generally choose over all others. The lights were dimmed, which is how I like it, and music was on, which is what I prefer.
The only difference being the guy I lost it too was very sweet, and very gentle, where as now i prefer it hard and rough...
Just thought I'd throw that in there... |
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betty
= Cult of Ray =
USA
258 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:51:25
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i know what you mean, gypsy!
now, i'm not hitting on you here, but i saw your picture and you are lovely.
to elaborate, i don't seek people destructive in my "real life", where i am a powerful lady indeed. however whether its my history, or my nature, i love good men who are naughty in bed!
it actually took me a while to become okay with what really turns me on. that's progress. i think.
i guess i'm saying, you don't have to date liars to get fucked properly. good luck to you.
:)
warm wishes and fond regards,
betty |
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begeegs
- FB Fan -
United Kingdom
81 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:55:04
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I don't about this theory because this would signify that I enjoy not knowing
A. What my name was? (I was drunk)
B. What the person's name was?
C. Not knowing what the hell I was doing? (well no change there then....)
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benji
> Teenager of the Year <
New Zealand
3426 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 07:59:02
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i think there is an element of truth in what you say mel.
but only to an extent.
losing my virginity was pretty much a nonevent, but i was with the girl for 3 years and she definitey shaped the way i thought about relationships and sex, and initially what i was looking for in a woman....
but thats all gone now, and it seems such a long time ago when i thought that way.
i think it's important not to get caught up in stuff like that, but then again, you hardly realise it's actually occuring, and even harder to actually stop it from happening...
 You Know You Want To! |
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GypsyDeath
Zapped Profile
3575 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 08:00:48
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Heh, yeah, thanks Betty.
I dont think its that I go for liars, Its just that I dont think there are men who dont lie. meh. whatever, I dont care. Now I just go for who looks like they would be better in bed. hahahah. Im just kidding.
I know what you mean - good guys who are bad in bed. basically the same as me. But my good guys always turn bad. or do I subconsiously go for bad boys? hm, I thought i was through with that stage, but the more I think about it....
Just thought I'd throw that in there... |
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betty
= Cult of Ray =
USA
258 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 08:12:52
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this may sound cheesy, but it really is about loving yourself, but not in a codependant, hippy way.
you give yourself what you think you deserve.
if i have a mantra for loving myself lots, regardless all the stupid shit i've done to myself, its "i have EARNED compassion."
take me to mickey's liquor!
warm wishes and fond regards,
betty |
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Frog in the Sand
-+ Le premiere frog +-
France
2715 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 09:04:47
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quote:
Originally posted by GypsyDeath
So do you think you go for the same person everytime?
Yes - my girlfriend to be exact.
quote:
Do you look for the same sort of person?
Please see above.
quote:
What was you first love like?
Immature.
"Join the Friends of FB.net / and win your weight in cereals"  |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 09:53:54
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Oh I completely agree with this theory.
I'm just not sure I will be abducted by aliens again, so I am destined to remain alone forever.
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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 09:59:45
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Don't agree much with this, losing my virginity was with my first love it was a wonderfull and sweet lingering affair with candles and radiohead playing softly in the background...
But I am still very fond of the good hard fuck.
Maybe the prono glow from the lava lamp did it for me...
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 10:18:04
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quote:
Originally posted by Tre
Maybe the prono glow from the lava lamp did it for me...
Frank Black ate my Hamster
You should have gone with a porno glow then.
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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. |
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 10:18:14
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I think this depends on how much you lost yourself in the other person at the time.
If it was a rather basic affair with someone who you were not 'immersed' in or in love with, then you might not subconsiously seek it out again.
Really, though -i don't think the theory is sound. I think people seek out a certain type because of who they are internally, not so much that they're prepetually trying to get back to the 'first time' feeling. Seeking out abusive, arrogant, lying people may mean...well...I won't go into that for fear of seeming like an unsolicited armchair psychoanalyst. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 10:34:58
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I think my type might have changed a bit, Um I don't know... Oh thats tricky. There has always been a personality type that attracted me, that's never changed but physically I used to have a yen for androgenous uber indie types, which has shifted a bit because I find them all to be a touch pretentious now so, ick no!
And I hear this "women fall for jerks" thing all the time and I don't buy it, I just want to meet someone who I can have a good laugh with and won't make me feel like shit, someone relatively free of pretention and arrogance.
I think when we fall for someone they are a mr miss wonderfull, they may turn out to be twats and then we stick with them because we remember the good times. It's dumb but true and most of he time unavoidable.
damn our foolish hearts damn them
mmm porno glow.....
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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Jason
* Dog in the Sand *
1446 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 10:51:14
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Arrogant, controlling, and a liar describes the kind of guy most women gravitate to. Not ALL, but most. Though maybe not the liar part (most women aren't drawn to a man when they KNOW he's a liar, at least).
I think your idea of what's attractive goes back further than losing your virginity or your first love. I think it goes back to when you're a small child.
Me, I love all kinds of girls, but the ones I love most all look the same. They have long straight brown hair (usually past their shoulders) and really big eyes. I'm crazy about that look. Above all other looks (I tend to be less immediately interested in blondes or short-haired girls), it's my favorite. If you have long brown hair and an attractive face and body, I won't be able to think straight when you're around.
And the fact that MY MOTHER looked like that when she was young is not lost on me.
An old girlfriend of mine used to be very aroused by my chest hair and very hairy forearms. She was always touching it and wanting it against her, and she encouraged to me to leave my shirts more unbuttoned to show more of it. I saw a picture of her father once and he's a furry beast just like me. Which I thought was funny. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 11:01:13
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calling Dr Freud
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 11:55:38
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Tre...I think you're referring to Freud's theories with how the parents effect their children's sexual appetites?
Men will seek out women who look like their mothers.
Women will seek out men who act like their fathers.
This is all theory of course, but it's kinda creepy how often it happens.
"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 11:59:08
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yeah.
*shudder*
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:01:08
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No kidding! It's really scary! But I guess it makes sense. Men are more visually stimulated while women are more emotionally stimulated. I wish men were more like women and I'm sure most men wish women were more like men in that sense, haha.
"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic |
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Little Black Francis
> Teenager of the Year <
3648 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:04:06
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I guess there is some truth to this...
My 1st real (viringizer) girlfriend and I dated for a short time, about 6 months and she left me for someone else...
happens all the time...
I haven't had a girlfriend this year, so next time I do, I'll test this theory
nuotare? hehehahhahehehaha |
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:06:37
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Did she leave you for an asshole? Because if so..I feel your pain. Ouchness.
"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:07:45
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men like women with breasts and everything what an interesting concept....
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:08:39
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I'm not sure I'm entirely turned off by that concept
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:09:17
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Not all men. There are always exceptions. I try my very best not to be shallow.
"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:10:37
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Arrogant eh?
Damn.
Kind regards,
Simon
Admissions |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 12:12:07
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man breasts?
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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Opaque
= Cult of Ray =
USA
251 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 13:10:42
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I'm not sure that I am buying this one... and of course I certainly can't speak for anyone other than myself, but the things that I like now aren't even remotely on the same planet as "the first time." In fact, I might even go so far as to say that the "first time" I had sex wasn't the first time I had sex. If that makes any sense at all. The real sex came much later.
Hrmmm.
"My primitive words match my primitive heart..." - Mercury Rev |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 13:13:18
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only man breasts are making sense to me now... might go do an internet search. I'm sure there will be specialist sites.....
*dribbles*
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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Malax
* Dog in the Sand *
United Kingdom
1340 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 14:31:52
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I get you opaque. I kinda never really had a first time. The first time I placed my winkle in there it was over an done with (nothing to do with me) due to the circumstances pretty quick. The next time was a long time after and for the first 5 times or so with my then-g/f it was weird didn't feel right again probably due to it being on my living room floor and in my car. Weird times.
I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.
*Adapted By Carolynanna* |
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 14:37:32
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Tre, I think you're fixated.
Meatloaf in Fight Club comes to mind.
There - does that jar you back to reality?
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Now, THATS how you kill a fucking thread. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 14:54:57
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jolting right the fuck back thanks
*shudder*
Frank Black ate my Hamster
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 15:00:43
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There we go. Now, don't go venturing off into wierd fetish land unattended again or we'll have to take away your lollipop(s).
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I'm a grit. |
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pfeffa
= Cult of Ray =
Aruba
367 Posts |
Posted - 07/05/2004 : 19:05:54
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Maybe that explains the fur suits?
get your freon bingo here |
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Topic |
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1st Sexual Experience Decides Your Tastes Forever
