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 Gigantic: The story of Frank Black and the Pixies
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a guy in a rover
= Cult of Ray =

United Kingdom
535 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  11:34:47  Show Profile  Click to see a guy in a rover's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
Gigantic: The story of Frank Black and the Pixies by John Mendelssohn is by far and away the worst book I have ever read. Despite all the negative reviews and Frank himself even saying on this very site that the book was dogshit, I thought 'it cant be that bad' and managed to get my hands on a copy after tabling a £3 bid on ebay.
That was the worst £3 I have ever spent. Worse than the time I got £10 out of a cash machine and walked off without taking it (at least the sod that nicked it got some enjoyment from it). The book is so poorly written it's unbelievable, if this hack can get published, anyone can. The guy cant even construct a coherent scentence. And he editorializes way too much, most of the book is him spouting on about how fat Frank is or how shit his music is. If the guy doesn't like Frank, why write a biogrpahy of him? As for 'Vickys Story', a story about a fictional pixies fan that takes over every other chapter in the book, don't get me started. Who gives a fuck? What a load of fucking filler. The only good that has come out of me reading this book is that I know not to recommend it to anybody. If you're looking for a biography of Frank/The Pixies, read Fool the World.

Here are some quotes from Gigantic. Don't forget this book has been
published and people have paid money to read it:

By 1983, Charles was a freshman anthropology major at the University of Massachusetts, living in an on-campus dormitory (whose other inhabitants, including J Macsis, later of Dinosaur Jr. fame, already notable for his Cure-derived coiffure, were not delighted by the unusual pungency of his feet).

But all reservations fell by the wayside when they got out their guitars and begn to play 'In the Midnight Hour', which Charles was later said to have sung at his high school's senior prom. (If so, remarkable - first because he attended it in the first place [kids whose parents moved around a lot traditionally stayed alone at home and masturbated bitterly on prom night]).

Teenager of the Year, his second solo album is best left shrink wrapped, as it's all downhill after you've been amused by the photo of our unrepentantly rotund hero smirking like a beauty queen on the cover, with a fistful of roses and a tiara doing little to conceal that fortune's fair-haired boy was now losing his fair hair at an alarming rate.

But isn't there a vast middle ground between the sterile, prettified singing of perfumed pop singers and Charles' sounding, both here and on 'King and Queen of Siam' and 'Suffering', like a drunken knobhead who's managed to wrest the microphone away from the lead singer at some poor pub band's gig?

I could do on but I'd end up typing up the whole book...

So, to summarize, this book is fucking garbage. It deserves to be pulped.

A pig or a goat well, they wouldn’t let you be mistreated


[EDIT - Moved since reviews generally end up in the Making Noise section, though this review should really be in every area of fb.net :)]

Frog in the Sand
-+ Le premiere frog +-

France
2715 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  13:02:47  Show Profile  Visit Frog in the Sand's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Yeah, tar and feathers for Mendelssohn.

Fucking hypocrite.

http://forum.frankblack.net/topic.asp?ARCHIVE=true&TOPIC_ID=4547&SearchTerms=mendelssohn

-----
blackolero le only Frank Black / Pixies site 100% in français

Edited by - Frog in the Sand on 06/16/2006 14:23:09
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =

Canada
11687 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  13:27:47  Show Profile  Visit Cult_Of_Frank's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Cheers to Floop for spotting an imposter, I feel so used (even though I'm thankful that I did nothing for him other than offer to help where I could).


"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts."
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  14:26:39  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I haven't read it, but form everything I've heard, it sounds so ill informed and will fully abusive towards Frank, I quickly developed a total hatred of it and it's author!! I believe there's also a little fictional story in it, about a girl who's a Pixies fan. I mean, come on.

--------

"Leguman...Leguman!
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a guy in a rover
= Cult of Ray =

United Kingdom
535 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  14:51:08  Show Profile  Click to see a guy in a rover's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Frog in the Sand
http://forum.frankblack.net/topic.asp?ARCHIVE=true&TOPIC_ID=4547&SearchTerms=mendelssohn



Jesus. I didn't know he'd been on here scouring for information. He clearly did little to no research. You certainly had his number on that one Floop.

I'm beginning to think I could have done a better job writing this book. Just glad I didn't put any money directly into his pocket. When it arrived from the ebay seller it had an HMV sticker on it for £11.99. Someone was royally fleeced when they payed £11.99 for that piece of horseshit.

A pig or a goat well, they wouldn’t let you be mistreated

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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 06/16/2006 :  14:58:31  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I've flicked through it. There's a couple of pictures I hadn't seen before. Maybe that's the best thing about it!!

--------

"Leguman...Leguman!"
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~

Belize
5305 Posts

Posted - 06/18/2006 :  11:56:40  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
yeah, Gigantic is a gigantic sack of you know what. Fool the World is the one you want to by. That one is not only good, it is fun to read.
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Ziggy
* Dog in the Sand *

United Kingdom
2461 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2006 :  03:34:46  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
'Fool the World' is a fabulous book.
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2006 :  07:47:01  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Yeah, so many interesting things that pretty much any Pixies fan wouldn't have heard about...full of priceless info.

--------

"Leguman...Leguman!"
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mr.biscuitdoughhead
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1729 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2006 :  07:52:58  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I was just thinking of buying Fool The World a few days ago. Bought FMRM instead.

_________________________________________________________________________________________
I've got a hunger, twisting my stomach into knots...

Edited by - mr.biscuitdoughhead on 06/19/2006 07:53:47
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The Holiday Son
= Quote Accumulator =

France
2008 Posts

Posted - 06/19/2006 :  07:58:33  Show Profile  Visit The Holiday Son's Homepage  Reply with Quote
I agree about Fool the World. Just bought it last week and I've been enjoying it a lot.
Well worth its price.
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~

Belize
5305 Posts

Posted - 06/20/2006 :  19:44:56  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Fool the World is actually a lot better than I thought it would be (or ever thought it could be). I really couldn't put it down once I started reading it. It was also very reasonably priced than I thought it would be- about the price of a lunch. The writing is great, it's well ballanced and has tons of sources. It also has cool info that every collector would want about recordings, covers and what not.

Edited by - Daisy Girl on 06/20/2006 19:45:45
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =

Mexico
15297 Posts

Posted - 06/20/2006 :  19:46:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Daisy Girl
It was also very reasonably priced than I thought it would be- about the price of a lunch.



the price of a lunch at Del Taco?




"I don't have any money to buy new clothes and if they paid me to get some I'd probably buy more hoodies." - Mark Wainfur
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~

Belize
5305 Posts

Posted - 06/21/2006 :  05:48:57  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by floop

quote:
Originally posted by Daisy Girl
It was also very reasonably priced than I thought it would be- about the price of a lunch.



the price of a lunch at Del Taco?




"I don't have any money to buy new clothes and if they paid me to get some I'd probably buy more hoodies." - Mark Wainfur




I don't know del Taco. But if it's like Taco Bell, it's a little more expensive than Taco Bell. It's more like two lunches at Taco Bell.
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Jadyn50
- FB Fan -

Austria
5 Posts

Posted - 06/29/2006 :  20:29:53  Show Profile  Visit Jadyn50's Homepage  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Carl

I've flicked through it.


"through"? "through"???


Hostels Manchester
- Fargo florists
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 06/29/2006 :  22:15:07  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Yep. If you mean I haven't got the right to criticise it without reading it, I think there are fundamental things I know about it which make it redundant.


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Suicide_Samurai
= Cult of Ray =

United Kingdom
431 Posts

Posted - 06/29/2006 :  22:27:45  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I don't think he means anything. If you read his other posts he has some major problems with his English. It even crossed my mind that he might even be a joke account...

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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 06/30/2006 :  00:07:04  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Yeah. I gather there seems to be a football theme running through those posts...


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edbanky
= Cult of Ray =

Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
388 Posts

Posted - 06/30/2006 :  08:01:07  Show Profile  Visit edbanky's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Dude, I'm gonna write a book about Celine Dion, during the next two weeks, starting . . . . . . . now!

Chapter One:
It was the summer of 1982, when a young Celeste Marie Dionkowsi first stood in the meat-locker known as stage-right at the Miss Quebec Pageant, where she would share a stage with a who's who of the French Canadian neo-disco coed scene (in the audience was a young Natalie Marie Henstridgekowsi [better known to heterosexual males as Natasha Henstridge {not to be confused with Nastassia Kinski--daughter of one Klaus Kinski <the famed "best fiend" of director Werner Herzog |who, it is rumored, saved Joaquin Phoenix from the burning wreckage of his automobile in 2006|>} who is said to have been quoted as saying, "There was something about that knobby-kneed lady that--despite her perceptible halitosis--whispered to me: 'Star!'"), only to find disappointment at having to withdraw from competition when she was unable to coherently say the words "world peace" in either French or English.

. . .


"They, on average, die the same age."
Modulous
Member / Posts: 1541 /From: Manchester, UK / Registered: 05-01-2005
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edbanky
= Cult of Ray =

Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
388 Posts

Posted - 06/30/2006 :  08:03:13  Show Profile  Visit edbanky's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Wow, writing a biography is easy. I'm almost done. Just have to swing by CelineRox.com's forums for some last-minute fact-checking. Wish me luck. ;) LOL ROFLMAO WTF

-----

Instead of posting thrice consecutively, I'll add to this post . . .

It would be fun to basically share a single copy of this book. I am morbidly curious, as I'm sure are others--but I don't want to put money in the wrong pockets. It would be cool to have the book read by a few thousand FB fans, with our buddy Manglestein netting maybe a couple pennies on it.


"They, on average, die the same age."
Modulous
Member / Posts: 1541 /From: Manchester, UK / Registered: 05-01-2005

Edited by - edbanky on 06/30/2006 08:33:30
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -

Ireland
11546 Posts

Posted - 07/01/2006 :  09:11:03  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I'm gonna write a Frank bio with a story about a girl called Kim Deal in the middle. "There was once a girl from Ohio who moved to Boston to join a band....that band became....The Pixies!!"


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