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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~
Spain
2673 Posts |
 Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:48:49
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These are great, my French is a little rusty but I found these quotes by Jean Claude Van Damme who my flatmate tells me is famous in the Frenchspeaking world for homespun wisdoms that occasionally lapse onto English. I think they´re funny in a Monty Python kindof way. Here he is talking about peanuts and beer:
" J'adore les cacahuetes. Tu bois une biere et tu en as marre du gout. Alors tu manges des cacahuetes. Les cacahuetes c'est doux et salé, fort et tendre,comme une femme. Manger des cacahuetes, it's a really strong feeling. Et apres tu as de nouveau envie de boire de la bière. Les cacahuetes c'est le mouvement perpétuel à la portée de l'homme ".
"I love peanuts. You drink a beer and you in have marre du gout*. Then you eat peanuts. The peanuts are soft and salted, strong and tender, like a woman. Eat peanuts, they have really strong feeling. And after you have a craving to drink beer. The peanuts are the constant movement within reach of the man"
*Not sure what this means, tired of the taste maybe?
Lingerie:
"Dans les magasins de lingerie, on ne voit pas de calendriers avec des photos de garage."
"In lingerie stores, one does not see any calendars with garage photos."
Awareness:
"Y a des gens qui n'ont pas réussi parce qu'ils ne sont pas aware, ils ne sont pas "au courant". Ils ne sont pas à l'attention de savoir qu'ils existent. Les pauvres, ils savent pas. Il faut réveiller les gens. C'est-à-dire qu'y a des gens qui font leur travail, qui font leurs études, ils ont un diplôme, ils sont au contact tout ça. Tu as un rhume et tu fais toujours "snif". Faut que tu te mouches. Tu veux un mouchoir ? Alors y a des gens comme ça qui ne sont pas aware. Moi je suis aware tu vois, c'est un exemple, je suis aware."
"There are people that did not succeed because they are not aware, they are not "in the flow". They are not at attention to the knowledge that they exist. The poor people, they know not. It is necessary to awaken the people. That is to say that there are people that do their work, do their studies, they have a diploma, they are in touch with all that. You have a cold and you always do "sniff". It is necessary you to wipe yourself. You want a handkerchief? Then there are people like that that are not aware. Me I am aware you see, for example, I am aware."
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Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to corner the fish market and marvel at the small acts of philanthropy he commits while depriving most of the world of fish. |
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Monsieur
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1688 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:50:34
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yes, that's what it means
I will show you fear in a handful of dust |
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Monsieur
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1688 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:51:40
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There are much better JCVD's quotes. That man is a surrealist genius.
I will show you fear in a handful of dust |
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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~
Spain
2673 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:53:19
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there be more at http://www4.tz-technologie.com/
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Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to corner the fish market and marvel at the small acts of philanthropy he commits while depriving most of the world of fish. |
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7438 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:54:12
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Did you babelfish them? Strangely babelfish gives quite an accurate translation of JCVD's quotes. Yeah, he's super famous in France for this. You can buy books of JCVD quotes. It's hard to translate in English though, half the words of his sentences already are in english.
Denis
I know the god of rock n roll / Yeah I sold him my soul! |
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7438 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:56:36
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most of the quotes in your link are fake. I'll try to translate the real ones.
Denis
I know the god of rock n roll / Yeah I sold him my soul! |
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Frog in the Sand
-+ Le premiere frog +-
France
2715 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 04:58:10
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quote:
Originally posted by Newo
These are great, my French is a little rusty but I found these quotes by Jean Claude Van Damme who my flatmate tells me is famous in the Frenchspeaking world for homespun wisdoms that occasionally lapse onto English.
As far as I know, JC is primarily famous for his remarkably low IQ.
Join the Cult of France / And get Honeycomb weeks in advance |
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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~
Spain
2673 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 05:00:38
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No I didn´t but I´ll give it a go. I don´t understand why he follows his film scripts, the stuff he sez is so inane you´ve got the ingredients for a perfect kungfu movie.
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Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to corner the fish market and marvel at the small acts of philanthropy he commits while depriving most of the world of fish. |
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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~
Spain
2673 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 05:03:57
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I wonder what the Coen brothers would think of what he says, they seem to write a lot of low-watt bulbs who never shut up.
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Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to corner the fish market and marvel at the small acts of philanthropy he commits while depriving most of the world of fish. |
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jediroller
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1718 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 05:05:29
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Great translations !
He is indeed famous for those, I believe there are entire websites dedicated to his wise sayings. It's a bit like Bushisms, but better, because even conservatives can appreciate a good Van Damme quote.
"Je suis fascine par l'air. Si on enlevait l'air du ciel, tous les oiseaux tomberaient par terre....Et les avions aussi.... En même temps l'air tu peux pas le toucher...ça existe et ça existe pas...Ca nourrit l'homme sans qu'il ait faim...It's magic...L'air c'est beau en même temps tu peux pas levoir, c'est doux et tu peux pas le toucher... L'air c'est un peu comme mon cerveau..."
"I am fascinated by air. If you took air away, all the birds would fall to the floor... And the planes too... At the same time, you can't touch air, it exists and it doesn't... It feeds man without hunger... It's magic... Air is beautiful and at the same time you can't see it, it's soft and you can't touch it... Air is a bit like my brain..."
"Un biscuit, ça n'a pas de spirit, c'est juste un biscuit. Mais avant c'était du lait, des oeufs.Et dans les oeufs, il y a la vie potentielle."
"A cookie has no spirit, it's only a cookie. But before that, it was milk, eggs. And in eggs, there's potential life."
"A l'an 3000 les gens vont se parler avec... les yeux , des ondes.Ne me prends pas pour un fou, les baleines le font, les dauphins aussi.Ce sont des animaux très intelligents dans la mer.Nous on vit dans la terre.Et eux se communiquent, vu qu'ils ne savent pas parler dans l'eau, ils sont forcés d'utiliser des ondes, des ondes de loveou de hateet la communication se fait comme ça."
"In the year 3000 people will speak to each other with... the eyes, waves. Don't think I'm crazy, whales do it, dolphins too. They're very intelligent animals in the sea. We live in the earth. And them, they communicate, since they can't speak underwater, they have to use waves, waves of love or hate, and communication happens that way."
(I saw him deliver that one on TV, I seem to remember he actually mimed trying to talk underwater to emphasise his point.)
I jumped on the Frank Black Bandwagon/'Cause Pixies are so 2004 |
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7438 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 05:17:06
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"Air is made of CO2 oxygen"
"I don't believe anymore in Adam and Eve, you know, cause I'm not stupid: apples can't be bad, they're full of pectin..."
"If you invite people who all have the same blood type to a party, but you don't tell them, they'll talk about something else"
"I don't mind appearing naked from behind but from front, that's another story, I wouldn't want to lose all my fans."
"Between you and me there's a product called a product, and it's a product called oxygen, so if you do this (inspire/expire) like this, you live, but if I kill oxygen like on the Moon, you die!"
"Life is something very strong and beautiful... Life belongs to all the living. It's both a dream and a feeling. It's being what we aren't without staying it. Life is also to die... And dying is really strong... it's staying alive beyond death... All those who are dead don't ignore that they know it."
"We don't have the same perception of time depending on the species, it's what makes that I can pass my hand between you and me like this, cause for oxygen, a second is maybe ten seconds, and for concrete, a second might be a thousandth of a second..."
Denis
I know the god of rock n roll / Yeah I sold him my soul! |
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jediroller
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1718 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 05:22:00
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I love the blood type one. Real deep.
I jumped on the Frank Black Bandwagon/'Cause Pixies are so 2004 |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 06:41:59
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Brilliant stuff. The man is clearly a genius.
Don't believe the type!
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 11:45:27
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That's coz he's Belgian. Born in my mom's hometown of Brussels.
Sometimes, no matter how shitty things get, you have to just do a little dance. - Frank
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 11:57:20
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quote:
Originally posted by jediroller
I love the blood type one. Real deep.
I jumped on the Frank Black Bandwagon/'Cause Pixies are so 2004
It's just beautiful, I feel a new signature coming on
and you're questioning the sciences
and questioning religion
you're looking like an idiot
and you no longer care.
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 12:04:39
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check it, I've been JCVD'd, I never realised he was so *special* before
If you invite people who all have the same blood type to a party, but you don't tell them, they'll talk about something else
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The Marsist
= Cult of Ray =
Ireland
730 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 12:33:30
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iv been debating with myself all day whether or not to come into this thread cause i thought it was about jesus. how wrong i was
"To be known as an underdog - that can only be a good thing. It's better than sucking."
- Frank Black
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jediroller
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1718 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 14:15:03
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Why are you afraid of Jesus, my son?
I jumped on the Frank Black Bandwagon/'Cause Pixies are so 2004 |
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The Marsist
= Cult of Ray =
Ireland
730 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 14:23:01
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im not afraid of jesus (in fact im a believer)its just the whole catholic church thing doesnt sit well with me and i was expecting a debate (or when it comes to jesus an argument )
"To be known as an underdog - that can only be a good thing. It's better than sucking."
- Frank Black
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jediroller
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1718 Posts |
Posted - 07/28/2005 : 23:18:46
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Nevermind, I was only being silly.
You're right though, you just can't have a debate about Jean-Claude. He's undebatable.
I jumped on the Frank Black Bandwagon/'Cause Pixies are so 2004 |
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Carl
- A 'Fifth' Catholic -
Ireland
11546 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2005 : 00:00:29
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He's the thinking man's action movie star!! |
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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~
Spain
2673 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2005 : 04:12:30
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He´s my new hero, after Thomas Pynchon and the guy who invented those bottle lids with a little sharksfin on the underside you can use to perforate the seal with a little twist.
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Les cacahuetes c'est le mouvement perpétuel à la portée de l'homme . |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2005 : 10:50:53
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and here i thought this was going to be about the JC, Jennifer Connelly
pictured here:
<image removed>
does she not have the most perfect [comments removed]?? i would seriously enjoy [comments removed] and [comments removed], nor would i scoff at the chance to [comments removed] ..
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Edited by - floop on 07/29/2005 10:54:29 |
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7438 Posts |
Posted - 07/29/2005 : 10:53:17
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Yeah, and her ass ain't bad either!
Denis
I know the god of rock n roll / Yeah I sold him my soul! |
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JC
