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apl4eris
~ Abstract Brain ~
USA
4800 Posts |
 Posted - 04/11/2005 : 13:57:17
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quote:
Originally posted by speedy_m
! :: No cast. Just a wimpy tensor bandage and a severe limp. I took the crutches back today. Cumbersome. No more sympathy for me, just strange looks at my awkward gait.
Go get them back.
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@ :: It's all I can do to muster pleasantries or a nod of recognition with her, let alone write haikus on napkins for her.
Just sign them: "Not me"
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# :: I don't usually eat there (it's a pub), and when I do, it's rarely food one can arrange to make smiley faces.
Do they have peanuts? She'll have to spend a lot of time admiring your art cleaning those up off the bar.
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$ :: I don't know origami.
What rita said.
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% :: She lives here. Chances she'll stay at a hotel I randomly choose: slim. Though that would confirm that we were meant to be, I suppose. Looks like it's back to askmen.com...
The answer is obvious. You're going to have to kidnap her and take her to the hotel room, take a shower while she's tied up in the bedroom, then show her the mirror.
We smoke while we flip the bird. |
Edited by - apl4eris on 04/11/2005 14:00:51 |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:05:12
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quote:
Originally posted by floop
meeting girls in bars is generally pretty dreadful (whether they're bartenders or not).. in my experience anyway.
i think this town worse than most too (that's my excuse anyway)
know what i'm sayin' dawg?
I agree with ya, dawg. I hate the meat-market mentality in pubs and clubs and bars here, where it seems like the sole purpose of a night out is to get laid. Not for me it ain't.
It's not that I'm bitter and frustrated. At all.
 I'm like a lost snail in the night. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:12:29
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Bitter and frustrated men of the world unite!
Ducking for apples - change one letter and it's the story of my life
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:17:13
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anything you say to a girl at a bar is automatically viewed as a cheesy line, even if it's not a cheesy line, or not a line at all.. i've been at bars before where i've actually just made harmless conversation to someone next to me while ordering a drink, and gotten major attitude. it's like, "i'm not even interested in you. i'm just making some conversation here.. relax," which is what i say, but that doesn't seem to help. and then i say, "trust me, you're not my type. way too fat" and that seems to smooth everything over
know what i'm sayin' dawg? |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:18:57
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Yeah, if you run into a girl you think you know, don't ask her...
 "I joined the Cult of Frank / Wooteenie!" |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:22:11
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quote:
Originally posted by floop
anything you say to a girl at a bar is automatically viewed as a cheesy line, even if it's not a cheesy line, or not a line at all.. i've been at bars before where i've actually just made harmless conversation to someone next to me while ordering a drink, and gotten major attitude. it's like, "i'm not even interested in you. i'm just making some conversation here.. relax," which is what i say, but that doesn't seem to help. and then i say, "trust me, you're not my type. way too fat" and that seems to smooth everything over
know what i'm sayin' dawg?
Another classic floop moment!
I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:24:09
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even, "do you know where the bathroom is?" comes across as sleezy.
or, "my friend is choking to death, does anyone know the heimlich maneuver?"
know what i'm sayin' dawg? |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:24:52
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I think that as this is the twenty-first century, cheesy chat-up lines shouldn't be limited to men. I wouldn't object to being chatted up by a girl, whether she was attractive or not, it all boosts confidence.
But old-fashioned as we are, it's down to the chaps. I've never talked to a strange woman in a bar or anything with the intention of making a move, I just think it's kind of tacky. Plus I don't have the guts.
"So Simon, are you single?"
"Well, now that you mention it..."
I'm like a lost snail in the night. |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:27:44
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unless a conversation comes about naturally, it's really cheesy and painful (and tacky) to be all blatant. but then, nice guys always finish last. thank god or alcohol
know what i'm sayin' dawg? |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:32:35
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In my experience women do OCCASIONALLY chat up men, but they are shit at delivering a deal clincher. They just kind of chat, with no real sense of purpose. You can tell they are waiting for you to make the next move. So even when they approach you, they still expect you to do all the real work.
That doesn't include the really 'loose' women who tell you within minutes that they want to "**** your ****". I didn't include them 'cos I have never met one. I have heard of them though, in stories my grandad used to tell me.
I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:36:41
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your grandad was the mac
know what i'm sayin' dawg? |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:42:31
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Well he did deal 'in tosh'!
“Did I leave the gas on? No! I’m – no – I’m a fucking squirrel!”
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:46:21
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there's an advert on and this guy always gives this girl a chocolate with a little poem or love note or whatever written in it, start leaving those as tips! It works in the advert and why would TV lie?
Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something. |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:48:34
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chicks dig scars. maybe you should gouge your face with a steak knife and let it heal.. then, sit back and let the phone numbers pile up
know what i'm sayin' dawg? |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 14:49:34
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Gouge Away.
“Did I leave the gas on? No! I’m – no – I’m a fucking squirrel!”
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2005 : 18:15:36
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i was in a bar tonight and the bartender was super cute but she did two things that really annoy me: a) she went out of her way to flirt with me - this might seem odd, but this seems like tip grubbing. and i'm not an attractive man, i was a guy keeping to himself eating his dinner and drinking in his mets cap, so its not like i was hinting for it.
b) she then tried to make awkard baseball conversation with me. i'm a snob about 2 things: music and baseball. this is why i don't talk music with coworkers or even some friends. if you don't know what your'e talking about, don't pretend to. its just obnoxious.
-Brian
If you move I shoots!
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The Waitress Pick Up
