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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
 Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:11:29
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so today i was going to the bank, and on my way out, i spotted out of the corner of my eye a gumball machine in the local blockbuster video. This should have been my frist clue to stay away, but who am i to listen to reason?
i go inside, place my quarter in the slot as the clerk is staring at me literally slack jawed - his mouth was wide open as if no one has ever bought a gumball from there. after this experience, i now know why.
so, the ball starts its descent - sour apple, yes! of all the flavors in this machine, i was hoping for either a sour apple or a blue one (blueberry? blue raspberry? do i care?). so, i take the ball out of the metal dealy and place it in my mouth.
briefly i thought "man it would suck to swallow one of these." luckily that tragedy didn't befall me, but one surely did.
so i bit into this gumball, and it exploded into roughly a dozen SHARP pieces. enough for me to say "ow!" and spit them into my hand. this gumball was apparently 100% hollow, and therefore cracked like a ceramic golfball in my mouth.
(by the by, i have never bitten a ceramic golfball, i am just assuming)
so, i place all the pieces, one by one back in my mouth and mash them into a workable piece of gum. and for about 10 seconds it was quite flavorful. then it died. it became work to chew this flavorless chunk of goo, so i spit it out.
worst two bits i ever spent.
-Brian
If you move I shoots!
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:19:21
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ball in the machine!
 I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:44:24
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Sometimes this world makes me wanna puke!
My God, my God! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US!
Love, love, my season |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:47:37
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was it one of the ones where the gumball comes spiralling down that long slide thing?
on a semi-related note: you know those video games where you try to win stuffed animals? (they usually always have them at Denny's or similar 24 hour diner type places).. does anyone ever actually win an animal out of those? i've tried, my whole life, and never gotten one.
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:51:32
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You americans have such weird things...I'm glad to know that here can't get that!
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:55:10
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quote:
Originally posted by Homers_pet_monkey
Sometimes this world makes me wanna puke!
WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US!
Love, love, my season
and now I have SOAD chop suey in my head.
whats a gumball?
and i love those machines, i'm allergic to most jewelery so either wear glass/plastic jewelery or the 20p ones you get in eggs in those machines. there used to be a superb machine outside a papershop in bangor, i got some cracking 'pieces' from there
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:58:16
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quote:
Originally posted by rita
You americans have such weird things...I'm glad to know that here can't get that!
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings
you don't have games where you can win cheap stuffed animals by maneuvering an animatronic arm?
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:00:32
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That is better explained, but you said "Video games". And I actually won a lot of them, they were awful, but you know, kids liked it!
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:03:01
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i guess they're kind of like video games.
yeah, they always have the WORST stuffed animals in there. but i still want to win, just because i'm competitive (with machines).. and, usually when i'm in Denny's it's 2:30am and i'm drunk, and not thinking reasonably
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:03:23
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the trick is with the animal machine is to get a parent or a partner to do it for you - and to avoid the ones that are either too heavy or too close to another one because they are probably stuck down.
my dad always won me good ones, i got an ace winnie the pooh in torquay for my 18th birthday (that was an excellent weekend away - on the pier in october eating mint choc chip ice cream with my pooh bear before we all went to get hammered in the cider press) and in north wales at the popular (!) holiday resort (!) of llandudno there was a plentifull supply of those machines, i tried to make people win me a bagpuss but only my ex ever got a toy out of them and then it was a crappy pokemon one which was the ugliest thing in the whole machine.
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:05:12
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quote:
Originally posted by floop
i guess they're kind of like video games.
yeah, they always have the WORST stuffed animals in there. but i still want to win, just because i'm competitive (with machines).. and, usually when i'm in Denny's it's 2:30am and i'm drunk, and not thinking reasonably
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee!
I can teach you if you want, you learn fast!
First step - Don't be drunk!
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:12:19
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i think they're rigged so you'll only win if you're trying to win one for a kid. or, if you are a kid. the machine actually has sympathy.
if you're a drunken belligerent asshole, it's a no go.
teach me rita. teach me the secret.
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:14:38
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quote:
Originally posted by starmekitten
[only my ex ever got a toy out of them and then it was a crappy pokemon one which was the ugliest thing in the whole machine.
no wonder he's your ex
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:14:47
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I'll teach you, but if it is a secret, how can I?
second step - be patiente, breath in and breath out slowly before you start
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:21:19
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eu no tenho nenhuma pacincia
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:25:15
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Paciência floop.
Eu tambem não...mas tens que aprender!
We have the answer to all your fears
It's short, it's simple, it's crystal dear
It's round about, it's somewhere here
Lost amongst our winnings |
Edited by - n/a on 02/06/2005 16:21:47 |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:30:24
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Yeah I have won at those machines a few times. The trick is to watch someone else play it first, to see if the claw is a good one. Most are shit, slackened off by the owner so that you don't win. If it's a good one (ie it closes properly and appears to have some degree of strength), then it really isn't too hard. As Kitty said, don't go for ones that are packed in too tight, and look for good parts to grab. the head is a good one 'cos there is usually a lot of weight in it. You don't want the weight to be farthest from the claw, but within it.
Also make sure you only play the ones with good prizes, such as Muppets or Sesame Street Characters. There is no point in going for a faded 2 headed clown in a pink dress (unless that's your bag).
Love, love, my season |
Edited by - Homers_pet_monkey on 02/06/2005 15:30:52 |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:33:43
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quote:
Originally posted by Homers_pet_monkey
There is no point in going for a faded 2 headed clown in a pink dress
yeah, speak for yourself
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:38:37
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Floop? You never dissapoint.
Love, love, my season |
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VoVat
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
9168 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 16:18:27
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quote:
whats a gumball?
Um, it's a ball. Made of gum. Am I moving too fast for you? :P
I've seen people win things at the claw machines, but I've never done so myself.
"Reunion? Shit union!" |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 17:00:33
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don't think a cheeky little sticky outy tonguey thingy will allow you to escape my wrath mister VoVat man!
ok it did.
Mikey, go win me a toy! pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!
The last person who won me a toy won me a tiger at a fair before christmas, which I was quite excited about because there were some cute tigers in the mix, I was going to call it hobbes (original huh) and put it on my bookshelf but I ended up with this shiny weird material tiger with wonky eyes so it lives behind my guitar.
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 17:26:46
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What toy do you want?
Love, love, my season |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 18:05:23
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a steve mcqueen action figure
failing that something elephant shaped.
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 18:34:35
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a - a gumball is a piece of gum in a spherical shape
b- yes it did come down a long spiral slide
c - i won ONE thing in those machines in 22+ years of life
-Brian
If you move I shoots!
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 19:00:41
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what did you win? was it a good thing or a sucky thing?
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Sir Rockabye
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1158 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 19:06:02
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I think the worst gumball I've ever eaten was the gumball that said "Prize" on it. On the gumball machine there was a piece of paper claiming that if you got a gumball that said prize on it, you would recieve a free gumball. The guy at the video store wouldn't give me the free gumball. And then, the free one tasted like garbage. It didn't have any specific flavor that I can remember.
I also just realized that I think every gumball that I have ever purchased has been at a video store.
I will never say the word procrastinate again, I'll never see myself in the mirror with my eyes closed. |
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 19:26:42
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i won a cute doll i gave to m'lady
-Brian
If you move I shoots!
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 21:06:47
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quote:
Originally posted by Sir Rockabye
The guy at the video store wouldn't give me the free gumball. And then, the free one tasted like garbage.
wait, i thought he wouldn't give you a free gumball. i'm thoroughly confused
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <
Canada
4307 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 00:00:43
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at my local videostore they have a gumball machine like that except there a few black gumballs (licorice maybe?) and if you get one of those you get a free rental.
i once won two things in one go with the claw machine, a cool powerpuff girls toy and a crappy doll that got it's plastic hair stuck on the claw and ended up dragging the powerpuff girl to the drop, it was cool so i put in another loonie to see if i could win again but didn't.
Rat: do you have any regrets?
Pig: no, but i had a parrot once
Rat: that made absolutely no sense
Pig: well, it made sense to me until i learned he couldn't talk
Rat: i wish you couldn't talk
Pig: you would've liked my parrot |
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <
Canada
4307 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 00:02:18
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oh wait, more on gumballs...
i think i had the worst gumball of all time, i was about 4 or 5 and my sister gave me a gumball and i tried to bite it and broke a tooth, it turned out to be a gobstopper. |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 08:51:42
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has anyone ever seen a Steve McQueen doll in one of those?
has anyone ever seen a Steve McQueen doll?
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 09:39:30
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Only a picture of one. Some fruit loop posted it on this forum.
Love, love, my season |
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n/a
deleted
4109 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 09:53:14
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quote:
Originally posted by Broken Face
a - a gumball is a piece of gum in a spherical shape
b- yes it did come down a long spiral slide
c - i won ONE thing in those machines in 22+ years of life
-Brian
If you move I shoots!
Keep on trying Brian, you're still too young, you'll win more!
So this is for when you're feeling happy again
And this is for when you're feeling sad
And this is for when you feel...
Something
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Sir Rockabye
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1158 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 12:11:53
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quote:
Originally posted by floop
quote:
Originally posted by Sir Rockabye
The guy at the video store wouldn't give me the free gumball. And then, the free one tasted like garbage.
wait, i thought he wouldn't give you a free gumball. i'm thoroughly confused
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee!
I think what I meant to say was that a) I didn't recive the free gumball and b) the one that was supposed to redeem me the free gumball wasn't very good. I'm sorry if in my gumball induced rage I came across incoherently.
I will never say the word procrastinate again, I'll never see myself in the mirror with my eyes closed. |
Edited by - Sir Rockabye on 02/07/2005 12:12:35 |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 12:15:48
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thanks for clearing that up Sir Rock. i was tossing and turning in my sleep last night..
"free gumball.. sir rock.. how???"
i think i'll rest better now
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 12:17:46
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(everytime i read this thread i see gumball as cumball, where's that other thread gone)
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the worst gumball of all time
