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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
 Posted - 02/05/2005 : 02:48:46
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Much to my dismay, I just recieved this email. Apparently one of my "friends" think they are funny. I love a good practicle joke, but this goes to far! There is going to be hell to pay when I track down this SOB!
IFrom: noreply@starandal.com
Date: Fri Feb 4, 2005 17:27:48 US/Pacific
Subject: A message from StarandAl.com
Hello Friends!
We are so happy to tell you that the response to the Golden Globes "Clothes Off Our Back" charity auction was magnificent! The organization, the stars who participated and the fans that supported the auction really gave it their all and the money raised for UNICEF will certainly go to a wonderful cause. So thank you from the bottom of our hearts!
Please allow us to also invite you to join Star Jones Reynolds at this year's Screen Actors Guild Awards, as the new queen of the red carpet again is the "Hostess with the Mostess". You know that Star will get the scoop from the biggest names to hit the ruby runway: Jamie Foxx, Leonardo DiCaprio, Hilary Swank, Charlize Theron, Teri Hatcher and more will be on hand, along with the rest of Hollywood's elite, as they salute their own.
Catch three exciting hours of red-hot red carpet action, as the dolled-up thespians strut their stuff at L.A.'s Shrine Exposition Center. See who's ready to party and, most important, what they're wearing, when we bring you a day of glitz, glamour and gab with Live from the Red Carpet: The 2005 Screen Actors Guild Awards, Sat., Feb. 5, at 5 p.m. ET/PT.
To see this ultimate warm-up to the biggest actors' action of the year--um, Oscars, hello?--make sure you stick with E! and Star!
This is a wonderful and exciting year for us...we hope that life is good for you also!
Best regards,
Al & Star Reynolds
To be removed from this list click on the link below:
http://www.starandal.com/removeemail.cfm
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 03:20:32
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But KoK! You get to see who's ready to party and, most important (let's not forget that), what they're wearing.
Love, love, my season |
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ObfuscateByWill
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1887 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 03:57:46
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I used to sign my eBay buyers up for newsletters.
 Take a bite of the chocolate coffin. |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 04:01:08
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Why?
Love, love, my season |
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ObfuscateByWill
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1887 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 04:57:25
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I don't know.
Take a bite of the chocolate coffin. |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 08:39:22
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quote:
Originally posted by ObfuscateByWill
I used to sign my eBay buyers up for newsletters.
Take a bite of the chocolate coffin.
Genius
I'd be safe and warm if I was in L.A
California Dreamin' on such a winter's day
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 08:52:43
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one of my friends once, somehow, singned me up on some exclusive business list where you get CONSTANT mailings trying to sell things to your business. he made up this (dumb) name, "Tony's drugs".. since my name is tony. very clever.
so i would get prototypes of clocks that said "Tony's Drugs" or pens, or stationary.. it was pretty funny
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 08:56:17
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More more - I'm out of ideas for senseless pranks!
I'd be safe and warm if I was in L.A
California Dreamin' on such a winter's day
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 09:04:29
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i don't know if it would work the same over their surfer, but an all time classic:
call an army recruiting office after hours and leave a message (from your friend) saying that you're interested in joining up. and leave their #
those guys will never leave you alone again. ever. even if you tell them it was a joke and you have a job or you're in college, they'll persist (and they're VERY aggressive)..
i'm fond of that one
there are too many to mention..
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
Edited by - floop on 02/05/2005 09:06:06 |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 09:23:30
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I'm taking notes Floop.
I have 2 lists of people, one is called "bastards who must pay" and the other is called "ah what the hell I'm bored, let's have some fun"
I'd be safe and warm if I was in L.A
California Dreamin' on such a winter's day
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 09:27:00
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there are some good ones in here http://forum.frankblack.net/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=8823
and more still
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/05/2005 : 10:01:08
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For the office there are a few classics to play on someone.
Firstly, either remove their mouse ball, or place a piece of tape over it.
Secondly, place a piece of clear tape over their mouthpiece on their phone. It's so funny to hear their next telephone conversation.
Thirdly, go to 'control panel' and then 'mouse' on their PC and change the 'double click speed' to either the fastest or slowest setting. I find that fastest is the most fun.
Fourthly, go to the same 'mouse' section of their PC and 'switch primary and secondary buttons'
Fifth, in the same 'mouse' section (loads of fun to be had here), change their pointer speed (I find that the slowest setting is the most frustrating for them). Also you might want to 'display a pointer trail', to really make them think their mouse is fucked.
Sixth, in the 'wheel' section of the 'mouse' settings (assuming they have a wheel mouse), increase the number of lines it scrolls at a time to the highest possible, or even set it to scroll one page at a time.
(All these mouse changes together (excluding the removal of the mouse ball/taping of the mouse ball) cause absolute chaos. You just watch them go nuts.)
Seven, swap the ink cartridges in their pens. Swap black for red and vice versa, green for blue etc.
I have more, but I can't think of them right now.
Love, love, my season |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 08:19:44
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I started a thread on those two wackjobs a few weeks ago. Too lazy to
hunt it down.
KOK, maybe you can get a doll that looks like Star?
 I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 11:58:58
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I was going to but I was so afraid that during our "love making" a doll of her husband would sneak up behind me and ruin my night.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:24:13
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"love making"?
You crack me up, KOK!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:36:06
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Well, all I've got going for me these days is my frequent dates with Palmella Handerson so sex with a life size doll would be considered "love making'' here at my house.
By the way "Palmella Handerson" is a Homer original. I don't mind you using it as long as you give credit where credit is due. And it's due to Jason Homer (of Boston comedy circuit fame), AKA "The King of Karaoke". You heard it here first.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:40:20
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Thank you for that clarification and information. I can tell you are not
just an able comedian but a capable trademark attorney. Or something.
Sadly, I have no use for Miss P. Handerson but the thought is appreciated.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:43:36
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quote:
Originally posted by kathryn
Sadly, I have no use for Miss P. Handerson
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank
Even more sadly is that I do.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 12:49:57
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How can that be the case when Star is waiting for you, KOK?
Rub a dub dub time!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 13:05:34
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quote:
Originally posted by kathryn
How can that be the case when Star is waiting for you, KOK?
Rub a dub dub time!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank
I can't afford the Star model Kay. It's $2000.00 for a doll up to 135lbs. It's $100.00 for every Five pounds after that. I just refinanced my house so I have to wait a while to build up some more equity. Luckily they do specific body parts if you can't afford the whole doll. I'm just buying her ass for now. That's going to run me about $2700.00 plus applicable tax and shipping. They will only deliver peices that heavy curbside. I'll have to recruit a couple of Mexican farm workers to help me get it inside my house. I've spoken with a couple of guys down at the fields in Oceano and they said they'd do it for a thirty pack of Tecate and one of my old Hustlers.
As you can probably tell, I'm pretty excited!
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 14:51:30
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quote:
Originally posted by The King Of Karaoke
By the way "Palmella Handerson" is a Homer original. I don't mind you using it as long as you give credit where credit is due. And it's due to Jason Homer (of Boston comedy circuit fame), AKA "The King of Karaoke". You heard it here first.
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I sorry to have to do this to you KoK, especially in light of you sending me a gift recently and generally being a top man, but you sir are a liar (or simply disillusioned). That term has been going for years and years, well it has in this country anyway.
So no I did not hear it here first.
I feel bad now, but I HAD to do it. You understand right?
Love, love, my season |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:17:39
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Well I came up with it like seven years ago so....
I know you are B.S.ing me MonkeyBoy. I evented that baby. That's only one of many.
You ever hear anyone say "Hey Homeslice!"? That started as a spin off from my last name. True story.
You ever hear anyone say "I'm pinching a loaf" to describe a bowel movement. Right here Sammy.
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:23:21
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Yeah right, you'll be telling us you invented 'touching cloth', and 'dropping the kids of at the pool' next.
Love, love, my season |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:31:20
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No but I do like and use the latter. i first heard that from a comedian somewhere and due to my usage it made it's way into the mainstream.
I consider myself much more unique than most and am constantly inventing new hip expressions.
here's my latest. if something is cool or fun or whatever. Where others are saying stuff like"Tha's Sick" Or "Thats' PHAT" I'm saying: "Wow! That's pretty darn sanctimonious!"
You watch Monkey. You watch
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:36:39
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I've got one, i've been throwing around in my head for a while now. I'll give it you and if you use it in your everyday life (with family, friends, business meetings), it's bound to catch on.
Ok you ready?
Here it is................
Cunt.
Try it.
Love, love, my season |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:43:17
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At least were back on topic.
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 15:51:45
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You think that of your friend?
Love, love, my season |
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VoVat
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
9168 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 16:21:06
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quote:
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by The King Of Karaoke
By the way "Palmella Handerson" is a Homer original. I don't mind you using it as long as you give credit where credit is due. And it's due to Jason Homer (of Boston comedy circuit fame), AKA "The King of Karaoke". You heard it here first.
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I sorry to have to do this to you KoK, especially in light of you sending me a gift recently and generally being a top man, but you sir are a liar (or simply disillusioned). That term has been going for years and years, well it has in this country anyway.
But no one else ever thought of trademarking it, did they? There you go.
"Reunion? Shit union!" |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 16:26:40
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My lawyer will be in touch.
Love, love, my season |
Edited by - Homers_pet_monkey on 02/06/2005 16:27:17 |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 17:14:47
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quote:
Originally posted by kathryn
How can that be the case when Star is waiting for you, KOK?
Rub a dub dub time!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank
ummm are those chickens behind her head?
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 17:29:57
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Cocks I think.
Love, love, my season |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 02/06/2005 : 17:49:45
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BOOM BOOM
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 11:17:29
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That's .... sanctimonious!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 12:37:25
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Um? I've been thinking this over and I think I may have signed myself up for the Star & Al news letter.
Disregard.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 12:44:37
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Just don't sign any of us up, OK?
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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dayanara
* Dog in the Sand *
Australia
1811 Posts |
Posted - 02/07/2005 : 13:44:43
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what a lovely woman. she reminds me of grimace, from mcdonalds. i saw her recently at a restaraunt when she was in town for donald trump's wedding. she was bitching at the waitress and letting the whole place know how famous and important she is.
i'm curious as to how one "accidentally" signs up for the star and al newsletter. that's like accidentally signing up for herpes.
A monkey will eat dirt if you make him. |
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I'll kill the bastard!
