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PsychicTwin
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1772 Posts |
 Posted - 11/18/2004 : 12:46:14
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Ok, I can't believe I'm actually posting this...I must be insane.
Let me start by saying that the other night I was spending some time with a girl I REALLY REALLY like. we had been out drinking that night...a lot...and things started getting very intimate when we got back to my room. The problem that soon surfaced was, because of my extreme liquor intoxication (and probably a fair deal of nerves), ummmm.....I couldn't function in a sexual mannner. I'm talking zero, zilch, no matter how hard I tried. My utter frustration and horror only exacerbated the situation. Of course, my ego has undergone what I would liken to a multiple stab-wound trauma. Luckily I am going to have a chance to redeem myself very soon, SOBER and in top form.
has this happened to anyone else? I hope so, because it's never happened to me before and I feel like a worthless piece of shit at this juncture...I know there were reasons for it (i.e. I was completely shit-faced from a mix of liquors) but there is nothing more ego-crushing than an event such as this one...NOTHING.
I know this query was directed to the guys, but feedback (reassurance?) from the ladies would be much appreciated as well...
now excuse me while I go bludgeon myself in the crotch with a crowbar. repeatedly. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 12:51:17
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I've gotta' say I've never been drunk and done that, but I could see that being a little demoralizing.
 "Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 12:54:44
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Oh no whisky dick!
Don't freak out, I've seen it happen before, too much liquor will do that.
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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vilainde
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Niue
7443 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 12:57:42
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At least you didn't throw up on her. Could have been much worse.
(you didn't, right?)
Denis
"I believe in your perfect face..." |
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PsychicTwin
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1772 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:05:36
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Fortunately, no, there was no vomiting involved. Although I don't see how anything could have made the situation much worse...
I'm hating myself right now |
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:07:41
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if you were smashed, don't even worry about it - obviously if you have "another chance" then the girl didn't care that much - and she's the one who, if anyone, "should" care - you'll be fine man! we all need to have our spirits crushed now and then, and many don't get the second chance that you're speaking of
-brian
- "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
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Johnny Yen
= Cult of Ray =
USA
408 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:13:52
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I've been so drunk it took a long time to cum, and i always have to be a little more focused when i've been drinkin.
One good thing to do in that situation is to give them oral (if they can get off that way), just so they get theirs.
I'm sure this experience will change you for the better. Best of luck! |
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:15:10
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It has happened to me and it has happened to all the chickenshits that aren't posting on this thread.
Reassuringly though, I have also has the inverse be true...drunk as a bat but going ALL NIGHT...was able to bring it off 5 or 6 times - i shit you not. I didn't count hers...hell, she may not have even had one...but was full-on into it the entire time.
Amazing night. Thank you Crown Royal.
The liquor is not entirely to blame. It helps if the girl wants it...if she's just 'letting' you do things...tolerating you...that subconscious knowledge can be a REAL turn off. For me anyway.
Free your mind and your cock will follow. |
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BLT
> Teenager of the Year <
South Sandwich Islands
4204 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:22:10
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| Confucius say "Always practice temperance when the chance for booty looms near." |
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TarTar
* Dog in the Sand *
1965 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:25:06
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Psychic Twin, what happened to you happens to guys all the time. I'm sure on any given day, hundreds of drunk men have this happen to them. And you get a second chance. So don't sweat it.
Signature's are kind of like bumper stickers, only less sticky. |
Edited by - TarTar on 11/18/2004 13:25:49 |
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PsychicTwin
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1772 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:28:18
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thanks everyone. I ain't drinking a fucking drop tonight before we hang out, needless to say...
Lesson learned, I guess. |
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TarTar
* Dog in the Sand *
1965 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:29:35
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"Lesson learned"
And I wish you luck
Soothe the burn
Wake you up
Signature's are kind of like bumper stickers, only less sticky. |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:39:42
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I feel like I'm hiding in the locker room ;)
I think more guys should be like Johnny Yen ;)
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:44:17
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Dearest Carolyanna,
Some of us are. 
Sincerely,
KimStanley "supertongue" Robinson |
Edited by - KimStanleyRobinson on 11/18/2004 13:46:00 |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:46:08
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychicTwin
thanks everyone. I ain't drinking a fucking drop tonight before we hang out, needless to say...
Lesson learned, I guess.
Be sure to give us a report tomorrow |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:46:12
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Yeah okay Mr.I didn't count hers...hell, she may not have even had one.
haha ;)
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 13:53:01
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Well, she wasn't a big fan of cunnilingus...she was more into the actual 'sex act' itself.
Plus, she was (is) an admitted "tough nut to crack".
I had to learn the right buttons to push...there was some education on my part involved, but I'm a good learner. |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 14:51:05
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Hi. (blushes) I've been hiding behind Carolynanna in the locker room.
(suddenly in a commanding voice:)
Psychic, here is the deal: you are too young to have been a Dead
Kennedys fan. That's your real problem, bud. Because if you really knew their work, you would be nodding your head to their excellent tune
"Too drunk to fuck" and not worrying about a thing.
Allow me, a heterosexual female, to assure you that occasionally this
happens and it's OK. And if it happens to you again (and it most surely
will in the next five decades or so) remember that Latin term that KSR
mentioned above.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 15:00:54
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Hey, I have the same problem sober. I'm pretty sure it's all the years of porn and jerkin it that have destroyed my brain and penis. I think a lot of the time, I just think too much and pressure myself too much, and when you do that, it just doesn't work. However, if I can keep it up, I can go alllll night long.
Plus, yeah, I love giving oral sex. That gets me going.
I guess I just wasn't made for these times. |
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notkimdeal
- FB Fan -
82 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 17:19:00
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| All of a sudden I think I'm crushing on El Barto.... |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 18:20:25
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He has also written quite eloquently and downright poetically
of his appreciation of the female breast.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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TarTar
* Dog in the Sand *
1965 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 18:29:06
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Yeah, El Barto is like Steve Martin in Roxanne or something. I'm more like Steve Martin in The Jerk. "I found my special purpose!"
Signature's are kind of like bumper stickers, only less sticky. |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 18:35:23
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And what is your special purpose, TT?
The ladies wanna know!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 18:38:05
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I am infatuated with the female form.
I wrote that on my wall this week.
It's true. It's so very true.
I guess I just wasn't made for these times. |
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TarTar
* Dog in the Sand *
1965 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2004 : 18:45:24
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My Special Purpose is the Species Porpoise... or at least, my Special Purpose kind of looks like one. ACK!
Signature's are kind of like bumper stickers, only less sticky. |
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mun chien andalusia
= Quote Accumulator =
Italy
2139 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 06:29:10
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that's the dark side of alcohol. happened to me too and i guess that 99,9% of men had a similar experience and most of them never had a second chance (me included). it's also true that a couple of drinks make you last forever, but if you cross the line you can't get it up. just find your limit.
 join the cult of errol\and you can have a beer\without having to quit smoking
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 06:33:02
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BTW, w/regards to my earlier comment, I meant I've never had drunk sex, not that I've been drunk and that's never happened.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Lex
- FB Fan -
United Kingdom
83 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 06:45:24
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Yeah it's happened to me...BLUSH......but you get there in the end........2nd chance in the morning!!!
And as was said before you can't beat a bit of (a lot actally) of the old "funny linguist" ; )
Once I was at a party and I knew this girl had a reputation....pretty scared and pissed I was taken away to her room!!!!!!!............In the morning a friend (who hadn't been to the party the night before) popped his head around the door and I said to him" I thought you were coming last night"
......and then she (sitting next to me in bed) said "your not the only one"
More friends and my brother were there to here that..........but so what I had a better time than they did...........and hats off to her,I thought she was pretty quick with the quip!!
She did have a sort of good time really......honest!!!! : ( |
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Domestiques
= Cult of Ray =
United Kingdom
503 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 08:29:47
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ahem, I fell asleep once. thats Jack Daniels for you.
------------------------
“I want to be a star!” I cried
They said, “You’re overqualified.
Why don’t you learn to tune your damn guitar?” |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 08:53:29
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Okay I would be scarred for life if someone fell asleep!
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 10:24:30
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
BTW, w/regards to my earlier comment, I meant I've never had drunk sex, not that I've been drunk and that's never happened.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)"
I feel a little funny saying this, but thanks for clarifying, Dean.
You had me marveling there.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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PsychicTwin
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1772 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 10:41:00
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The time of redemption is drawing near...one of these nights...
All this feedback has made me feel a lot better, I have to say. But I still have this unbearable need to redeem myself, and I won't rest until I'm able to do so. Were it a one-night stand kind of thing, I would probably not give it a 2nd thought. But I'm really into this girl, have been for a while (and it is mutual from what I understand)
that's why it bothers me so much.
alcohol is evil. |
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 10:43:05
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"to alcohol - the cause of and solution to all of life's problems" - homer simpson
-brian
- "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
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dayanara
* Dog in the Sand *
Australia
1811 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 10:57:52
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Don't let the "unbearable need to redeem" yourself fuck you up. You'll get all nervous and psyche yourself out. Just be cool, daddy-o.
Around here, intolerance will not be tolerated |
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PsychicTwin
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1772 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2004 : 11:20:54
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word.
(: |
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <
USA
3759 Posts |
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Topic |
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A question for the guys on the forum
