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KimStanleyRobinson
* Dog in the Sand *
1972 Posts |
 Posted - 11/02/2004 : 09:32:47
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I know its retarded to do it, but I just had to post this.
Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering Department,University of Oklahoma, is known for posing
questions on final exams like: "Why do airplanes fly?"
In May a few years ago, the "Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer " exam paper contained the question:
"Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a proof."
Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or similar. One student, however, wrote the following:
"First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions, and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell. With the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in the volume of Hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.
[Answer 1] So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
[Answer 2] Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate (given to me by Teresa Banyan during freshman year) that "it'll be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and taking into account that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then [Answer 2] cannot be correct; ...... thus, Hell is exothermic. "
The student got the only A. |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 09:44:12
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I love that one. So funny.
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 09:48:37
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CoF:
i didn't say having faith is wrong, i said it's obvious all religions are wrong.
why are they wrong? because they say they know how the universe was created, they don't.
if you want to believe that some guy created us, that's fine, maybe there is some guy that created us. but if you say 'i'm catholic', that means you believe in catholicism, which is obviously bullshit. some old, dying polish guy in italy doesn't have some hotwire to god that you and i can't have because we don't have a fancy miter.
i didn't say that it's obvious there's no higher power that created us, in fact that only thing i'm sure of is that we don't know. so i wouldn't say there isn't.
but i do know that all organized religions are wrong. incorrect. and thus invalid. |
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billgoodman
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Netherlands
6213 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 11:32:04
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quote:
Originally posted by Ebb Vicious
the problem is religion says a, it doesn't say 'your guess is as good as mine' it says 'my guess is right.'
mine doesn't
 "I joined the cult of Jon Tiven/Bye!" |
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 12:04:13
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really what religion is that?
because while it may be the hip thing for religions to recognize each other and say "oh yes buddhism has good aspects" and "judaism is what chrisitanity is originally based upon!", in the end they all try to claim that they alone have the *whole* picture, or in a few cases, the *best* picture.
and of course it's malarky, none of them know anything. |
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jediroller
* Dog in the Sand *
France
1718 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 12:11:36
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But Dean, I am a bad person.
I didn't mean to offend. I'm sorry if I did.
Take this rock and shake it 'til it bleeds. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:20:32
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No worries. I am also evil.
 "Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:36:28
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you can't be evil, I had you down as a being of light and bunny rabbits
Frank Black ate my hamster |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:38:12
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No one made of light and bunny rabbits wears a cape like that.
"You ever seen a man say goodbye to a shoe?"
"Yes, once..." |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:39:26
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quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000
No one made of light and bunny rabbits wears a cape like that.
"You ever seen a man say goodbye to a shoe?"
"Yes, once..."
What about Liberace?? |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:47:38
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He sold poisoned milk to school children.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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slaveish
= Cult of Ray =
USA
269 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 15:54:22
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| I really don't believe in god, I never have, yet I've been holding onto the last threads of Judasim I was raised with, and I think purely for social reasons. I think if you're raised amongst a group of people that believe something, and even if you can't quite get your mind around what they believe in, it can be scary to break away from that and admit to yourself that you're just not a believer. So no, I don't believe in god, and I can't agree with organized religion, and I even believe that it has had a negative impact on the world. But still, I don't think it's my place to isult those people that do believe. I was having a conversation today with my cousin about Bush and his religious extremism. I think it can be hard for people to sort through all the problems of religion (extremism being one of them) and still have respect for people that believe in god. While I can't do it myself, I have known many reasonable, thoughtful and kind religious people, and I think their faith had something to do with their temperments. It's a dilemma. While I think that religion can be dangerous and I wish that it wasn't so widespread, I still respect people who have a balanced approach to religion. Besides, if there is something that you believe in (and in my case, it's that god does not exist) it is more likely that you will have people understand your side if you are tolerant with theirs. |
Edited by - slaveish on 11/02/2004 15:56:18 |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 16:11:28
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Folks here wouldn't want schools teaching Christianity or any religion to their kids, which I certainly understand. Do you similarly accept that religious folks may have a right to be upset if schools teach from books that include stories about Wiccan life, or about "Bobby's Two Dads"?
"Not that there's anything wrong with it"
My own simplistic opinion is that schools should teach reading, 'riting, 'rithmetic, and not much beyond that. Teach methods, not substance. The "Golden Rule" would seem OK, if only because it's a principle of ethical consistency, not a Christian principle. |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 16:48:23
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*cough* evolution *cough*
Frank Black ate my hamster |
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 16:53:32
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teach methods not substance?
so teaching history and languages is bad right?
god you're such a fucking idiot. |
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BLT
> Teenager of the Year <
South Sandwich Islands
4204 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 16:55:09
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| I agree with Erebus. Teach them the three R's. No Leviticus or Melissa Etheridge, please. |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 16:55:19
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quote:
Originally posted by Tre
*cough* evolution *cough*
Good point. Can hardly teach biology without it, while to others it's all about religion. Damn sure don't want any of that Creation Science in there for "balance". Man, those Repubs actually ARE stupid as dirt! |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 17:01:12
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quote:
Originally posted by Ebb Vicious
teach methods not substance?
so teaching history and languages is bad right?
god you're such a fucking idiot.
Ebb, those are more about method than substance, at least to me. Teach thinking, not what to think. We teach history, languages, and a host of other things for the effect they have on the student's brain at a synaptic level, not for retention of the declarative content.
Is it really necessary to insult me every time? At this point it's only so much signal noise that just detracts from your message. I doubt anybody's entertained anymore. |
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 17:11:05
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you've got to be fucking kidding me. history is more about the effect it has on the student's brain on a synaptic level? please, teach me how to type out of my ass. i think that skill might get me a job in the circus.
i'm not even going to bother arguing against you because you're like a fucking flat-earth believer or something.
is it necessary to insult you? no. is anyone entertained? i am, and that's all that matters. |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 18:37:18
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Didn't initially feel it was necessary to get into this, but maybe it is. Except in the case of mathematics, which has been to referred to as "form without substance", I think it is safe to say that method and substance are never completely separate. It's a matter of degree. In the case of history, my point is that though the student's head is crammed with facts, most of us remember much of it beyond 1066, 1492, 1776, Napoleon, etc. But we do learn, usually despite ourselves, about broad human processes, and the value in that lies not in any ability to later regurgitate but instead in how it informs the way we interpret current events and make projections from there. We learn about what it means to be human, both as individuals and societies, and it is that which I refer to as method. That is what I cryptically meant by the synaptic level. Similarly, students learn algebra not so they can employ algebra as adults, at least not usually, but instead for the impact that it has upon their ability to think rationally in arenas completely outside of math. You don't do push-ups so you can do more push-ups. Rather, you do it so your body will be generally strong, and that is where the value in physical exercise lies. So it is with mental exercise. I realize this is an unconventional opinion. Frankly I think education would be well-served if more teachers approached it this way.
Ebb, when you greet the opinions of others with such violence, you're not going to gain much understanding, and you're not going to learn as much as you might. I too could do better at that. |
Edited by - Erebus on 11/02/2004 18:39:39 |
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~
Belize
5305 Posts |
Posted - 11/02/2004 : 19:16:04
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Wow, I must say I agree with most of you that it's out of line for someone to be handing out anti-abortion or Christian literature for Halloween. It is their right to hand it out, but why drag kids into their way of thinking? It's uncool.
If I was a kid I would be really bummed. I hate to say it but there are so many things that suck about being a kid and Halloween is one of those cool things that makes up for some of the crappy stuff.
I remember when I was little there was a dentist that handed out toothbrushes and that was a downer. Man, those people handing out that info really are not nearly as bad but almost as bad as those people that put razorblades in the Halloween candy, because they are not acting in those kid's best interest. I wish those people would just put themselves in those kids shoes and think about what they are doing.
http://www.campervanbeethoven.com/gearstolen/ |
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Hatchetman
- FB Fan -
United Kingdom
234 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 08:01:03
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quote:
Originally posted by Ebb Vicious
unlike the other two guys, i don't really begrudge people who need the comfort blanket of religion to make it through their lives.
For the record I never said that I 'begrudge' anyone for what they believe in. People can and do what they like, no matter how amusing I find it.
If they want to believe that a God (no one has seen) exists somewhere in a magical place (that no one has seen) that created us all, fine by me.
I personally have little patience with religions that teach stuff like 'If you're good person you will be rewarded and go to heaven, but if you're a bad person, you will be punished and burn in hell for all eternity' etc.
Why would the devil punish you for doing his work? Surely he would reward you?
I once asked a Jehovah's witness that question and all he could say was 'Because the Devil is REALLY evil'
Ade
As the air conditioner hummed.... |
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Broken Face
-= Forum Pistolero =-
USA
5155 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 08:12:45
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it has nothing to do with the devil if you get into it theologically, which i really don't want to do. too depressed about the election - get back to me sometime next week...
-brian
- "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 08:15:21
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erebus i don't care about "understanding" and you have nothing to teach me.
i greet you with outright mocking because you're an idiot and your ideas are laughable.
you're a stupid person who thinks he's a great intellectual. |
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harringk
- FB Fan -
USA
202 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 11:06:39
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quote:
Originally posted by Hatchetman
I personally have little patience with religions that teach stuff like 'If you're good person you will be rewarded and go to heaven, but if you're a bad person, you will be punished and burn in hell for all eternity' etc.
That is not what Christianity teaches at all. That is probably the single biggest misconception about Christianity (that unfortunately many Christians make themselves). Good deeds do not get you into Heaven. Bad deeds do not condemn you to Hell. Nobody earns their way into Heaven, they simply accept the free gift of salvation.
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 11:35:08
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hahahaha harringk, so fucking full of himself and his beliefs he even believes he's the only one that has christianity right!
way to go, chief! |
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harringk
- FB Fan -
USA
202 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 11:57:05
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No there are millions of Christians who understand that perfectly. Unfortunately there are also some who don't, along with most secularists who are ignorant of what Christianity actually teaches.
Just for the record, since I decided to post in this thread, I am also against passing out religious stuff to kids at Halloween. If they didn't want to pass out candy, they should have turned off their lights and not answered the door. |
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VoVat
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
9168 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 19:33:52
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quote:
I was checking (hehe) the kids' candy last night,
when I noticed a few different cards and a cassette tape.
It was a tape of hymns and the cards all had various different christian messages and things like where to buy christian kids' books etc.
I thought it was in poor taste, any opinions?
Well, it couldn't have been any worse than Necco Wafers or "Bit O' Honey," could it? :P
"Signature quotes are so lame." --Nathan |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 11/03/2004 : 21:46:49
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Bit O' Honeys kick ass, dude. And my belief about religion and children is that children should not be brought up in a religion. It should not be introduced until an older age, much like sex ed. It's a heavy subject that should not be taken lightly, and you need to ability to make decisions in order to decide if you think religion is for you or not. I think the world would be a lot better and a lot less ignorant if this were the process.
I guess I just wasn't made for these times. |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 08:28:40
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| El Barto, we agree! Inculcating a belief in god in the mind of a child long before they're close to thinking for themselves, so sad. It's like giving them a centerpiece for their universe almost before they have a universe. I think that if parents truly have faith in the rationality of their beliefs, they'll be comfortable encouraging their kids to make up their own minds. I know you've got to teach kids something, but not the end before the beginning. |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 12:28:38
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It's impossible to not teach or talk to them about religion. They ask questions. My daughter knows my position and knows that her mom differs a little with me about religion. But, even if you try to not push your beliefs onto them, when they are little they are going to believe what you believe. That's not the same a full indoctrination, but it's also different from thinking they are going to be blank slate when they reach adulthood.
For example, this week my daugther's first grade class on their own was discussing the election. She reported to me that they all supported Kerry (they don't really know what that means), even one girl supports Kerry despite her parents supporting Bush. Peer pressure strong even in the first grade. |
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Erebus
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1834 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 13:42:25
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Agreed darwin. When I was with a lady with two small children, both of us never raised such things on our own, but when the youngsters came home from school with questions, we did answer, to include sharing our own belief about the supernatural and afterlifes. I always kept it to a minimum, but also thought of it as an antidote.
Drives me crazy when kids show political allegiances. My faves are those on either side of abortion clinic pickets. To actively indoctrinate a child on matters they can't possibly comprehend smacks of nothing less than child abuse. |
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TameReg
- FB Fan -
USA
110 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 16:22:50
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| There are a lot of good points in this discussion. I am a Catholic, and I think people giving this kind of stuff to kids is absurd. Let them be kids. The kind of Christians who would pass out this kind of stuff are the scary kind. Most Christians aren't this bad. |
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Jefery With One F
- FB Fan -
Canada
184 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 20:50:19
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Why is it a problem for Christians to tell kids the truth about abortions while there's no problem with the schools lying to the kids, telling them that Unicef boxes on Halloween are a great thing, and not telling them the truth about that money they collect going to fund abortion clinics?
Vote Bush in 2004 |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 11/04/2004 : 23:49:08
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| Tell us more Jefery! Give us a link showing UNICEF funds abortion clinics! |
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Topic |
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Halloween treats from Christians
