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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
 Posted - 11/12/2004 : 15:07:36
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As your legal council, as must advise against continuing to distract me thoughts of you in jeans and t's lounging and/or looking resentfull. Granted, there was no way for you to know that in comparison to jeans, t-shirt and basic white cotton underwear, I think garters 'n heels are about a sexy as a mustard stained moo-moo, you should still be aware that your descriptions of your see-through pink top will leave me utterly unable to stand and defend you at trial.
In the matter of the pic posting, I can be of assistance beyond matters legal, rest assured. |
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notkimdeal
- FB Fan -
82 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2004 : 15:19:29
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stand-in advice columnist, scientist, lawyer, computer geek... Is it getting warm in here?
*fans self with cardboard insert from black thigh-high pantyhose package* |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2004 : 15:24:35
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| Feel free to sprinkle the above liberally with "genius, rock star, avid Sex and the City/Gilmore Girls watcher, and high cheek bones". I hope your arm doesn't get tired as you fan yourself back to a healthy 36.6 while considering the prospect of discussing FB's latest solo output AND debating the merits of Baryshnikov as an actor. |
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notkimdeal
- FB Fan -
82 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2004 : 16:07:47
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Speedy, I'm becoming uncomfortable with our professional working relationship.
If you can also do my hair and ride a cool bicycle I'll have to fire you as my counsel, drop the charges, and move to Saskatoon where I can and will wear jeans, T's and sensible cotton underwear every single day for the rest of our lives. You'd have to support me, of course, because I'll never find a job equal to the one I have presently, but a man of such varied talents is no doubt up to the task. Please advise. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2004 : 22:20:52
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Although I have no specific advise to contribute beyond what Speedy has contributed on my behalf (all of which I agree with wholeheartedly), I should say that a move to Saskatoon would be the correct thing to do, from a legal/socio-economic standpoint.
Also, to those others whose questions I have yet to answer... I have been meditating and will continue to do so until Sunday at sunup. The solutions will present themselves then.
 "Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/12/2004 : 22:24:43
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Finally, you'll forgive my nosiness (or else!), but were you in Nimrod's Son or Big Big Love, or am I altogether misplacing you? Oh, and Mike owns one of these (below). It may not look like much, but I believe he's ranked third in our local velodrome's standings. He has to pedal so fast.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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notkimdeal
- FB Fan -
82 Posts |
Posted - 11/13/2004 : 00:10:53
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Dean, I am very honoured by your advice. Here's a photo for your consideration:
http://www.members.shaw.ca/notkimdeal/ Enjoy, it's the only one you're getting. You can't really tell, but I was wearing jeans at the time.
So if I'm reading you both correctly, I should: tell my employer to shove it, toss my lingerie, slip into my levi's, sell my house in Victoria and, with the proceeds of the sale, purchase a small town near Saskatoon and let Speedy keep me in the luxury lifestyle to which I will quickly become accustomed. Whereas his bicycle is not as "cool" as I might have expected, just knowing he pedals fast (the Lance Armstrong of the prairies, yes? ROTFLOL ), I assume he's good to go for doing my hair?
On the other hand, Wave of Mutilation... could I leave my boys? A question better asked in the "Ask Dave" thread perhaps?
HHHmmm. I too shall meditate. |
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dayanara
* Dog in the Sand *
Australia
1811 Posts |
Posted - 11/14/2004 : 21:09:42
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Dear Dean,
Why am I so broke all the goddamn time?
Also, can you lend me some money?
Around here, intolerance will not be tolerated |
Edited by - dayanara on 01/11/2005 17:09:07 |
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Dave Noisy
Minister of Chaos
Canada
4496 Posts |
Posted - 11/22/2004 : 23:32:49
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Oh boy..some questions:
k: yeah, dairy is addictive, both the fat and other compounds. Once you've gone a while without eating it, and then you have some, you feel really gross and don't want to go back.
vovat: most soy cheese has casein, a milk protein, ironically! But even if it's vegan, it's only 'cheddar flavored'.
tre: yuck. It's not cannibalism if it's not flesh and it's voluntary...like are human babies cannibals? =P Still, i would not choose to consume human milk, except perhaps if i had an SO, and she were to give birth, i'd be curious.
notkimdeal: i noticed a link to Velonews in your profile...you ride? I'm a trackie over at the Juan de Fuca. =)
 "Live life like you're gonna die...because you are." - William Shatner, You'll Have Time / Has Been |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 06:30:18
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Oops, hadn't been here in awhile either...
I should say to NotKimDeal, don't be sucked in by Dave's chicanery. Purchase Vanscoy while you still can! You can and must leave your boys. Also, to Dayanara, Dave will handle your question. :P
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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bazza
* Dog in the Sand *
Ireland
1439 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 06:44:26
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dean - why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
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cvanepps
= Cult of Ray =
USA
442 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 07:26:30
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Dean, I've been watching this thread with bemused interest but now I want to contribute. Here's my question.
Is the famous picture of Jack Ruby shooting Lee Harvey Oswald protected by a copyright or is that picture within the bounds of "public domain"?
Thanks.
-= It's not easy to kidnap a fat man =-
http://www.cvanepps.com |
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n/a
deleted
4894 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 09:56:51
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Dear Dean 'n' Dave
Why are we having trouble accessing the forum at the british end of things?
Frank Black ate my hamster |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 10:35:44
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Dear Dean
Tre's question is a serious one, for a change, so I please answer that one before tackling mine.
(taps foot, waits, waits, taps foot)
OK. Dean I did something I should have known wasn't a good thing. It wasn't a bad thing, but now I feel kinda crummy. There is no way to take back what I did. Any suggestions?
Oh, and congrats on your big ascension to Admin.
Signed
Feeling Yucky
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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notkimdeal
- FB Fan -
82 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 18:55:04
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Dear Dean
Who has better cyclist legs, Dave or Speedy? And please answer Bazza's question soon - now that it's asked, I need to know too!
NKD |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/23/2004 : 21:47:51
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Barry - Your question is easily the most difficult question I've been asked, and I've been asked questions like the origins of the universe, the meaning of life, and why everywhere in Europe has three names for the same place. To find your answer, I travelled the highest mountains (accessible from Saskatchewan), delved to the depths of the darkest seas (accessible from Saskatchewan), and travelled all around circle drive in both directions. The answer may shock you. Kamikaze pilots have generally been lobotomized and must keep the helmet on (and tightly) in order to prevent even the slightest bump from knocking them unconscious before they reach their target. The alternative theory states that it is worn for "protection". We'll never know. Good luck with the camoflauge.
Tre - That is a very good question but seems to be resolved for the moment. Send off an email if you have further troubles. Unfortunately, that's all I've got at the moment.
Kathryn - Don't worry about it, sometimes these things happen and it's not usually a big deal in the scheme of things. Focus instead on joining the cult of Frank (2.0).
NotKimDeal - You've come to the right place. I'm definitely in a position to evaluate both of their legs equally. While Mike's are probably stronger (I just came from the gym with him, the guy's a horse), his added muscle bulk is sure to be a detriment to his cycling career and thus I must give this resolutely to Dave, who is likely to soon be among the top cyclists in the country (seriously - good work, Dave!).
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Ten Percenter
- FB Enquirer -
United Kingdom
1733 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 01:49:30
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Dean, someone on tour at the moment asked me to submit the following heartfelt query. I quote:
"Asterid's His Kingly Cave. Why?" (FB)
"Fried food, cigarettes, no exercise, chest pain..." (Excerpt from the Angina Monologues) |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 04:03:43
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Dean,
Could we please have photographic evidence of said strong cyclist legs.
I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it was
just some b*stard with a torch, bringing me more work. |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 11:33:38
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Dean
I know that you won't mock me for asking such a question, but how, exactly, do I join the cult of Frank (2.0)? Do I have to give you my firstborn? Do I have to listen to Frank all day (if so, I already qualify!) Do I get free Canadian citizenship with the deal? I'm game but tell me more.
Signed
Feeling Better
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 11:47:08
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Not to bud in...
But Kathryn, you can join if you buy some of our cows. ;)
Or accept our raw goods brought into the US by a team of cows.
You don't even have to eat them (um that was for Dave) you can just ride them around town hehe.
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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Edited by - Carolynanna on 11/24/2004 11:49:20 |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 12:15:22
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Carolynanna, I'm a veg, too, but not a vegan (mmm, butter, mmmm, cheeeeeese!) but I live in a town with more cows that people, hon, so I don't have any use for your cows, though I am sure they are wonderful cows.
Can I do something that doesn't involve cows?
Did I just ask that?
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 12:18:42
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Fine! No prescription drugs for you! ;)
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 12:24:54
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Ha, um, ha.
Aaaaaaaaaaactually, I am buying oodles of them when I go to your wonderful country this weekend to catch (did I mention this?) three Pixies shows. Every time we go up to Canada we save shitloads of money buying the exact same meds that we have here, but they are so much cheaper up in wonderful Canada. Example: my allergy medicine costs me $87 US or.....
$15 Canadian. Here, I'll ask you the question I ask myself several times a day: What Would Frank Do?
Back on topic:
Dear Dean
You've just been promoted to Administrator. What can you do for us American forum members who are getting gouged away
by prescription drug costs?
Sincerely
Allergic To High Prices
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Frank |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 15:18:51
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quote:
Originally posted by kathryn
mmmm, cheeeeeese
I get this all the time.
Deaner:
How much board would a Mongol hoard, if a Mongol horde got bored?
"You ever seen a man say goodbye to a shoe?"
"Yes, once..." |
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Dave Noisy
Minister of Chaos
Canada
4496 Posts |
Posted - 11/24/2004 : 22:58:36
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Although my legs are bigger and more toned than ever, they're still hairy....come next summer, they will be utterly de-licious. =)
I will post pictures then..hehehe.. Or NKD, you can come out to the Juan de Fuca and check 'em out (and cheer 'em on!) in person!
Dean - get Mike to email me, i'd love to discuss training with him... (Or if you read this Mike. =)
"Live life like you're gonna die...because you are." - William Shatner, You'll Have Time / Has Been |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2004 : 06:25:57
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Andy/FB - In response, I asked Asterid on your behalf. They replied, "Well, the timing was right, what with the tribute and all. We are sorry to have kept you waiting anxiously for the cover for so many years, and we don't really know why it took so long, but our apologies."
Surfer Rosa - I'm afraid a visit to Canada will be in order for you.
Kathryn - Moving to Canada is the only solution. Frankly, I think we should mark up our prices to American levels for tourists... you know, just so you feel at home.
Cheeseman - A Mongol horde could not get bored and would not hoard a board for their lord has scored a cord so he can plug in all the latest entertainment devices far from the wall outlet and entertain the masses.
That is all. :)
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2004 : 06:32:51
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[quote]Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
Surfer Rosa - I'm afraid a visit to Canada will be in order for you.
Bizarre - Canada is the destination of choice for my next country to live in (USA won't have me) - could I get a job as your team's oil bunny?
I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it was
just some b*stard with a torch, bringing me more work. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2004 : 06:52:47
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I'm afraid that position is taken <flexes muscles>.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 11/25/2004 : 07:00:56
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Yet another dream shattered.
I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it was
just some b*stard with a torch, bringing me more work. |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 14:25:58
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dear Dean,
with so many advice columns, how do you choose which one?
Floop
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 14:36:08
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Any column but mine is pretty much acceptable. :P
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Homers_pet_monkey
= Official forum monkey =
United Kingdom
17125 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 14:47:25
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
Any column but one of floop's thousands is pretty much acceptable. :P
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)"
You got that right.
Sorry floopy, just jesting.
I spent a lifespan with no cellmate |
Edited by - Homers_pet_monkey on 01/11/2005 14:48:01 |
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~
Belize
5305 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 21:10:29
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| Dean, without looking how do you think Floop should answer the question I gave him?? Thanks! |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11690 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 22:45:07
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Correctly.
You're welcome.
"Join the Cult of Frank 2.0 / And you'll be enlightened (free for 1.x members)" |
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Perk
- FB Fan -
USA
210 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2005 : 23:09:05
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Dear Dean
Should I get out of the house more ?
Don't sweat the petty things
and don't pet the sweaty things |
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Topic |
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Ask Dean
