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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
 Posted - 10/06/2003 : 21:57:43
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I don't personally understand it...
Lust: While hormones play a role in it...it's still a choice. Modern society seems to promote it...even though it is something that ruins so many lives.
Promiscuity: Lust is usually the main reason why people are promiscious...but I also know a lot of women who sleep around because it makes them "feel wanted". The thing that I don't understand is why they don't realize that their partners are just interested in their vagina. Stupidity...
Dating/Relationships: Okay...what is really starting to piss me off is seeing 10 and 11 year olds running around with their "boyfriend" or "girlfriend". I mean...most of them even have physical relationships that go along with it..although mainly just 1st and 2nd base. I do know of a lot of people who have had sex at that age..ick. I don't know about you..but my virginity is something that I care about. I want to make my future wife feel as special as she can. I think that if she knew that she was "taking" my virginity that she would feel pretty special that I waited just for her and so on. I don't know...
People are also really shallow..it annoys me. I mean, I think it's wrong, yet I'm the odd one out. I'm the one who's ridiculed for not thinking of girls as "hot". Oh yeah, and according to them, I'm gay. I'm gay because I'm not superficial and don't watch porn - No joke. Do people not have morals anymore? Or even ethics for that matter? I don't get it. Blah. Okay...sorry for the rant...please voice your opinion.
I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. |
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Chip Away Boy
= Cult of Ray =
914 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 22:29:07
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| i like big butts and i cannot lie. |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 22:32:52
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i think the idea of monogamy is respectable, and worth the sacrifice it takes if you find the right person; having a steady, stable relationship is a good thing, and in the long run, will make you happier..
BUT i do think it goes against "nature' or genetics, or instincts what have you.. monogamous relationships are a cultural construct. not something we're naturally prone towards. that's why the divorce rate is so high (it's like 50 percent).. you can love someone your whole life, and have a lifelong partner and whatnot.. but you're desire to be with other people in a physical way will never go away..
there'll always be that tension, i think .
but then that's what makes relationships mean something; the fact that you're chosing not to be with anyone else.
as for me, i'm currently single.. and i'm getting tired of dating.. but at the same time, i'm certainly not opposed to sex.. i don't think sex is a bad thing.
am i wrong here? |
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 22:38:53
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I think it also depends on what sex means to you. For some people it's all physical while for others it's all emotional. I wouldn't know, haha, as I'm still a virgin. A lot of people just think of it as "oh..putting the penis in vagina. huhuh. that's not special at all."
I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 23:03:58
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I used to be somewhere in the same boat as you, but I found myself in love and though I never really planned it, I saw no reason ethically why two people in love shouldn't express it that way. I had always thought I'd wait until marriage at this point, even though being a healthy young lad I craved it as much, no, probably more than most of my friends since they had been doing it for years already, but, well, I think you know where I'm coming from.
Anyway, we/I were/was in love, marriage didn't even seem to be a question of anything except time, and we both wanted to take the intimacy to the next level, so why not? Now, that relationship did last for two years (and unofficially closer to three), but as you've probably guessed, it ended. I won't say how lest I leave you with zero faith in humanity whatsoever, but I found myself having to reevaluate my stance.
Is it wrong for people who care for each other to have expressed their love that way? Even if it might not be love? Does marriage really make a difference other than making the love and commitment official? And if it was wrong, then what was I to do with myself? For there was no turning back. I didn't like the fact that other girls out there have and had done it, but I had to accept that almost all of them had at some point just as I had. It's just a question of how much and what criteria/morals they have.
If they match my morals, then presumably, at least, they'll only have had sex with people they care for and so forth. If they're (their morals) stronger, they'd probably look at me in disgust. If they're weaker, than they'd probably look at me with a different kind of disgust (what's wrong with him, every guy (on TV) wants sex, and this guy doesn't?!). I HATE that we are supposed to act as scriptwriters in Hollywood portray us and if we deviate from that in any way, we are strange and non-ideal.
And that's probably where you fall in. Some of us are led by what the media tells us, or by what we see others doing, or just by animal instincts. This can be applied to anything, including music. I'm sure there are females out there with good taste and some passion about things like art and music and the finer things in life (including all of the female denizens on this forum - you have to have some passion to log on to an artist's forum and spend copious amounts of time here). There are females out there who are not sluts and haven't had sex by the third date with every boyfriend since 9th grade. Who haven't taken a guy home from the bar without even really knowing his full name. Maybe who have never done it at all. Or maybe they really have no interest in that whole bar scene to begin, nevermind casual sex. Or smoking. Or drugs. Or defacing their body. Or ... the list of standards and morals goes on to infinity. Where do you stand on that continuum? The further out you are, the less you may see.
But like all the finer things in life, they are rare. Painfully so, at least in my experience. I have yet to meet one, but they have to be out there, just by the laws of statistics. I exist. I'm male. And there are others like me. There must be a complimentary proportion in the female side.
What frustrates me is that if I do think that someone would be a nice girl to get to know better, they always have a dumb-ass boyfriend (DAB) to go along with - I've got no problem with girls that have nice, cool, whatever boyfriends; it makes me happy for both of them and offers a little hope to me, I suppose, though it may be conceted to say so. But the rest all seem to say how they're looking for people that will treat them well and respect them and be honest and faithful and whatever else, and then they finish their sentence and turn away to date anyone but you. It makes a guy think about wearing a baseball cap, knocking out a front tooth, and eliminating polysylabbic words from one's repetoire. Watching all the drivel on the television and forsaking talented musicians in favour of what is deigned 'radio-quality'. Trading in my piano for hockey equipment and my computer for backissues of Maxim, Playboy, Hustler, and Jugs dating from 1988 forward.
It's tough to not be like everyone else; it's lonely. Morals, beliefs, tastes, desires, dreams, all of these things define us. You're looking for someone who is also not like every other girl out there. Maybe she exists. Maybe she doesn't. I haven't found her. But when I do, I know that it will be the sweetest vintage I ever put my lips to such that I shall desire to drink naught else and cherish that forever. And if I don't, I suppose I will die ignorant of this exquisite sweetness and never really understand the magnitude of what I missed, perhaps ignorance is not bliss, but if it staves off total devastation, then some good has come of it.
Have I gone off topic? Yes and no. Mostly yes. :) But I suppose I'm trying to say that it will be worth it and hang on to your morals if you feel justified in doing so. You're not the only one in this position, and I definitely understand where you're coming from. It's a frustrating life. Especially since at least part of you must want to have sex, even if you feel it's wrong to do so, yet you see everyone else indulging and enjoying it. As for superficial, I suppose if it's demeaning, then I agree, but I see no probably in enjoying the art of a beautiful woman.
Yikes, this is long and I can't even cut out a paragraph or two 'cause it won't flow. It should make up for me being out of the office all day tomorrow. Hope that helps or is at least food for thought, Mr. Fouton. If not, blame Dave.
The further you are along the moral continuum, the higher the value of the spot on which you stand.
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 23:07:30
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2$%^%@$&@&%, that's even longer looking when it's not all contained in this little reply window. Oh well, excerpts from my new book entitled Dean tells all: Does Anybody Really Care?!?! with special appearances by such Hollywood celebrities as Steven Segal, Kevin Costner, and Andrea Falishy.
 "Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 10/06/2003 : 23:19:28
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hehe, very nice post. Atleast someone understands where I stand...Thanks.
I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. |
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interloper
= Cult of Ray =
440 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 05:24:04
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We are greatly tied into our biology, and that means to make babies. When we men get google eyed for large breats, for instance, what it really means is that those large breats can feed the baby that we put in them. On the flip as well, perhaps physical strength in men means potency to women. Our lives are seemingly determined by some form of instinct, mingled with childhood experience that we learn. Men look for their mothers, Women look for their fathers. Know any gay men who have father issues? Either that they were gone, or they hate them? What about gay women? Know any gay women who are missing mothers in some degree? It's not a knock on homosexuality, it makes sense. My one and only true stalker that I ever had used to swear up and down that I looked exactly like her father. I never saw the poor guy. Weird. The media greatly plays on these things. We are sold products through the taunting of our biological urges. They are not stupid. They know what gets our attention. Whatever. You also have to consider that we are overpopulating ourselves at a pheonominal rate. Think about it. Two people make two more people. That's four people. The second pair makes four in total, and so on. We don't die nearly as fast as we make babies. 2x2 is 4. 4x4 is 8. 8x8 is 16. You get the point. I don't know...I really have no idea what my point is. Im a guy, and I really, really love girls, but regardless of how many Saturday nights I spend doing sound in bars surrounded by scantilly clad females, I remain totally loyal to my girlfriend, and will never have a problem doing so, unless of course it's done to me. I guess I just wish humans could evolve a bit. There has to be something more to all of this besides the instinct to further our genes, because it's kind of pointless. Especially seeing as how we may eventually evolve into one big gas mask. I dunno, read a book or something. Watch 2001. Whatever. Everyone needs to think more.
Remember that movie "Enemy Mine"? The alien species reproduced naturally without intercourse, and when they did, the parent died to control the population. Interesting.
I have to cut this short, Jennifer Lopez's butt is on tv.
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 08:57:32
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| Dean, I truly and sincerely hope you find that woman, good luck. |
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WolfManMikeLonely
= Cult of Ray =
USA
936 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 10:06:25
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Just stay the course my friend, she'll come along. Just hopefully when she does it works out better for you than it did for me, but never ever compromise yourself. Personally I find it reassuring that there are people like you out there strong and uncorrupted.
"Hey fuck you if you don't like it."
-Johnny Thunders |
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Coldheartofstone
* Dog in the Sand *
Canada
2025 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 10:17:26
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I know Love exists...i Just can't prove it...
BOY, does my head hurt... |
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WolfManMikeLonely
= Cult of Ray =
USA
936 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 10:22:36
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Kinda like aliens.
"Hey fuck you if you don't like it."
-Johnny Thunders |
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Coldheartofstone
* Dog in the Sand *
Canada
2025 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 10:39:08
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very true...
such wisdom
BOY, does my head hurt... |
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gracie
= Cult of Ray =
United Kingdom
573 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 11:25:26
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I am in a long term relationship with someone I love and there is no way i'd wait until I was married. If thats what you want to do that's fine, don't listen to other people it doesn' make you gay, just frustrated.
I think sex is great and even though i'm in a loving relationship I would have sex with someone that i didn't love.
I don't think that is immoral, i'm not hurting anyone, as long as it was between consenting adults. I know some women "sleep around" to find reassurance and end up feeing used and like shit but it doesn't have to be that way, it depends on your reason for having sex in the first place, is it because you feel in need of emotional reassurance or are you just horney?
On the point of immorality I would never knowingly sleep with a married man or someone who already had a relationship.
I think sex is about emotions sometimes, but sometimes it just about sex.
Thats just my theory, i've been with my boyfriend for 7 years and have never actually slept with someone I didn't have feelings for, but by the same token i'm used to getting it on a regular basis, if we split up I don't think i could wait until in fell in love again. |
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apl4eris
~ Abstract Brain ~
USA
4800 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 11:41:57
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Right on, gracie. Personally, over time I grew to believe that it was important for me to understand myself and grow/mature through realtionships (and sex, not mutually exclusive for me) before comitting to one person. I ended up marrying my very good friend from highschool - we had both been afraid to mention our feelings for each other for 11 years! And we're both glad that we had the chance to grow and learn in our other relationships before we got together, because through all of life's twisted paths, we ended up 2 of the luckiest people on earth, and I can appreciate how rare and precious it really is. We didn't wait until we got married - we lived together for 5 years first, and that, too, got us to a place where we could appreciate the relationship on its own merits, without the institution of marriage dictating the way we relate to each other. Am I making sense at all? ;) I have had good and bad experiences with sex and relationships, and though at times I wished I had done some things differently, I have worked to own/know my mistakes/weaknesses and also tried to own a really negative experience rather than be a victim to it. Ultimately, I feel it is important to stay true to yourself, and to learn from experience whenever possible.
Morality is your own conscience. And sometimes a pipe is just a pipe. "Ceci n'est pas une pipe." ;)
Edit: typo
"Let x = x." - Laurie Anderson |
Edited by - apl4eris on 10/07/2003 11:43:14 |
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mereubu
= FB QuizMistress =
USA
2677 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 14:28:45
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quote:
Originally posted by Carolynanna
Dean, I truly and sincerely hope you find that woman, good luck.
No lie. That was lovely, Dean.
And good points, gracie & apl.
"I joined the Cult of Frank / And all I got was this lousy icon" |
Edited by - mereubu on 10/07/2003 14:30:21 |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 15:04:33
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Well, thank you both. Really. Thank-you.
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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ProverbialCereal
- FB TabMaster -
USA
2953 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 15:37:04
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quote:
Originally posted by Cult_Of_Frank
I haven't found her. But when I do, I know that it will be the sweetest vintage I ever put my lips to such that I shall desire to drink naught else and cherish that forever.
It maybe too deep for a pickup line, but you better use that line on your next girlfriend.
 "I joined the Incredible Cult of Frank / Then I got pissed and turned green" |
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Dave Noisy
Minister of Chaos
Canada
4496 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 17:54:17
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Holy mackeral, whadda bunch of pansies. =)
I agree that i don't believe our minds aren't hard-wired for monogamy. It's a societal/personal value.
In our society tho, i think we function better overall this way..especially since polygamy is generally frowned on. (Why, i dunno. I think three or five parents would have a much better job at raising several kids that two.)
I'd suggest, if you want to have sex a lot, making sure that it's really a desire to have sex, and not some other deep-set psychological disfunction, as it more-often-than-not is.
Do whatever you want to do, just make sure you are really doing it for the reasons you want to. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 18:16:27
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Derek, I actually have that tattooed on my forehead so I don't ever actually say it, but just lift the hair, point, and say to the girl in question, "Study."
Dave: Yes. To what, I leave up to you.
Anyway, sorry, I'm not trying to hijack his thread, back to Mr. Fouton.
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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Crispy Water
= Cult of Ray =
Canada
819 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 19:35:15
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This already gets my vote for the best discussion I've seen on this forum.....is that just because it's a topic on which everyone seems to actually have a (serious) take? That question was to myself, but still, good points everyone.
Nothing is ever something. |
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TheCroutonFuton
- Mr. Setlists -
USA
1728 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 21:38:50
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haha, no problem cult_of_frank (Dean) haha. I'm just an angry confused young man. Kinda like Elvis Costello used to be, hehe. Okay...anyways...thanks for all of the opinions everyone. Not that I agree with all of them, but thankyou for sharing your view on the matter.
I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. |
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speedy_m
= Frankofile =
Canada
3581 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 22:38:41
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I think attempting to define love is part of the great human journey. We all strive for it, in our own way, and we may all end up with different conclusions.
 ixies |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 22:47:44
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quote:
Originally posted by Dave Noisy
I'd suggest, if you want to have sex a lot, making sure that it's really a desire to have sex, and not some other deep-set psychological disfunction, as it more-often-than-not is.
i'm sorry, but can you explain why wanting to have sex is "more often than not .. some deep-set psychological disfunction" |
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Dave Noisy
Minister of Chaos
Canada
4496 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 23:04:23
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Sure floop, tho i'm no expert.
Take the case of a 'horny, unsatiable woman', who is constantly looking for someone to fuck. Often, these women will have been sexually abused as a child, and are literally programmed to seek this out, as it is a part of what's familiar to them, and what represents 'love', as fucked up as that is.
It isn't healthy, and she really isn't seeking sex or intimacy, sadly, she's trying to fill some void of her past.
This is one more obvious example. And i'm not saying anyone here, Dean, is like this. |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2003 : 23:10:35
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quote:
Originally posted by Dave Noisy
Sure floop, tho i'm no expert.
Take the case of a 'horny, unsatiable woman', who is constantly looking for someone to fuck. Often, these women will have been sexually abused as a child, and are literally programmed to seek this out, as it is a part of what's familiar to them, and what represents 'love', as fucked up as that is.
It isn't healthy, and she really isn't seeking sex or intimacy, sadly, she's trying to fill some void of her past.
This is one more obvious example. And i'm not saying anyone here, Dean, is like this.
if you're talking about 'horny, unstable women" that's one thing. "unstable" being the operative word. someone who is unstable obviously already has issues..
your initial statement simply suggested that wanting sex usually implies some psychological disfunction. "wanting sex a lot" was your exact quote.
so i guess, how much is a lot to you?
i don't think it's unreasonable to expect sex at least 7 to 8 times a day myself.. |
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outerloper
- FB Fan -
26 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 05:40:06
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quote:
Originally posted by interloper
We are greatly tied into our biology, and that means to make babies. When we men get google eyed for large breats, for instance, what it really means is that those large breats can feed the baby that we put in them. On the flip as well, perhaps physical strength in men means potency to women. Our lives are seemingly determined by some form of instinct, mingled with childhood experience that we learn. Men look for their mothers, Women look for their fathers. Know any gay men who have father issues? Either that they were gone, or they hate them? What about gay women? Know any gay women who are missing mothers in some degree? It's not a knock on homosexuality, it makes sense. My one and only true stalker that I ever had used to swear up and down that I looked exactly like her father. I never saw the poor guy. Weird. The media greatly plays on these things. We are sold products through the taunting of our biological urges. They are not stupid. They know what gets our attention. Whatever. You also have to consider that we are overpopulating ourselves at a pheonominal rate. Think about it. Two people make two more people. That's four people. The second pair makes four in total, and so on. We don't die nearly as fast as we make babies. 2x2 is 4. 4x4 is 8. 8x8 is 16. You get the point. I don't know...I really have no idea what my point is. Im a guy, and I really, really love girls, but regardless of how many Saturday nights I spend doing sound in bars surrounded by scantilly clad females, I remain totally loyal to my girlfriend, and will never have a problem doing so, unless of course it's done to me. I guess I just wish humans could evolve a bit. There has to be something more to all of this besides the instinct to further our genes, because it's kind of pointless. Especially seeing as how we may eventually evolve into one big gas mask. I dunno, read a book or something. Watch 2001. Whatever. Everyone needs to think more.
Remember that movie "Enemy Mine"? The alien species reproduced naturally without intercourse, and when they did, the parent died to control the population. Interesting.
I have to cut this short, Jennifer Lopez's butt is on tv.
shit-dang
I love it when you get all deep
Did I mention I have great hips for breeding? |
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J Mascis
- FB Fan -
USA
205 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 05:42:28
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| I would not only refuse to date a girl who wouldn't have regular sexual intercourse with me, I also wouldn't date one who refused to let me tickle her colon with my tube steak. Refusing the latter, always results in a donkey punch and that always leads to a vaginal bronco fuck. I also would never date a woman who would not let me ram my hog down her windpipe. |
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apl4eris
~ Abstract Brain ~
USA
4800 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 06:25:16
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Ahh, I see Mr. Mascis, that you don't need a girl, you need gammon flaps n. 1. Hole in a farmhouse door through which pigs come and go at will. 2. Beef curtains (qv). Also known as gammon goalposts.
"You're just a 6 piece chicken Mc-Nothing!"
-Space Ghost |
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glacial906
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1738 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 07:15:48
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7 to 8 times a day, floop? Hot damn but you must be like a jackrabbit.
7 to 8 times a day would be doable for a couple of days, but I don't think I could keep that up (hehe) for much longer. Are you a porno star or something? I do recall you saying you worked in movies... |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 07:28:18
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Let's just say that he goes through a lot of tabasco... :)
quote:
Originally posted by Dave Noisy
And i'm not saying anyone here, Dean, is like this.
If I didn't know better, I'd swear I'd just been cut.
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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glacial906
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1738 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 07:34:36
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7 to 8 times a day, floop? Hot damn but you must be like a jackrabbit.
7 to 8 times a day would be doable for a couple of days, but I don't think I could keep that up (hehe) for much longer. Are you a porno star or something? I do recall you saying you worked in movies... |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 09:02:22
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glacial, i'm constantly erect. what can i say. it's a blessing and a curse. a blessing because i'm a hit with the ladies, but a curse because i can never wear sweat pants.
cult of frank, is there something i don't know about Tabasco sauce? whatchutalkinabout? |
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Coldheartofstone
* Dog in the Sand *
Canada
2025 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 09:09:02
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Is that a snickers bar in your pocket??
buenos tardes amigos... |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 09:19:29
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I don't have a clue where I heard it, but somewhere I read something about Ron Jeremy or someone using tabasco (I think up the tail pipe, not on the smoke stack) to get blood rushing there and give him a permerection for those long hours of filming. Something in the neighbourhood of a few hours, anyway...
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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floop
= Wannabe Volunteer =
Mexico
15297 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2003 : 09:52:23
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| oh, and no, i don't work in porno glacial. i'm actually working on a Disney film right now, which is about as far from porno as you can get. |
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