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Mad Dawg Posted - 03/17/2004 : 10:33:26
Having browsed this forum for a few days, I am thinking of becoming a guru. Lots of you need help, direction, and a father figure. I will only accept students/children who have or are planning to do something, anyting, noteworthy with their life.
35   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
Slick Posted - 03/27/2004 : 14:55:49
Wisdom!
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/25/2004 : 22:14:29
quote:
Originally posted by KingOfSiam

Many levels of crumbling noteworthiness... Oh help me enlightened one!



KingOfSiam, some people are just not destined for greatness. This should not effect your self esteem. It sounds like you, perhaps through your own efforts, (with some help from the Almighty one), are enjoying a wonderful life. Hopefully you have given up smoking.
Focus on gratitude and the moment. If there are days where you percieve little to be grateful for, ponder this thought, you could have been born French!!!!
Homers_pet_monkey Posted - 03/25/2004 : 13:50:02
Your link doesn't work

Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!!
KingOfSiam Posted - 03/25/2004 : 08:07:49
I am not balding or fat and I have nice teeth - there is a link in my profile to a pic with Frank.

I work all the time to make alot of money to take care of my family, provide a nice house, cars, food, etc. and all of my noteworthiness has been put on the back burner.

I do enjoy my current job and it certianly pays better than my experience in the entertainment business.

I was a professional performer at Walt Disney World and I was a performer in a Broadway musical called "Will Roger's Follies" both engagements were about 1.5 years in length. It was fun but alot of work.

And yes I have sang at many weddings only because close friends have asked me.
bedrock_barney Posted - 03/25/2004 : 01:28:57
quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000

Aha, but the world champ a couple of years was Raymond Barneveld, from Holland. Imaginatively nicknamed (in time honoured darts fashion)... Barney.
Sweet.


"Join The Cult Of Wormy Cheese Man/In Ten Words Or Less"



Cool guy, that Barney


"I've rejoined the Cult of Ming / Star of favourite childhood movie of 1980"
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/25/2004 : 00:11:10
KingOfSiam I need to know a couple of things. Do you work so hard as a replacement for past unhealthy obsessions or is it because you have bills to pay? Are you working doing something you enjoy? Do you consider yourself an artist? Are you earning more than you need for a comfortable living? Who was it that told you you had a "butter" voice? When you said "professional" singer did you mean you sang at weddings? Pubs?
Concerts? Did I hear you on the radio (Clear channel stations only. College radio doesn't count)

Cheeseman made an interesting observation about dart players being fat. I will also need to know if you're fat. Bald or balding? Being from the USA I suppose we don't have to worry about your teeth.
Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/24/2004 : 11:49:03
Aha, but the world champ a couple of years was Raymond Barneveld, from Holland. Imaginatively nicknamed (in time honoured darts fashion)... Barney.
Sweet.


"Join The Cult Of Wormy Cheese Man/In Ten Words Or Less"
Adnan_le_Terrible Posted - 03/24/2004 : 11:42:11
quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000

Darts, cool. Are you fat, cos it seems to be a prerequisite...


"Join The Cult Of Wormy Cheese Man/In Ten Words Or Less"



Being British is another prerequisite.



Have some wine, please, don't run away.
Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/24/2004 : 11:40:06
Darts, cool. Are you fat, cos it seems to be a prerequisite...


"Join The Cult Of Wormy Cheese Man/In Ten Words Or Less"
KingOfSiam Posted - 03/24/2004 : 07:07:59
Many levels of crumbling noteworthiness...

I was a professional singer for a couple years and now the smoking has taken its toll on my beautiful butter voice.

I was a nationally ranked (18) dart player and now because I work so much I have no time to practice.

...Just a taste (there's more) of my crumbling noteworthiness

Oh help me enlightened one!
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/23/2004 : 23:00:32
quote:
Originally posted by KingOfSiam

My noteworthyness has crumbled into a pile of shit and only the glorious Mad Dawg can help me now - I just know it!



I'm sure I can help you my child but you will need to be more specific. I am a Guru, not a psychic. Perhaps we could start with what you did that was noteworthy before you world crumbled.
VoVat Posted - 03/23/2004 : 15:41:56
quote:
The only thing noteworthy I've done is spitting a mouthfull of chocolate cookie high on wall in college when I was twelve. Five years later it was still there.


It's a permanent monument to your accomplishment!



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.
KingOfSiam Posted - 03/23/2004 : 10:39:25
My noteworthyness has crumbled into a pile of shit and only the glorious Mad Dawg can help me now - I just know it!

Perhaps one day I could be guided to carve soft metals into shapes resembling skulls and other "hardcore" artifacts, oh please help me most noteworthy guru!
remig Posted - 03/23/2004 : 01:20:10
The only thing noteworthy I've done is spitting a mouthfull of chocolate cookie high on wall in college when I was twelve. Five years later it was still there.



_\_/_
(°L°)
_¤¤¤_
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/23/2004 : 00:56:00
quote:
Originally posted by GoddessTheory

I was wondering if you could post a link to the silver jewlery site. I want a ring made of Me eating a cheeseburger with a fork and a knife while wearing a Kaiser Helmet.

Guru that up for me when you can, guru.



GT I would like to help but my dance ticket is FULL. I am trying to catch up on orders for Malibu's two most noteworthy Irishmen (Advanced Celtic knot designs) before my pilgrimage to Dolphinquest on Oahu.

On a side note I was just credited as spirtual advisor on a film I feel will be sweeping the academy next year. Perhaps one of the mods will bend the rules and allow me to post a link.
The Calistanian Posted - 03/22/2004 : 14:20:16
I'm already a guru, in general. Just a plain old guru.

I'm a fsh with no i's.
Adnan_le_Terrible Posted - 03/22/2004 : 14:18:24
Mad Dawg honey, open yourself to LOOOOOVE!

I know you're not the jerk you pretend to be. Let's just all love each others. Isn't the world too horrible nowadays? Why wasting our time hating each other when we can just build a monument of love on this forum.



signed : Adnan's mom
GoddessTheory Posted - 03/22/2004 : 14:17:06
I was wondering if you could post a link to the silver jewlery site. I want a ring made of Me eating a cheeseburger with a fork and a knife while wearing a Kaiser Helmet.

Guru that up for me when you can, guru.
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/22/2004 : 14:11:31
One of the things I will be doing as a Guru is taking average humans and making them intersting and noteworthy. Instead of devoting precious time to critiquing and becoming experts on other people's music and accomplishments, they will be busy living thier own interesting, as opposed to mundane, lives.

Slick my child, I will soon contact you about a secret website where my devotees will meet to recieve daily inspiration and direction from me. I don't want you spending too much time here absorbing all the negative energy.

Guru Mad Dawg
Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/21/2004 : 01:00:50
Maybe its more interesting.


"Join The Cult Of Frank/In Ten Words Or Less"
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/20/2004 : 22:45:30
Isn't this thread getting a little off topic? What does Ella Guru have to do with me being anyone's Guru? I am here to help you!
Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/20/2004 : 08:32:34
quote:
Originally posted by benji

quote:
Originally posted by VoVat

What about Ella Guru?



ahh...these fellows opened for A Silver Mount Zion the other week.
unfortunately i only caught their last song...but it was very very nice.

thanks for the link.


update: i've actually just ordered their ep for £2.99
can't go wrong for £3.



"I joined the Cult of Frank / I think that man deserves a DB!"


I got it too after seeing them at the same show, and its certainly worth 3 squid. Really beautiful songs. Definitely looking forward to their album.


"Join The Cult Of Frank/In Ten Words Or Less"
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/19/2004 : 23:38:11
quote:
Originally posted by VoVat

I really don't know any Beefheart songs besides that one, and I only really know it because XTC covered it.



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.



You didn't like XTC did you?
benji Posted - 03/19/2004 : 02:52:59
quote:
Originally posted by VoVat

What about Ella Guru?



ahh...these fellows opened for A Silver Mount Zion the other week.
unfortunately i only caught their last song...but it was very very nice.

thanks for the link.


update: i've actually just ordered their ep for £2.99
can't go wrong for £3.



"I joined the Cult of Frank / I think that man deserves a DB!"
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/18/2004 : 22:26:35
quote:
Originally posted by VoVat

I really don't know any Beefheart songs besides that one, and I only really know it because XTC covered it.



Really?
VoVat Posted - 03/18/2004 : 18:42:08
I really don't know any Beefheart songs besides that one, and I only really know it because XTC covered it.



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.
Slick Posted - 03/18/2004 : 16:12:34
Beefheart? You must be old to know a Beefheart song. Mad Dawg you have already helped me. The Vodka worked great.

Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/18/2004 : 16:09:45
Imagine Low doing Neil Young songs, maybe.
www.bananarecordings.com



"Join The Cult Of Frank/In Ten Words Or Less"
VoVat Posted - 03/18/2004 : 16:02:15
They're named after a Captain Beefheart song. I've heard the song before, but I don't think I've ever heard anything by that band.



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.
Cheeseman1000 Posted - 03/18/2004 : 10:19:35
quote:
Originally posted by VoVat

What about Ella Guru?



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.


Tell me you're talking about the band! Please, they're fantastic!
I know they're named after something, but I can't remember what...


"Join The Cult Of Frank/In Ten Words Or Less"
Mad Dawg Posted - 03/17/2004 : 21:41:21
quote:
Originally posted by Slick

I've always wanted to be in a cult. I finally signed up for the forum just to join. What are the fees? You will make a great guru TC. BTW you make the best skulls in the whole world. Love your website. Do you think you can help me do something noteworthy with my life? I play guitar better than most people but have serious stage fright. I don't want to end up like these losers here. Advice?



Bless you my child. There are no fees. Try vodka for the nerves. LEt me know how it goes.
NimrodsSon Posted - 03/17/2004 : 19:27:56
Jesus H. Christ, MadDog! How fucking obvious can you make it...putting Hank Williams, Jr. for the name and your website in the cool links. At least try to make it believable


¡Viva los Católicos!
mun chien andalusia Posted - 03/17/2004 : 19:18:44
what about NOT registering fake nicks in order to support stupid threads?


join the cult of errol\and you can have a beer\without having to quit smoking
VoVat Posted - 03/17/2004 : 18:57:16
What about Ella Guru?



Join the Culf of Buttoms / Correctly spelled cults are so passé.
darwin Posted - 03/17/2004 : 15:00:54
Bye bye. Nice knowing you.

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