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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

USA
5454 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  12:53:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
This is a marriage contract drawn up by some sick bastard in Iowa. Entertaining given that the wife didn't sign it.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0217062contract1.html

Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~

Spain
2674 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  13:02:00  Show Profile  Click to see Newo's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
But look at all the points he awarded for unexpected anal. How could she refuse?

--


Buy your best friend flowers. Buy your lover a beer. Covet thy father. Covet thy neighbour's father. Honour thy lover's beer. Covet thy neighbour's father's wife's sister. Take her to bingo night.
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =

Canada
11687 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  13:12:02  Show Profile  Visit Cult_Of_Frank's Homepage  Reply with Quote
I thought I would be able to make a joke about it or find it funny but I can't. It's like, I know in theory the concept is ludicrously funny, but really, that someone out there would write that up and potentially some poor sap would sign it, it makes me sick. Still, very interesting, thanks Darwin.


"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominos will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."
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Newo
~ Abstract Brain ~

Spain
2674 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  13:24:34  Show Profile  Click to see Newo's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
For me, humour is the only comeback in the presence of sick behaviour.

--


Buy your best friend flowers. Buy your lover a beer. Covet thy father. Covet thy neighbour's father. Honour thy lover's beer. Covet thy neighbour's father's wife's sister. Take her to bingo night.
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BLT
> Teenager of the Year <

South Sandwich Islands
4204 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  16:16:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I bet Travis watches a lot of porn.
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Daisy Girl
~ Abstract Brain ~

Belize
5305 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  21:22:49  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Gosh, the warning scared me off from reading the document. Sounds like a sick puppy.
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PixieSteve
> Teenager of the Year <

Poland
4698 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  21:43:32  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
permanent menstruation would pwn that contract




Edited by - PixieSteve on 02/21/2006 21:44:05
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =

Canada
11687 Posts

Posted - 02/21/2006 :  22:01:11  Show Profile  Visit Cult_Of_Frank's Homepage  Reply with Quote
hahahahahaha, seriously I haven't laughed that hard at a post in a while.


"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominos will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."
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VoVat
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<

USA
9168 Posts

Posted - 02/24/2006 :  11:59:08  Show Profile  Visit VoVat's Homepage  Click to see VoVat's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
I love how he makes an exception to clothing rules for church. It's just so far out in left field that this guy would be religious, yet it still somehow fits.



"If you doze much longer, then life turns to dreaming. If you doze much longer, then dreams turn to nightmares."
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =

USA
876 Posts

Posted - 02/25/2006 :  22:08:47  Show Profile  Visit jimmy's Homepage  Reply with Quote
You know, you watch TV sitcoms or drama shows all your life and then you go out into the world with this idea everyone is basically the same, normal, with the same ideas of what is right and wrong. And then you see this guy, who looks normal, but is secretly such a freak. The funny thing is, we know about this because he put it in writing, but I bet there's hundreds of guys that do crazy shit like that, only it's not on paper.

Last summer, one Saturday night after midnight I was walking around by the college and this guy who was walking on the other side of the street crossed over and started a conversation with me. He looked pretty normal, in his late 30's. I never would talk to a stranger like that, but he was one of those friendly, church-type people, so it's hard to be rude. He told me about how he used to work for local radio stations. He was looking for a friend, even asking me if I wanted to go with him the following night to his Baptist church.

I wasn't looking for a friend, just trying to make sure that when we said goodbye and went our seperate ways, we were as far from where I lived as possible. He seemed harmless, but there was no way I wanted him to know my address.

While we were talking about radio, Howard Stern came up. This guy Steve said, in all seriousness,"That show is obscene, that guy needs to be yanked off the air." which shocked me because I'd never seen anyone, in real life, actually advocate censorship.

Anyway, we finally said goodbye, far, far from my house, and the whole way home I looked over my shoulder.

I only saw him one other time- that was when the local newspaper printed the names, pictures, addresses and crimes of all the guys who had recently registered as sex offenders. He had had sex with a 13 year old boy.
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danjersey
> Teenager of the Year <

USA
2792 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2006 :  00:04:38  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
is that a dream
is that
a dream
?
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jimmy
= Cult of Ray =

USA
876 Posts

Posted - 02/26/2006 :  00:35:57  Show Profile  Visit jimmy's Homepage  Reply with Quote
What I wrote? No that really happened. Yeah I had taken a lot of stuff that night but that doesn't affect my memory.

"Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you." JOHN 15:14
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