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 I just pooped a toblerone....
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shineoftheever
> Teenager of the Year <

Canada
4307 Posts

Posted - 12/25/2005 :  18:31:10  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
and other christmas stories.

please share your christmas stories.

I Just Pooped a Toblerone - By shineoftheever

the only time i ever eat toblerone is at christmas. i don't know why, you can get them all year, it's probably 'cause they make my crap stink so bad when mixed with the christmas breakfast and christmas dinners i guess. i'm normally not super stinky, could be the nougat, i dunno. i'm thankful my poop came out regular shaped and not triangular, that might have hurt. the end.


The waxworks were an immensely eloquent dissertation on the wonderful ordinariness of mankind.

Edited by - shineoftheever on 12/25/2005 18:35:20

pixiestu
> Teenager of the Year <

United Kingdom
2564 Posts

Posted - 12/26/2005 :  03:50:00  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
What a lovely story...

"The arc of triumph"
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hammerhands
* Dog in the Sand *

Canada
1594 Posts

Posted - 12/26/2005 :  04:11:11  Show Profile  Visit hammerhands's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Yeah he's just like Gipp Forster.
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The King Of Karaoke
> Teenager of the Year <

USA
3759 Posts

Posted - 12/26/2005 :  08:52:12  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
My Christmas poop - By The King Of Karaoke
My Christmas poop was just as rancid as all my other poops. I've never had toblerone. Nor did I have any Christmas dinner or breakfast. I had chicken and shrimp fried rice, a beer and seven pieces of baklava. I normally have to relieve myself four to five times a day depending on what I've eaten. The shape is... Well... Just have the brush and plunger handy that's all. I'm normally super stinky and it's never had anything to do with nouga,... Uuuhhhh, Oohh God! I gotta go blow it up right now!

The end


Edited by - The King Of Karaoke on 12/26/2005 08:54:35
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HeywoodJablome
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1485 Posts

Posted - 12/26/2005 :  10:30:10  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
And who says we're running out of things to talk about in this forum? Shame on you!
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Suicide_Samurai
= Cult of Ray =

United Kingdom
431 Posts

Posted - 12/26/2005 :  16:56:31  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Four to five shits a day?! I pray for you.
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Doog
* Dog in the Sand *

United Kingdom
1220 Posts

Posted - 12/27/2005 :  04:40:56  Show Profile  Visit Doog's Homepage  Click to see Doog's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
My Christmas Poop - by Doog

I've had the runs for the last week. No idea why. Possibly raised beer intake. Xmas day, I managed to shake it off in the shape of a turd which must have LITERALLY been 50cm long at least. And this, was my bestest Christmas everest.

"Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, morecambe and wise"
www.myspace.com/doog - www.doog.tk
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Doog
* Dog in the Sand *

United Kingdom
1220 Posts

Posted - 12/27/2005 :  14:45:46  Show Profile  Visit Doog's Homepage  Click to see Doog's MSN Messenger address  Reply with Quote
I've really gone too far.

"Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, morecambe and wise"
www.myspace.com/doog - www.doog.tk
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pixiestu
> Teenager of the Year <

United Kingdom
2564 Posts

Posted - 12/27/2005 :  15:07:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I wouldn't say too far, but far enough!

"The arc of triumph"
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TRANSMARINE
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
2002 Posts

Posted - 12/27/2005 :  16:16:56  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
When I was young, I made a neighbor girl eat some poop by telling her it was chocolate. I didn't specify Toblerone, and it wasn't triangular...nevertheless I sold her on the possibility.

It began very natural. I approached her with the fudgy treat I had collected from my backyard. After she became suspicious of the odor of the 'chocolate' smeared on the end of a piece of rebar I was poking in her face, she recoiled in horror and disgust.

"No, really...it's chocolate...I swear!"

This still didn't satisfy (or even come close to assuring) her, and I had better things to do than spend all these minutes mustering up acting abilities over such a trivial matter...so...I took the liberties of smearing the Hershy'd rebar end against her lips.

Of course she immediately was aware that what was pressed against her sustenance aperture was far from a dark confection, and after flitting about and gagging uncontrollably, the girl fled in tears to her house. I was filled with satisfaction until I remembered her house was my immediate neighboring house...and even though I was an older child than her (she was 5) fear and guilt overwhelmed me and I sweated and trembled in fear of punishment like no other sixteen year old had or has since.

Hank the 8th was a duplicated man

-bRIAN
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HeywoodJablome
* Dog in the Sand *

USA
1485 Posts

Posted - 12/27/2005 :  17:04:15  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Damn, that's messed up Tranny! The worst I ever did was give a group of friends dog jerky and told them it was Oberto or some shit. They didn't like it too much when they found out (I brilliantly told them to their face while they were chewing on it) and I had to do some serious laying low for a while fearing a quadruple tag team beat down. I don't what their poop looked like though (to stay with the theme of thread).
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