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Llamadance
> Teenager of the Year <
United Kingdom
2543 Posts |
 Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:30:30
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So, the in-laws are visiting this weekend, and it may or may not be fun. See, last time we were down there, my wife and I had a blazing row, which culminated in me getting the hell outta Dodge and staying in a hotel for the night.
I like both of them , but my wife has quite a large family who all live close to her parents, so when we visit, it ends up with loads of sisters/husbands/kids and cousins running about. As I come from a relatively small (and not close) family this always sets me on edge, which can often end up in arguments. My wife also knows that I get on edge, and so is anticipating the rise of the dark side, which makes it all worse. Consequently, she gets on edge before they visit. It's a vicious circle 
Anyway, enough catharsis, how do you get on with your in-laws? Love them? Hate them? Or even worse, do you just not give a flying fuck about them? Please tell me and cheer me up:)
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We know what we are
Absolutely barking stars |
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prozacrat
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1186 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:36:11
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| I guess it can really depend. I'm not married, but I've had a few serious girlfriends, which can, at times, feel pretty similar in some regards, I would assume. That would include her parents/family. Sometimes I get along with them really well and they just love me to death. In another case, the parents probably liked me, but could not understand me if their lives depended on it. But regardless, I've just kept in mind that it's the family that made the girl I'm with, so no matter whether I get along with them or not, I appreciate them for that fact. Does that help/make sense? I hope it's some consolation, especially from someone who hasn't been married. |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:40:08
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My inlaws are as much fun as .... uuuurgh I can't even think of anything boring enough.
It's something I've only just noticed. |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:46:54
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| My In-Laws are pretty good. My wife has a very extended family with divorces and remarriages which was bizarre to me since my parents have stayed together and I never had much contact with other parts of my family. Her mom died when my wife was a kid, so I never met her. Her dad was a good guy, but unfortunately died a few years ago. His second wife is a good grandma to our kids. She use to drive me a bit crazy because she had to run things and be the center of the action, but since her husband died she has matured alot and is now fun to be around. The worse part of my wife's family is aunt's on both sides. I'm terrible at faking that I like someone. I can't even look at people I don't like and I can't carry a conversation with them. So, family functions with them are a strain. |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:50:13
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| I do love them and my sister in law has a special place in my heart but they are just such a dry bunch. Everything has to be structured and planned to within an inch of it's life. |
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Llamadance
> Teenager of the Year <
United Kingdom
2543 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:52:21
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prozocrat - yeah, I think my in-laws like me, but don't get me, even after 13 years. You're right, they did help make my wife who she is, but I guess like all families, they gave her the hang-ups and insecurities too. I think maybe with bigger families there's more scope for that stuff...
And for this thread I think in-laws can mean parents of girl/boy friends.
Surfer - tofu?
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We know what we are
Absolutely barking stars |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 14:57:54
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Good topic. I don't know if I can offer any help or advice.
I had a hideous relationship with my own parents, so it is the biggest blessing
that my in-laws rock. Sadly, my mom-in-law died a couple of years ago.
But I do think that if she were around my life would be very
different. For one thing, I think I'd be divorced from her son,
which is a weird thing to say and a long story.
It must suck to have in-laws you can't stand. Sorry, guys.
 I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
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starmekitten
-= Forum Pistolera =-
United Kingdom
6370 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:00:20
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my exes mother thought I was a chubby manic weirdo
how do I know this
she told me thats how
I guess I can now see why her boy is such a prince
*cough*
I hope that I will live to see you undress |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:02:40
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| It's not so much that I can't stand them, it's just that I come from a very open and relaxed family. My mom is the kind of mom who my friends and brothers friends stop by to see and stay with before seeing their own parents whenever they're in the country. It's a big change to go from that to what I have now. |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:08:51
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What a fucking bitch!
(tre's ex's mom)
I actually won an award for a piece I wrote about my mother-in-law. She was exactly as you describe your mom,
Nicole. Just the coolest, most relaxed person. Plus, she
got a martini glass tattooed on her ankle right before she died.
I don't have a single tat, but she got one!
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
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Surfer Rosa
> Teenager of the Year <
4209 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:11:08
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| Ooh Tre that is nasty! A friend of mine's mother-in-law asked who the father was when she told her she was pregnant. |
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Llamadance
> Teenager of the Year <
United Kingdom
2543 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:19:38
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quote:
Originally posted by kathryn
But I do think that if she were around my life would be very
different. For one thing, I think I'd be divorced from her son,
which is a weird thing to say and a long story.
Ha, that struck a chord. My wife's parents is probably the topic my wife and I have argued most about over the time we've been together. A week before visiting or being visited, you can guarantee we'll be fighting more than usual. Then it escalates beyond that and then we end up arguing about how to argue It's all pretty daft really.
Darwin, how does your wife deal with the strained family gatherings? Does it upset her?
Tre - save that for a long time, let it stew and exact revenge when they're least expecting it. (if you haven't already)
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We know what we are
Absolutely barking stars |
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darwin
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
USA
5454 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 15:32:48
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quote:
Originally posted by Llamadance
Darwin, how does your wife deal with the strained family gatherings? Does it upset her?
My wife is great. She knows her aunts are annoying and she tries to keep the visits short or even turns down offers that would mean spending more time with those parts of the family (like weekends up at Lake Tahoe). It's just the aunts, so it's not so bad.
Probably the hardest family thing for us is my brother-in-law (my sister's husband). The dude is seriously loud and seems to always screaming at their 3 kids. We only see them during Xmas, but after a few days my wife is ready to flee the house. I always teased my wife about her having the chaotic family and then one Christmas my mom and brother-in-law got into a yelling match, my sister and him (and kids) left to go home, and my dad got all emotionally upset. It was kind of shocking to see that my family isn't ALL that stable. |
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kathryn
~ Selkie Bride ~
Belgium
15320 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 16:51:51
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Llamadance, I meant that in a totally different way. There's never
been any arguing surrounding my in-laws and I feel so bad
for those of you who suffer thru that.
That said, my friggin' brother-in-law? Total freak show. Worse
than being loud and yelling at kids ... the first time he
met me, he crawled into bed with me and put the moves on
me. TOTALLY FREAKY. Needless to say, we've only spoken
at a funeral. Asshole.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
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prozacrat
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1186 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2005 : 23:10:02
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| Um... Yeah, kathryn. That's creepy. I'm just going to pretend that said "TOTALLY FREAKY" incident occured AT a funeral. That'd be even freakier. |
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Carolynanna
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Canada
6556 Posts |
Posted - 06/01/2005 : 07:04:40
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My mom-in-law is awesome. She has 4 boys and no girls so she loves me.
Sometimes she'll send me a present in the mail and none for Mike, heh.
She also is always on my side no matter what.
For the most part the rest of the freakshow leaves us alone...
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This is the war and not the warning. |
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Frog in the Sand
-+ Le premiere frog +-
France
2715 Posts |
Posted - 06/01/2005 : 08:54:24
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My in-laws live in a small, remote mountain town they almost never leave, and since I tend to avoid small, remote towns I don't see them very often. They respect me and I respect them, I can even say our relations are good, but we obviously don't live on the same planet. They're afraid of city life, I can't stand country life. They've never read a book in their lives, I live in books and couldn't live without them. They would have liked their daughter to marry a 'simple' guy and live next to them, she lives with an 'artist' in a fuckin' big city :(
But to be honest 1) my mother-in-law is a real cordon bleu; 2) I'm not very close to my parents either.
When will Frank find Lyle, Nick and Eric Drew again? |
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The In-Laws
