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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
 Posted - 11/16/2003 : 20:14:34
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Hey everyone,
My wife just won the case deciding who got everything in the settlement. So now I have to give her all the furniture, the house, and even our two cats, Flotsam and Jetsam. (Like the eels from the Little Mermaid.) It totally sucks. We seemed so happy together, at least I thought we did, and then last year she started getting very withdrawn and quiet...we used to excercise together, because we are both somewhat overweight, and go on hikes in the mountains and everything...typical married stuff. She stopped doing all that, and when I would ask her if anything was wrong she would just reply that she was stressed out from work. Which is understandable because she's an accountant for a somewhat successful law firm. Anyway, we got further and further apart, until both our schedules prevented us from hardly seeing each other at all, but the shitty thing was that neither of us mentioned it, even though I think we both knew something was wrong. The reason I was so busy was because we had started filming a new show about Napoleon Bonaparte and the French Revolution. The beginning of filming is always a horribly busy time, but we had dealt with it before. But it was different now.
So last December around the holidays I was poking around our bedroom, looking for the stash of Christmas presents. (I know I shouldn't have, but I cannot resist!) Anyway, I looked in the enranceway to the attic which is in the cieling of our room and found it! But upon searching through the stash I found a present for a guy whom I did not know, and whose name I will not divulge here but whom I will call "Steve." I thought maybe it was for one of her co-workers, but they had already had their Christmas party that year and she had given and recieved presents with almost everyone in her office. So I opened it. (I know I shouldn't have, but..) Anyway inside was a necklace, a very expensive-looking and nice one, from "Sylvan's Jewelers" which is a place in my small town. I didn't confront her about it then, but I didn't put it back either, that asshole Steve wasn't going to get a present from my wife! We spent the holiday in almost complete silence, because she knew that the gift was gone but she couldn't bring it up. What was she supposed to say, "Honey, did you see a gift for my lover anywhere up in the attic?" Of course not.
Well, New Years rolled around, and nothing got any better. We went out with some friends on New Years Eve, and my wife left me at the restaurant we went to with a bunch of friends. She came back, but when she did her hair was all disheveled. I thought that maybe she had gone out to see her new man, but I kept my mouth shut. I just sat back quietly and drank my vermouth.
Anyway, eventually the cat was let out of the bag, because one day in early February a co-worker of mine whom I will call "Juliette" started coming on to me and I told her about my situation. I told her I needed to check it over with my wife first, but that it probably should be okay. So I asked her about it and she admitted to seeing Steve. We seemed pretty civil at first, but then later at the divorce lawyer's office some pretty heated stuff came up about what belonged to whom, and hence the divorce trial.
Well, Juliette and I have seen each other on and off since then, but nothing that serious. I pretty much hang out by myself when I'm not at work and drink vermouth and listen to Frank Black and a few other bands. I'm not telling you all this stuff to get pity, just to vent after a horrible, frustrating day.
Thanks for listening.
I guess I'll need a new signature now, since I should start getting on with my life, huh?
 My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
-- Anon |
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realmeanmotorscutor
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1764 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 20:42:32
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I'm sorry to read all of this Hordack. I remember you mentioning this in the Christians/Atheists thread but your comment was so brief I wasn't sure if you were serious or not. Writing these things out can help; talking to someone is usually better. I hope this "Juliette" helps or a friend perhaps. I won't give you pity (as you specifically didn't ask for) because you actually are better off. Better to be free to explore your life and live it fully than live chained by a strained marriage. I hope things improve for you. Get a new cat!! :) Cats help.
Let me know when you get the cat and what you named it. You have your orders.
 "I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye" |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 20:54:57
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Well, I didn't really renounce God as I said there, that was just an extreme reaction to an extreme day.
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
-- Anon |
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realmeanmotorscutor
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1764 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:03:28
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Glad to hear it. It's only my opinion but I think that's a good thing. I'm no Jesus freak and I don't think God will help you through this but looking to good things will.
"I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye" |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:18:36
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Cool, realmeanmotorscutor...I feel a real kindredship with you because your pic is Lion-O, and my username is Hordak...
GO eighties cartoons!!!!!!
(Although I was like, in my teens when all these shows were out..!)
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
-- Anon |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:19:11
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I love the new signature.
As far as the wife goes, it sounds like you really got shuffled a poor deck. She has an affair AND gets all the possessions?! On what planet do we live that we are so bent on equality that we abandon all semblances of fairness?
Yeah, I'm mad for you too.
I could go on and on about treachery and betrayal and the negative things, having been there, but in the end you will find yourself thinking it better off. You will perhaps learn from any mistakes you might have made (not suggesting you have, and certainly not that this is in anyway remotely anybody's fault but your self-centred heartless ex-spouse, but nobody's perfect), and move on to be and meet a better person (perhaps you've already started along this path?) and she will forever be in a rut of looking for the next person. She will leave this Steve for someone else, and then someone else, until she realizes, too late, that she has grown too old to leave the man she merely had a passing crush on and is stuck for the rest of her life either alone or with someone she will eventually grow to hate.
And you'll have a story to tell the kids when you've found a woman with a functioning heart.
 "Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:37:30
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Thanks for your kind words, Cult of Frank. You sound as though you have lived through alot of turmoil in your past, too. If you don't mind my asking, how old are you? I just wonder because you sound like how I would like to feel about the situation -- hopefully how I will feel after I get through all this. Anyway, thank you for the words of hope.
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
-- Anon |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:46:01
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My new, hopeful for the future signature:
If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. |
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Chip Away Boy
= Cult of Ray =
914 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 21:51:37
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| sorry dude, why did she get all the shit? |
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glacial906
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1738 Posts |
Posted - 11/16/2003 : 22:56:57
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Hey Hordak,
Sorry to hear about your woman woes. It's good that you're already starting to look forward to living your life on your own terms. You seem like a pretty smart guy, I'm sure you'll do fine without her, whoever she was.
My dad got divorced a few years ago from my mom, and he kind of went on the rebound after that -- I think it kind of did him some good in the long run. He went out and met new people and realized that just because he had been married did not mean he was dead to the world.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
Carl Sagan
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 00:07:54
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Thank you for the kind words, glacial906
Hordak Says:
If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. |
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glacial906
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1738 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 00:09:13
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I like the new sig.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
Carl Sagan
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 01:53:37
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I know we've had disagreements on the Christians v Atheists thread, and I know that I can't fully sympathise with you because I (fortunately) haven't been through that experience. But best wishes, my friend, I'm sure everything is gonna work out fine. Keep us posted on developments, as my good friend Bob Hoskins would say, its good to talk.
Also, I would recommend a dog rather than a cat, they're blatantly better
 "I have joined the Cult Of Frank/And I have dearly paid"
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 06:15:55
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Thanks Cheeseman. I don't hold debate as a reason to not like somebody. Everyone's got disagreements on something!
Hordak Says:
If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 10:00:11
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quote:
Originally posted by Hordak
Thanks for your kind words, Cult of Frank. You sound as though you have lived through alot of turmoil in your past, too. If you don't mind my asking, how old are you? I just wonder because you sound like how I would like to feel about the situation -- hopefully how I will feel after I get through all this. Anyway, thank you for the words of hope.
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
-- Anon
Well, I'm actually only 23, but I've been a resident therapist for many friends as well as myself so collectively, I'd say my equivalent age is... carry the two <mutter mutter 5 mutter > ... 53.
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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realmeanmotorscutor
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1764 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 10:39:39
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quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000
Also, I would recommend a dog rather than a cat, they're blatantly better
don't even go there!
"I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye" |
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jbstevens
- FB Fan -
United Kingdom
102 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 11:00:11
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quote:
Originally posted by realmeanmotorscutor
quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000
Also, I would recommend a dog rather than a cat, they're blatantly better
don't even go there!
"I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye"
Depends what you want from them. I remember a stand-up gig with the British comedian Jack Dee. He was pointing out how with a dog, when you're doing DIY he'll paw at your legs, jump up at you, tongue hanging out, and you know that he's trying to say "I love you, I love you, I love you, lets go for a walk".
Whereas a cat will sit accross the other side of the room perfectly still watching you, thinking "you stupid bastard, you need a size 8 rawlplug in there, and I'd get a carbide tipped drill-bit if I were you.."
Whichever you choose, dog or cat (or even iguana) hope things start looking up.
"Life brings us to who we need" (Jeff Buckley)
"Yellow fifty-two / He's an undertaker bee" |
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rockathon
- FB Fan -
241 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 12:21:18
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here's a letter I sent to an ex named Irma ... you can have it:
Dear Irma:
I know the counsellor said we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore. The day you left, I swore I'd never talk to you again. But that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first one to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always you who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that.
But now I see that my pride's cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you. I don't care about looking bad anymore. I don't care who makes the first move as long as one of us does. Maybe it's time we let our hearts speak as loudly as our hurt. And this is what my heart says... "There's no one like you, Irma." I look for you in the eyes and breasts of every woman I see, but they're not you. They're not even close.
Two weeks ago, I met this girl at the Rainbow Room and brought her home with me. I don't say this to hurt you, but just to illustrate the depth of my desperation. She was young, Irma, maybe 19, with one of those perfect bodies that only youth and maybe a childhood spent ice skating can give you. I mean, just a perfect body. Tits you wouldn't believe and an ass like a tortoise shell. Every man's dream, right?
But as I sat on the couch getting a hellacious barney by this coed, I thought, look at the stuff we've made important in our lives. It's all so surface. What does a perfect body mean? Does it make her better in bed? Well, in this case, yes. But you see what I'm getting at. Does it make her a better person? Does she have a better heart than my moderately attractive Irma? I doubt it. And I'd never really thought of that before. I don't know, maybe I'm just growing up a little.
Later, after I'd tossed her about a quart of throat yogurt, I found myself thinking, "Why do I feel so drained and empty?" It wasn't just her flawless technique or her slutty, shameless hunger, but something else. Some niggling feeling of loss. Why did it feel so incomplete? And then it hit me. It didn't feel the same because you weren't there, Irma, to watch. Do you know what I mean? Nothing feels the same without you, baby. Jesus, Irma, I'm just going crazy without you. And everything I do just reminds me of you.
Do you remember Carol, that single mom we met at Mass?
Well, she drops by last week with a pan of "lasagna." She said she figured I wasn't eating right without a woman around. I didn't know what she really meant till later, but that's not the real story.
Anyway, we have a few glasses of wine and the next thing you know we're fucking in our old bedroom. And this broad's a total monster in the sack. She's giving me everything, you know like a real woman does when she's not hung up about God and her career and whether the dog can hear us. And all of a sudden she spots that tilting mirror on your grandmother's old vanity. So she puts it on the floor and we straddle it, right, so we can watch ourselves. And it's totally hot, but it makes me sad too. 'Cause I can't help thinking, "Why didn't Irma ever put the mirror on the floor? We've had this old vanity for what, 12 years, and we never used it as a sex aid." (Some of this I thought about later.) You know what I mean?
What happened to our spontaneity? You get so caught up in the routine of a marriage and you just lose sight of each other. And then you lose yourself. That's the saddest part of all for me.
But I keep thinking we can get it back. I know we can, because I only want this stuff with you. Saturday, your sister drops by with my copy of the restraining order. I mean, she's just a kid and all, but she's got a pretty good head on her shoulders. She's been a real friend to me during this painful time. She's given me lots of good counsel about you and about women in general. (She's pulling for us to get back together, Irma. She really is.) So we're drinking in the hot tub and talking about happier times. Here's this hot girl with the same DNA as you (although, let's face it, she got an extra helping of the sexy gene) and all I can do is think of how much she looks like you when you were 18. And that just about makes me cry.
And then it turns out she's really into the whole anal thing and that gets me to thinking about how many times I pressured you about trying it and how that probably fueled some of the bitterness between us. But do you see how even then, when I'm thrusting inside the steaming hot Dutch oven of your sister's cinnamon ring, all I can do is think of you? It's true, baby. In your heart you know it. Don't you think we could start over? Just wipe out all the grievances and start fresh? I think we can. I keep thinking that I think if you'd just try it, I wouldn't have to pressure you so much. Because who needs all that bitterness, Irma? It just tears us apart. And I can't be apart from you.
Because I love you, God help me but I do, please say yes.
Love,
Rockathon |
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realmeanmotorscutor
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1764 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 14:38:52
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Felt obligated to contribute a big and hardy HA HA HA
"I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye" |
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El Barto
= Song DB Master =
USA
4020 Posts |
Posted - 11/17/2003 : 22:15:50
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Dude, that's fucking hilarious. Well done. Did all of that really happen?
 "I joined the Cult of Clops / If I were you, I'd sleep with one eye open." |
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rockathon
- FB Fan -
241 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2003 : 04:48:48
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| every word of it is true, I promise |
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interloper
= Cult of Ray =
440 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2003 : 05:02:09
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| "Hellacious Barney".....HAHAHAHAHA |
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interloper
= Cult of Ray =
440 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2003 : 05:04:53
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| Hey Hordak, I haven't been married yet, but I've had a couple of perfectly good long winded relationships end because of someone else being a random lunatic so to speak. Hang in there. A close buddy of mine once gave me a very comforting piece of advice. It was "Oh well, looks like you're allowed to go hump someone fresh doesn't it?" |
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Little Black Francis
> Teenager of the Year <
3648 Posts |
Posted - 11/18/2003 : 06:01:58
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| that was beautiful rockathon, I'm cracking up |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2003 : 13:30:13
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 Hey everyone,
I got into a fight with Steve the other day, that asshole guy my wife was cheating on me with. She brought him to another one of the numerous hearings we've had to go to and he and I were left alone at one point, out smoking cigarettes. Well, he said some stuff and then stupidly I said some stuff back, and the next thing we knew I had him in a headlock and he could barely breathe. (He's quite a bit smaller than me but more in shape.) The cops that were around busted it up pretty quick and we were both arrested. Now I have a year's probation, have to spend 24 hrs in jail in a month, and have to attend anger-management seminars. This fucking sucks! But you know what? If I had it all to do again I would in a heartbeat, just to wipe that smug, haughty grin off that son of a bitch's face.
The night after I got arrested I went home and downed a whole bottle of Goldshclagger and listened over and over to Parry the Wind...High, Low. It seemed to fit the mood pretty well, even if the lyrics don't really have anything to do with my situation. I also listened to alot of Death Metal that night, too Hey, that black eye smiley is really useful right now...
Hordak Says:
Fuck that asshole Steve! Die die die motherfucker!!! |
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Cult_Of_Frank
= Black Noise Maker =
Canada
11687 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2003 : 13:53:32
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Yeah, I think that in this situation you should pretty much have the right to publically castrate him. Or at least beat the living %%@*%^#4$! out of him. Anger management? Get $^@^@*ing real. No kidding you're going to be angry. What did he get? It better have been about the same.
"Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
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Danishboy
- FB Fan -
Denmark
175 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2003 : 14:50:48
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I say Hordak rules, go kick some butt 4 the small people.
Use your super-powers on him.
Man of steel |
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Dave Noisy
Minister of Chaos
Canada
4496 Posts |
Posted - 11/19/2003 : 16:39:52
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| Um..what happened to that compassion thing? |
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Hordak
- FB Fan -
USA
180 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 00:47:02
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Sorry, Dave, I didn't mean to bring anger and sadness into the forum...it seems like such an inappropriate place for it, but I have read all sorts of personal posts from other members, like El Barto and Glacial and the whole religion thread. This forum, sadly, for me is really an outlet.
Steve's in the hospital now, it would appear that he is going to try to sue me. The rat-bastard was fine when the fight got broke up; now he is trying to sue me for injuries sustained. When we fought, I got a pretty dark shiner, (he got me good once or twice) but the damage I inflicted on him was far worse...now he is claiming that I damaged his larynx when I had him in the headlock, and his doctor is telling the courts that he might have to get a traichiotomy. (sp?) His lawyer came by my house today with pictures of Steve's throat taken shortly after the fight. (I didn't see him for a while afterwards.) The pictures were of some guys throat with all these big blotchy bruises on it. I could not have done that!!! It must have been somebody else in the photographs. But, they will be used as evidence apparently whether I like it or not.
Juliette and I went to lunch today. It was great. I think I might be falling in love with her. But, I am also worried that it is a bad time, what with the trials and the being sued and the figting and everything. Me and Juliette went to Applebees. I am supposed to go to church with her next Sunday. (Thrilling, I know..!)
Hordak Says:
Fuck that asshole Steve! Die die die motherfucker!!! |
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 00:59:09
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so uhh.. if she was the one having the affair why is she getting everything?
i hope you've learned a valuable lesson; love is bullshit. |
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Cheeseman1000
>> Denizen of the Citizens Band <<
Iceland
8201 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 01:48:42
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That had already been established, I think, Ebb.
Hordak, things seem to be going from bad to worse, and your situation truly does suck. My sympathies, and I have to agree that 'Steve' got what was coming to him.
One word of advice: don't hire Lionel Hutz as your attorney
Seriously, good luck with straightening everything out, lets hope Steve finds some new 'friends' in his time in the joint.
"I have joined the Cult Of Frank/And I have dearly paid"
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rockathon
- FB Fan -
241 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 04:59:31
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| sounds like the guy provoked you; in your emotionally sensative state, who could really blame you for losing composure. Also, those photos have to be authenticated before being admitted into evidence. I assume you have a lawyer. If the divorce guy can't handle it, get one who can or ask the court for one. |
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Ebb Vicious
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1162 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 08:03:32
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quote:
Originally posted by Cheeseman1000
That had already been established, I think, Ebb.
i scanned the thread before asking and didn't see it explained, but after your reply i went back and read more carefully and guess what? it's still not explained.
generally the person having an affair gets the short end of the stick. i don't see a reason why it should be any different in this case.
obviously, though, he's going to lose out due to being a retard and attacking someone. hurrr... but my original question still stands. why was she getting everything when she had the affair? did you represent yourself or some crap? |
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realmeanmotorscutor
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1764 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 09:45:40
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Ebb, go stab yourself.
Hordack, bravo! I would go to the hospital and finish beating the christ out of him, then I would beat the shit out of every fucking pig of a cop trying to stop you then I'd leave the state. I'm serious - you're getting shafted, leave it all behind. Beat some ass then go find inner peace.
I hope things work out with this juliette. btw, in anger management, don't say a word. Don't respond in any way - stonewall the therapist til your sessions are through.
"I joined the Cult of Popeye / The CoF required my good eye" |
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rockathon
- FB Fan -
241 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 10:21:35
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| or tell the therapist that every Rorschach inkblot test looks like your mom's pussy |
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the swimmer
* Dog in the Sand *
USA
1602 Posts |
Posted - 11/20/2003 : 10:24:02
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quote:
Originally posted by rockathon
or tell the therapist that every Rorschach inkblot test looks like your mom's pussy
ahahahahhahahhahahahahhahahahhahahaha
__________________________________________
Do you wanna touch me THEY-ER, WHEY-ER, THEY-ER |
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