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 Battle of the "Bands" - Pop Punk

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T O P I C    R E V I E W
TheCroutonFuton Posted - 08/20/2004 : 11:35:38
Alright, let me get one thing straight before we start this...If it were up to me I'd have every single "band" on this list killed. But, that takes away the choice altogether...

You're allowed to choose two of these "bands" to get slaughtered. Once you choose them tell us how you'd have them die. Be as gross and vivid as you'd like.

Good Charlotte
Sum 41
Blink-182
New Found Glory
The All American Rejects
Bowling for Soup
Simple Plan
Avril Lavigne
Linkin Park (Just for Nimrod's Son!)
McFly (For Tre.)
Busted (For Tre.)

(Wow, I had to do a lot of searching to find these names. Thankyou "Similar Artists" features of websites.)

Alright, I'd have to choose Good Charlotte and Avril Lavigne. I'd have all of Good Charlotte castrated. Once castrated they will tie Avril Lavigne up, shove their bloody testicles into her mouth, tape it shut, and plug her nose. Good Charlotte will die of blood loss and Avril Lavigne will suffocate to death with the taste of castrated Sk8er Boi balls in her mouth.

Your turn!

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic
20   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
n/a Posted - 08/21/2004 : 19:11:55
humanity is for girls

kill them all

mua ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

where did I put that copy of one hundred and twenty days of soddom? I know it's here somewhere....

I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.

NimrodsSon Posted - 08/21/2004 : 11:01:10
quote:
Originally posted by TheCroutonFuton

I didn't realize they were Pop Punk, I thought they were more nu-metal/rap/tard-"rock"? I'll definitely add them, though, I can't argue with wanting to kill them!

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic



Oh, thakns for adding them! I didn't notice the "pop-punk" thing in the subject line, or else I would not have said that. Anyways, I believe I'll have Linkin Park and Good Charlotte killed, or rather, I'll be humane about it and just wipe their music off the face of the earth rather than kill them.


ˇViva los Católicos!
ShakeyShake Posted - 08/21/2004 : 10:55:12
Or maybe we could each give her a couple of bashes over the head with one?We'll could all take turns.You'd get yours too.


"I joined the Cult of this guy / 'cause they took my other picture away
VoVat Posted - 08/21/2004 : 10:37:47
I think Avril's death should involve a skateboard in some way. She routinely presents herself as a "skater," yet admitted in an interview that she couldn't actually skate.

Maybe she could fall down a gorge while trying to jump over it on a skateboard, a la Homer Simpson.



Cattle in Korea / They can really moo.
TheCroutonFuton Posted - 08/21/2004 : 10:25:36
Bam! Gone.

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic
Jose Jones Posted - 08/21/2004 : 09:36:53
seriously, Fountains of wayne are superb pop song writers. all of their albums are gems.

-dan
Monsieur Posted - 08/21/2004 : 06:42:52
BURN AVRIL LAVIGNE! BURN THE BITCH!


I will show you fear in a handful of dust
pfeffa Posted - 08/21/2004 : 06:20:09
Sorry, I always seem to ruin these threads by trying to save the innocent and handsome...

Please save Mark Hoppus (Blink 182)!



You know I love bassists!
The Holiday Son Posted - 08/21/2004 : 01:33:40
I don't understand what Fountains of Wayne are doing here !!???
Their first album is brilliant !
ShakeyShake Posted - 08/20/2004 : 13:39:08
First of all I'll take Avril Lavigne.
I'd take her down to my swimming pool that I've conveniently just had filled with industrial strength bleach,make her do a couple of lengths of the pool,nothing strenuous though,after that we'd take a trip to my operating theater that I've just conveniently had installed in my shed,take a scalpel and do a million zillion of the tinest little cuts all over her body,make her roll around in salt for a minute or so,take her back for anothetr quick dip in the bleach pool,pull her out,shove a needle right through the centre of her eyeballs,leave it there til I'm happy she's enjoying it,tell her I'm not gonna remove it til she puts on a big happy smile.Then for the grand finalé take a length of pipe,shove it up her arse,insert barbed wire as far up the pipe as I can,remove pipe,let her deal with it.If she's not dead after that I'll leave her to rot in my basement,maybe make some stew and feed the homeless.
I'll take Busted next time,can't be arsed right now.


"I joined the Cult of this guy / 'cause they took my other picture away
VoVat Posted - 08/20/2004 : 13:21:50
I've heard several songs of theirs. I wouldn't call them pop-punk, at least based on what I've heard.



Cattle in Korea / They can really moo.
darwin Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:43:02
I kind of like Fountains of Wayne but I've only heard their first album.
TheCroutonFuton Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:36:54
Very nice, everyone. I'm going to create the boy-bands one now..

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic
n/a Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:21:00


Busted: The Wankers:

Suspended upside down by jagged hooks through the webbing of their toes I would peel like a fucking apple in thin strips from the ankles down to their scalp stopping every now and again for a cigarette (for myself) and a hose down of high conc saline (for busted) I expect them to die of blood loss probably by the time I make it to their nipples.



Mc-Fucking-Fly:

So there's this big suspended black steel cage over a white hot coals and they're cooking slowly, I'd battle royale style promise to save the last survivor or if they don't try they all cook to death, let them fight it out whilst I watch with a corona and then I'd shove a pole straight up the ass of the traitorous survivor and spit roast him.

I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.

Cheeseman1000 Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:17:37
Yeah, I guess they're pop bands trying to cash in on the punk dollar. I'd kill Busted and McFly for damn sure. This probably doesn't mean alot to those outside the UK, but they certainly deserve to die, slowly and painful.

For Busted, I'd probably drown them in the grease harvested from their own faces.
McFly I'd lock in a room with Will Self until their heads exploded.


Kind regards,
Dr. Simon
Specialist In Broken Hearts
TheCroutonFuton Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:07:36
I haven't heard either of them but I'm trusting you that they're Pop Punk and what not. I was going to start other shitty genre Battle of the "Bands" too. For example: Boy "Bands", Slut Singers, etc.

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic
n/a Posted - 08/20/2004 : 12:03:55
add McFly and busted too... wankers.. If they were on the list I'd need longer to think up really paifull deaths

I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.

TheCroutonFuton Posted - 08/20/2004 : 11:54:17
I didn't realize they were Pop Punk, I thought they were more nu-metal/rap/tard-"rock"? I'll definitely add them, though, I can't argue with wanting to kill them!

"Freedom is a state of mind and the condition and position of your ass. Free your mind and your ass will follow." - Funkadelic
NimrodsSon Posted - 08/20/2004 : 11:52:38
Where's Linkin Park?


ˇViva los Católicos!
n/a Posted - 08/20/2004 : 11:43:11
Sum 41: I'd dig a real big pit in the middle of the desert, throw them in at night, put a giant magnifying glass over the top, sit at the edge and wait for the sun to come up..

bowling for soup:I'd utilise the big pit and craft cheese grater gloves for each of them and leave them to fight it out with the threat of shooting a bullet up their arse if they renege.. I'd then force the survivor to eat the raw and bloody remains of his evil cohorts.

I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.


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