| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Stuart |
Posted - 05/05/2004 : 17:16:36
Wooo Hoooooo today is my Chinese wedding.... not just that but it is my 28th birthday!
Last night we had a pre wedding meal with all of my Chinese family.... and I have been throwing up on ths very fine morning as a result of the spirit drinking.... man what a crazy night, that was one of the craziest nights of my life. The wifes family are mad, every second someone was making a toast and then we all had to down a stubby of baijiu (highly potent white wine).... it got to a point where it looked as if a fight was going to break out amongst them all, but according to Ming Ming thats just them showing affection..... very very bizarre, very different to a good old British wedding. There was also alot of singing, and today I have to perform a song so I am currently looking on the internet for a couple of rock ballads to croon out at an opportune moment.... I fancy a bit of classic Queen, or maybe some Poison (I'm sure 'every rose has its thorn' will go down a treat). I have been a little nervous about today as it is a strange affair in deed.... the wife however has told me to just be myself.... which is probably the wrong thing to say to me as I'm sure that gives me a license to 'drop em' during the proceedings...... and shock everyone with a display of western sausage!
I don't like cricket
I love it aah! |
| 22 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Stuart |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 19:44:16
quote:
Originally posted by apl4eris
"Sausages"? As in, *more than one*?
See Stuart, even though you may have a few peculiarities, we accept you. With those kinds of endowments, just be sure that you clopse the sneaky butcher before he can get you.
Congratulations to you both, and a long <ahem>, happy, and prosperous marriage!
I like people who glue macaroni on to a piece of cardboard and paint it gold. That's what I aspire to basically. - Tom Waits
Man life would be boring if some of us didnt have any peculiarities. Luckily Mr Sausage didn't appear, I was worried that people might have thought that I hadn't pulled the turkeys head off properly and attempted to give me a hand!
I don't like cricket
I love it aah! |
| Stuart |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 19:39:17
quote:
Originally posted by GypsyDeath
wow stuart, congrats!
id love to see a chinese wedding, i bet its so amazing. I dont know why, i just bet it is.
Happy birthday too.
Ha, i always thought you were older stu, but youre really young!! no offence young chap.
I love you for what I am not,
I did not ask for what I have got.
You will get used to me.
Welcome to your new joy.
Man, yesterday was a weird day.... I am more able to write now as I have sobered up.... I was so fucking drunk yesterday.
Yesterday I woke up with a hangover, feeling rough as you like. Ming Ming had to dress up traditional Korean dress and we got a open top car to take us to the restaurant. We drove very slowly to the restaurant.... very slowly in a town where I am the only foreigner. People were literally dropping the stuff in their hands and staring in amazement (Real, you're gonna have to get use to this kind of behaviour)... some kids would run away yelling for their parents and then come back and just stare for an eternity.
We rolled up to the restaurant and nearly got our heads blown off by firecrackers which delayed in exploding until we were right up beside them (which scared the shit out of me, remember I was in a fragile state). During the ceremony I had to eat two eggs whole, rip the head off of a turkey (which wasn't pleasant.... sorry Dave, couldn't say no as it's part of the ceremony), drink rice wine with all the tables (there were about 300 people who attended) and make a spectacle of myself. I was nervous as fuck as you can imagine... we were standing infront of a table with loads of food. A weird thing was that there were two pumpkins with big wedges cut out, which were propping up a large fish in each wedge. What I didn't realise is that the fish had been given rice wine, and were still alive (barely). So every few minutes one of them would move, and I started freaking out because I didn't know if they were alive (I assumed they were dead fish) or whether it was hallucinations as a result of drinking the night before.
It was a great day.... last night we went out with the family for a private meal and they got me wasted over again (hence the spelling mistakes).... today I really need to have a day off because I am feeling a little weird. Actually I am looking forward to going back to Beijing tomorrow, back to semi normality, adsl and downloading tunes!
Cheers all for the congrats, means alot, really.
COF - Biclops... hmmm, might have to try that one sometime. I jokingly tried to clopse the wife a few weeks ago, but she wasn't having any of it.... still the plus side is that is evidence which can be used against her in a court of law should we ever file divorce proceedings against each other. I'm sure the judge would be lenient towards the Godfather of Clopse. The question most be asked could there be a triclops?? Say we do a Crocodile Dundee 3 scenario and have a kid, they could a three cheeked offense be possible?
TP - Long time no hear, been in hiding have we??? Due to the wedding I have decided to give you a pardon, so don't worry too much mate.
Carolynanna - The Crue did pop into my head... funnily enough!
Homers - Ming Ming doesn't really look like panda, but she does look like a monkey co-incidently.
Cheers guys....
I don't like cricket
I love it aah! |
| GypsyDeath |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 15:20:50
wow stuart, congrats!
id love to see a chinese wedding, i bet its so amazing. I dont know why, i just bet it is.
Happy birthday too.
Ha, i always thought you were older stu, but youre really young!! no offence young chap.
I love you for what I am not,
I did not ask for what I have got.
You will get used to me.
Welcome to your new joy. |
| offerw |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 13:18:05
quote:
Originally posted by apl4eris
Nice one, true....but what about "I Wanna Know What Love is" by Journey? It is Journey, right?
I hate my brain for that. Sometimes it rebels against me and likes to get me stuck on such god-awful songs, even in my dreams. There goes the rest of my day.
I like people who glue macaroni on to a piece of cardboard and paint it gold. That's what I aspire to basically. - Tom Waits
Journey?! Oh how can you not know the difference between Journey and Foreigner. Really.
wilhelm |
| offerw |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 13:17:21
quote:
Originally posted by apl4eris
Nice one, true....but what about "I Wanna Know What Love is" by Journey? It is Journey, right?
I hate my brain for that. Sometimes it rebels against me and likes to get me stuck on such god-awful songs, even in my dreams. There goes the rest of my day.
I like people who glue macaroni on to a piece of cardboard and paint it gold. That's what I aspire to basically. - Tom Waits
Journey?! Oh how can you not know the difference between Journey and Foreigner. Really.
wilhelm |
| Cult_Of_Frank |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 13:05:27
Congrats, congrats! Hope you're not too long in recovering. :)
Incidentally, are you capable of a biclops given your additional appendage? I'd be impressed!
 "Join the Cult of Frank / And you'll be enlightened" |
| klikger |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 11:44:03
Congratulations and happy birthday! Sounds like a good time. :) |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 11:20:10
quote:
Originally posted by Stuart
but according to Ming Ming thats just them showing affection.....
I don't like cricket
I love it aah!
There was a panda there!?!?!?
He could talk!?!?!?
Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!! |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 11:19:03
All the best for the future Stu. You're a good guy so I really hope it works out (the power ballad I mean).
Hansel and Gretel have formed a band, .....And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Breadcrumbs!!! |
| apl4eris |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 10:17:08
Nice one, true....but what about "I Wanna Know What Love is" by Journey? It is Journey, right?
I hate my brain for that. Sometimes it rebels against me and likes to get me stuck on such god-awful songs, even in my dreams. There goes the rest of my day.
I like people who glue macaroni on to a piece of cardboard and paint it gold. That's what I aspire to basically. - Tom Waits |
| Carolynanna |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 09:55:03
Aha, there you go Stu, perfectemundo! |
| KingOfSiam |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 09:51:11
quote:
Originally posted by Carolynanna
Happy birthday!
You should bust out some Motley Crue power ballad for the wedding ;)
Like maybe "You're All I Need" from Theatre of Pain! I used to love that song! |
| Carolynanna |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 09:21:13
Happy birthday!
You should bust out some Motley Crue power ballad for the wedding ;) |
| mereubu |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 09:09:14
Yay, Stuart! Congratulations in perpetuity!
So didja flash the in-laws? Any brawls? We want to know!
 "Join the Cult of Derek/Lest you incur his Tubbycizing wrath" |
| apl4eris |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 08:05:33
"Sausages"? As in, *more than one*?
See Stuart, even though you may have a few peculiarities, we accept you. With those kinds of endowments, just be sure that you clopse the sneaky butcher before he can get you.
Congratulations to you both, and a long <ahem>, happy, and prosperous marriage!
I like people who glue macaroni on to a piece of cardboard and paint it gold. That's what I aspire to basically. - Tom Waits |
| benji |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 08:00:24
congrats stuart - your weeding sounds much more exciting than mine.....
and i hope you kept your sausages to yourself - well atleast from everyone except your wife that is..
 "I joined the Cult of Frank / I think that man deserves a DB!" |
| offerw |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 07:12:16
And some more congratulations from over here.
wilhelm |
| Ten Percenter |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 06:08:38
Many congrats, Stuart. I hope that you remembered that it is bad luck to clops the father of the bride.
"Fried food, cigarettes, no exercise, chest pain..." (Excerpt from the Angina Monologues) |
| Stuart |
Posted - 05/06/2004 : 05:27:41
Man I am fuvckerdf, thanks for the congrats, a fullk repoirt wiull come tomorrow when Ui cvan tyoe propewtkly.
I don't like cricket
I love it aah! |
| Broken Face |
Posted - 05/05/2004 : 19:27:55
Congrats Stu
-brian
- "I joined the Cult of Frank / And they tried to cut off my nuts and make me put on a blue jumpsuit"
|
| Malax |
Posted - 05/05/2004 : 17:29:15
Congrats. Have/hope you had a great day.
I May've Joined The Cult Of Frank If I Knew What The Balls Was Going On.
*Adapted By Carolynanna* |
| Adnan_le_Terrible |
Posted - 05/05/2004 : 17:22:20
Congrats!
 |
