| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Elephant |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:09:41
I kind of live near the ghetto, I live out on a farm so I have to drive on the out-skirts of the ghetto to get there.
However, often times I find myself stopping at the local corner store there (Everyone knows that corner stores are one of the hubs of the ghetto) and I've seen some strange occurrences there.
I saw these three really fat kids, who were pretty young too... probably about eight or nine. They were 'packing some nice polish' (as they say - in the ghetto) and one of them, who I suspect was their ring-leader, was talking on a cell-phone.
I'm sure they were running some sort of underground kindergarden drug-ring.
The second occurnce of ghetto strangeness occured a few summers ago, when my brother went to the same corner store. Apparently he went there to get some quick supplies (cigars, pop, chips) since usualy over the summer everyone hangs out at our house and swims or whatever.
Well he was at the corner store apparently a man had came out of a truck into the corner store with a police scanner, he went inside and put the police scanner on the counter and proceeded to grab as much shit as he could off the counters.
He asked for some bags at the till and just went down the iles swiping his arm into the shelfs, which knocked things into the bag. He must have grabbed probably three bags full of stuff. Then he started asking the person at the counter if she had any pad-locks because he needed to 'lock his stuff up'.
Well my brother was in-line infront of him the guy told my brother that he had been running from the cops, and began to brag about how his truck easly out-ran a cop car, and now he was 'getting out of town'. (The ghetto is kind of just on the out-skirts of the town, so it made sense that he would stop at this store).
My brother (not wanting to be a dick to a guy like this) proceeded to nod his head in approval and never spoke a word. He payed for his shit and got out of there. It don't know if the guy would have bought this stuff seeing as how he was already running from the police, but it's kind of un-clear.
Another time I was with my sister and her boyfriend, and we went to just go grab some snack food (Olay's Dill Pickle Chips or Jalapeno Doritos with a 1 liter Pepsi and a "Crunchie" choclater bar) and we walked in with this chick (who held the door open for us) and she had left her car on.
We let her go in-line infront of us (since all three of us were buying things and it was just her in the store) and apparently she went outside and came running back in, shoutting about how her car was stolen.
We got the hell out of there and as we were leaving she was just sitting there on the curb waiting for the cops to come I guess. I don't know what kind of comfort we could have given her, it's her fault - it's the ghetto, and you left your keys in your car.
Those are my ghetto stories, please... share your stories from your GHETTO EXPERINCES. Also if you have lived or are living in the ghetto at the time, that would be even better. |
| 35 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Elephant |
Posted - 03/02/2005 : 15:21:42
Man, I don't know what I was saying.
But I was having a conversation with a friend at the time about the fact that the human race is basically doomed because we're all about physical attraction now of days and not so much mental. It's like - the world will be over flowed with stupid good looking people in the future.
...and yes, I through in a good South Park refrence where-ever possible. |
| Carolynanna |
Posted - 03/02/2005 : 08:48:31
quote:
Originally posted by Elephant
Oh yes - the boys. I hope you had participated in my Trailer Park Boys thread a while back, or else I'm a angry Panda.
I'm sure I did, that show slays me.
Now I always seem to say Jalapeno like Ricky did on that episode. :)
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
|
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 03/02/2005 : 06:30:46
I assumed he was quoting South Park, but just got it wrong. That's my favourite episode ever.
"Hey! Little lady!" |
| dayanara |
Posted - 03/02/2005 : 06:18:52
no, sexual harassment would make him a sad panda.
Did you know that when one little panda puts his furry little willy in another panda's ear, that makes me a very saaaaaaad panda.
A monkey will eat dirt if you make him. |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 03/02/2005 : 03:32:26
quote:
Originally posted by Elephant
Oh yes - the boys. I hope you had participated in my Trailer Park Boys thread a while back, or else I'm a angry Panda.
You mean sad panda. |
| Daisy Girl |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 21:01:25
quote:
Originally posted by Elephant
Ha ha ha, you're so funny. I think you're the queen of the PUN. Ha ha ha, I think the problem with the human race is that we're all out to fuck the sexy ones and not the ones with the junk in their head.
And you're saying I have junk in the trunk? Huh? LOL |
| Daisy Girl |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:59:36
100 posts you say?? Awww... I've got a good 80-85 to go!!  |
| Elephant |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:40:38
Daisy you're kind of BLANKET POSTING TONIGHT. I got one of my accounts banned for that before, it was just after I reached 100 posts. But shhh, don't tell the moderators I've created another one.
I've been browsing these forums for probably over two years. |
| Elephant |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:35:48
Ha ha ha, you're so funny. I think you're the queen of the PUN. Ha ha ha, I think the problem with the human race is that we're all out to fuck the sexy ones and not the ones with the junk in their head. |
| Daisy Girl |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:32:54
You're not missing anything. But I think right now IS shirp fest.. j/k.
No I didn't know if I should be flattered because it was the nicest restraunt he could think of, or if I was one of many gals asked to dine with him at Red Lobster at a regular basis. Either way... it seemed a little "fishy" |
| Elephant |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:26:33
Yes you silly girl, that counts. I've never been to Red Lobster before. Infact, at the moment I don't know what the hell Red Lobster is. Perhaps I will go for a 100th post celebration at Red Lobster. |
| Daisy Girl |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 20:02:49
Hey Elephant... once when I was working in the housing projects some guy asked me if I wanted to go to Red Lobster. Does that count?
LOL keep the Elvis stuff up!!!
|
| Elephant |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 19:51:01
Oh yes - the boys. I hope you had participated in my Trailer Park Boys thread a while back, or else I'm a angry Panda. |
| Carolynanna |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 09:14:16
quote:
Originally posted by Elephant
Another time I was with my sister and her boyfriend, and we went to just go grab some snack food (Olay's Dill Pickle Chips or Jalapeno Doritos with a 1 liter Pepsi and a "Crunchie" choclater bar)
Ricky: "What kinda flavour is Jalapeno, Julian?"
Bubbles: "Jalapeno is pronounced Ha-la-pee-no Ricky. It's the same thing."
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
|
| Carolynanna |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 09:08:52
OhKay, I'll back you up, (damnit!) I heard it too when I saw the thread;
And his mama cries
’cause if there’s one thing that she don’t need
It’s another hungry mouth to feed
In the ghetto
__________
Godfather of nothing, ancesters of none.
Black glasses and feedback took my sense of fun.
|
| vilainde |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 02:06:22
Detroit may be shitty but they make the best music there! Listening to Carl Craig right now and it almost makes me want to live there.
Denis
"I believe in your perfect face..." |
| El Barto |
Posted - 03/01/2005 : 01:59:02
My favorite ghetto story is from a couple years ago when I was visiting home (metro Detroit) from PA. I grew up outside Detroit, so I most certainly have tons of ghetto stories, a lot of which I've mentally blocked (oh, the time a guy pulled a knife out at Target during the holiday return season and yelled that he wanted his 'fucking money,' or the time we were driving home down 8 Mile and some guy yelled out from his orange van "you're in the wrong fucking lane," which didn't make any sense but I still vaguely remember his face).
I was coming off of I-75 at night and stopped at the stop sign. Ahead of me, at the end of the street, was a car that was slightly poked out onto 8 Mile without its headlights on. I sit there for a sec before proceeding, thinking to myself "turn your fucking headlights on." It wasn't until I pass the car that I notice it had been completely stripped and was a glorified frame, sitting at the end of the block. This is the story I like to tell when I try to explain just how shitty Detroit is.
I guess I just wasn't made for these times. |
| kathryn |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:38:55
(on the floor, doubled over, coughing)
 I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
| Elephant |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:29:39
Yeah, I always thought why he would be paying for it. Maybe it's because he just didn't want no trouble or something. Maybe there was more then just my brother in the store at the time.
From what I've heard - my brother didn't exactly see him pay for it, since he just got out of there as soon as possible. For all he knows the man could have walked up to the til and robbed the woman working there.
I'm going to go with thet theory that he just didn't want any trouble, he probably didn't want the people at the corner store calling the police saying that he just went through there.
Or maybe... he wasn't from where we were from, and he was simply passing through our city - and decided to stop at the corner store for supplies and didn't wanna rob the police to call attention to where he was going and where had had been. |
| dayanara |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:28:40
it's alright, kathryn. i'm comforted by the knowledge that you'll never be able to view the link i posted on your fred flintstone computer.
A monkey will eat dirt if you make him. |
| kathryn |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:25:12
Dear Homers and Dayanara,
I apologize if I have offended you.
Please accept this and the forth coming "Elvis: The Greatest Hits" as my apology
Kathryn
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
| dayanara |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:22:14
whatever.
http://sounds.wavcentral.com/televis/southpark/cartman_ghetto_vid.ra
A monkey will eat dirt if you make him. |
| kathryn |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 19:17:29
I hear Elvis, little lady, not Cartman.
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
| dayanara |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 18:40:43
quote:
Originally posted by floop
i was born the "ghetto" in Chicago. not a good part of town. i wrote a poem about my upbringing there:
On a cold and gray Chicago mornin'
A poor little baby child is born
In the ghetto
And his mama cries
'cause if there's one thing that she don't need
it's another hungry mouth to feed
In the ghetto
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee!
does anyone else find it impossible to read those lyrics without hearing eric cartman sing it (falsetto) in your head?
A monkey will eat dirt if you make him. |
| broken part |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 18:15:39
i'm impressed that he actually paid for all the stuff he took. In the words of Bob Dylan 'to live outside the law you must be honest'. |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 16:05:38
I'm pretty sure that's why he took it in there, and not to show it off ; )
Pure Reason Revolution |
| Little Black Francis |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 16:01:25
it would make sense for a robber to bring a police scanner with him into a place he was robbing because he could hear if the cops had been called or not...
I think I saw that in a movie or court-tv or something, except for bankrobbers
Floops quesedillas zijn te vergelijken met het likken van fatsige Albert's aars nadat hij een fles laxeermiddel heeft leeggedronken. |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:57:29
Pretty much. They don't have acid for blood though.
Pure Reason Revolution |
| Little Black Francis |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:57:07
it's not a "police" scanner per se, it's a radio scanner. You program it to a certain channel and you can hear anyone talking on that channel like police, fire, paramedics etc.
Floops quesedillas zijn te vergelijken met het likken van fatsige Albert's aars nadat hij een fles laxeermiddel heeft leeggedronken. |
| broken part |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:53:00
what's a police scanner? is it like in 'Aliens' but instead of aliens it bleeps cops? |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:51:04
Get that man out of here.
Pure Reason Revolution |
| kathryn |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:48:46
I still believe in the excellent joy of the Catholics |
| Elephant |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:46:13
How touching Floop, and oh-so original. I find myself singing that while I'm driving home through... the ghetto. |
| floop |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:43:11
i was born the "ghetto" in Chicago. not a good part of town. i wrote a poem about my upbringing there:
As the snow flies
On a cold and gray Chicago mornin'
A poor little baby child is born
In the ghetto
And his mama cries
'cause if there's one thing that she don't need
it's another hungry mouth to feed
In the ghetto
People, don't you understand
the child needs a helping hand
or he'll grow to be an angry young man some day
Take a look at you and me,
are we too blind to see,
do we simply turn our heads
and look the other way
Well the world turns
and a hungry little boy with a runny nose
plays in the street as the cold wind blows
In the ghetto
And his hunger burns
so he starts to roam the streets at night
and he learns how to steal
and he learns how to fight
In the ghetto
Then one night in desperation
a young man breaks away
He buys a gun, steals a car,
tries to run, but he don't get far
And his mama cries
As a crowd gathers 'round an angry young man
face down on the street with a gun in his hand
In the ghetto
As her young man dies,
on a cold and gray Chicago mornin',
another little baby child is born
In the ghetto
And his mama cries
ist es möglich für ein quesadilla skrotum zu lecken? beim sprechen der quesadillas von LBF, ja. ja in der tatheheheheheheehehee! |
| Homers_pet_monkey |
Posted - 02/28/2005 : 15:35:26
Those ghettos are nothing compared to the Warsaw ghettos during the uprising.
I have no ghetto stories to share really, but I must say that that girl was extremely stupid to leave her car running.
Pure Reason Revolution |
